Why Do Women Have To Live With Their In-laws?

This week, The Swaddle team explores why caring for in-laws post marriage is something only women are expected to do.

Edit and Motion Graphics: Bavana Gone
Art Director: Neha Shekhawat
Presenter: Anahita Sachdev
Visual Researcher: Samiksha Mathur
Creative Director: Shrishti Malhotra
Executive Producer: Karla Bookman

[winterpromise]

Their parents are aging and what about our
A single girl child

[pizza]

The question is not about taking care of older ppl
It's about why only women are obligated to migrate and take care of her in laws
She is a daughter.
She too has parents.
She too wants to take care of her parents and want her husband to care about her parents the same way she cares about his parents
'She' is not selfish.

[Willtheyreadme]

I've always had this question that why a husband will get to be comfortable with his parents in his house while a wife will leave her comfort and her beloved parents?
I believe that there has to be a balance, there are two ways to achieve this balance
1. Both husband and wife will leave their parents and live in a house brought by them together
2. Both pair of parents will live with the husband and wife in their house.
Just because women have been sacrificing their comfort to live with some strangers doesn't mean they should continue doing that.
But if a woman is comfortable living with her husband's parents then that's also understandable.

[veda]

Nobody wants to live with someone else's parents tbh. It's very uncomfortable as there's no privacy or freedom to be yourself.

[kiramn]

Nothing wrong in taking care of elders. I stay with my wife and her parents. She is a working woman and I take care of her parents at home.

[prachikaushik]

What about old age of girl's parents?? Aren't we allowed to even take care of our parents in their old age?? Kab sochegi ye society inn sbb questions k answers..😩
Thank u Swaddle to address these issues..

[poojanagarajan]

I simply love this 'Overthinking It' series. Every problem spoken is felt by many women across borders and having seen the statistical perspective makes us learn how such topics should be addressed in more common forums. Thanks to @The Swaddle for your efforts and making a lot of people resonated with. Personally, I have been a great follower of your videos and it simply makes a lot of sense.Great job!!!

[rakhi]

I seriously don't understand this shitty concept. I mean just imagine leaving her parents and lifestyle is her duty and responsibility but when she wants to live independently with her husband only then she is stealing their son. Wow I mean hum to orphan hai humare to gharwale hai hi nhi....we don't have feelings. Why women always have to sacrifice everything.

[swatisaini]

Nothing wrong in living with in-laws if they understand the concept of healthy lets be honest doesn't happen in India

[riddles]

Ya...so my grandfather has 3 sons and yet he has to live with my mother(his only daughter) because all of his sons don't really care all that much...my grandpa be like-"Kya Socha thaa or Kya hogaya"🎶😝

[justsaying]

"When you are bound by duty to take care of your husband's parents,
But ironically you need husband's permission to even check on your own parents " LIKE DAMN THIS HIT HARD BRO

[sangeethaelsamathew]

The sad reality is that even parents don't expect or moreover allow the women to stay at their own homes. When a son in law visits he is given royal treatment while when it comes to your own daughter the practices change. They value a stranger who just came into their lives more than their daughter who has lived with them from the moment she is born. Also even women who know what it feels like to be treated like that are not willing to change those cultures and just continues the same internalised stupid traditions :(

[truthseeker]

To the men who easily get offended when they r reminded of their privileges in the comment section.... What about parents who don't have any son??? Just 2 daughters or 1 There are good amount of parents who don't have any son.... And they get all alone in old age while their daughters work 24/7 for someone else's parents who spent nothing on her growing up and she does that for them after giving tons of Don't talk about free home or shelter as full time maids n servants are also given that ....there are proper servant quarters in rich Imagine even those servants get some privacy and money for their work without any physical Lol

[renatareynoldsxianxian]

I'm not marrying anyone who asks me to move out and doesn't so the same themselves. Smh

[_mumon_]

I'm a single girl child, raised by a single mom. The question of who will take care of her after I get married keeps haunting me.

[shanapb]

I've asked the same question to my mother, whom replied with " of course you need to take care of your in laws and us too" and I asked her what if they refuse to let me go to my home to take care of you, she was shocked and hesitant to reply for a sec and replied that "we need to talk about that before marriage, if they don't agree then we won't take any interest in that marriage, parents on both sides are important, we won't sacrifice our daughter for their sake " .... that lit me up.... my parents want me to study well, be independent and to take decisions on my own and I respect them.

[prerna]

In the comments section I only see men talking about property and money. How cheap are you men? Most men don't even take care of their own parents if they don't get something from them. Once they inherit the property they dump their parents in old-age homes or leave them to fetch for themselves. And then same men who are equating love with money talk about women being gold diggers. You people dig gold from your own parents so let's not talk about women. Moreover same men will give gyaan on how men take care of parents in old age. The truth is most children who abandon their parents are men.

[PokhrajRoy.]

Omg ‘Baghban’ has aged so badly. There was no nuance and it was almost a requirement that women should handle the home with no help from the husband.

[shrishtimalhotra]

Everyone has the right to care for their parents, irrespective of gender!

[kritikaprasad]

anupamaa example is perfect. this woman always says lines like caring for old parents but never gos to her house. doesn't she have a old mother? doen't she have any duties for her. now at last in tomorrows episode she will go to her mothes house but why not before. why even after divorce she din't care for her mother? hypocrisy at it's peak