6 Reasons Why I'll Never Convince My Canadian Mom to Move to Germany 😫

And to think I ALMOST convinced my mom to move here from Canada... she decided to come for 3 months in the middle of the worst flu season ever. 🍁

BUT that's not only why she's pretty much decided she will never move to Germany...

I've finally gotten her to open up about 6 undeniable reasons why convincing her to move to Germany is a mission impossible!

#expats #germany #lifeingermany #expattips

—————————————————————

MY TIPS FOR LIVING IN GERMANY ✅

DISCLAIMER: Links included in my descriptions are sometimes affiliate links. If you purchase a product or service with the links that I provide, I may receive a small commission - which helps me continue to build the platform & community. There is no additional charge to you!

----------------------------------------------------

00:00 - Intro chats
01:18 - Reason 1
01:40 - Reason 2
01:57 - Reason 3
02:35 - Reason 4
07:00 - Reason 5
07:34 - Reason 6

[travelingexpats]

That’s the most difficult part of living in Germany…missing our family!

Germans can appear cold and rude at times but once you get to know them, they’re generally very nice and kind. Your mom is super sweet!❤

[Gert-DK]

Same in Denmark. Just signal you want to pass by, and they will move instantly. Saying nothing, is the same as saying: "Everything is fine". A Dane won't help you, unless you ask. But then you will get a fantastic helper. Danes will go far to help you. The system is not rude. It's actually the way we respect each other's privacy, by doing nothing.

[m.j.]

Das mit den Leuten, die keinen Platz auf dem Fußweg machen, ärgert mich als Deutschen genau so. Es gab aber auch welche, die sich sogar entschuldigten, als ich sie höflich ansprach: darf ich bitte mal vorbei? Die waren einfach nur in Gedanken oder in ein Gespräch vertieft.

[hans-dieternichau]

Ein freundliches Hallo nach Düsseldorf 🤗 Ich finde es schade das deine Mutter nicht für immer nach Deutschland kommt, aber lich kann sie auch gut verstehen es nicht zu tun!Es gibt ein altes Deutsches Sprichwort (Alte Bäume verpflanzt man nicht)Sie hat alle Bekannten und Freunden in Kanada, alles was sie erlebt hat ist dort da fällt es schwer alles hinter sich zulassen, ich kann sie sehr gut verstehen! In jungen Jahren ist es vielleicht einfacher woanders einen neuen Anfang zu wagen ! Zum Glück gibt es Flugzeuge, aber man muß dann schon so wie deine Mutter es gemacht hat eine Weile bleiben sonst lohnt es sich nicht! Ich Wünsche dir und deiner Mutter viel Gesundheit so daß ihr euch öfters Sehen könnt ! Grüße auch nach Kanada ! 🙋🙋🙋☘️☘️☘️

[MichaelBurggraf-gmvl]

Allowing people to pass by is a matter of politeness even here in Germany. However I've experienced such behaviour more often in more recent years. Possibly it's also a matter of where you are: eg. urban vs. rural area - in the latter people tend to be a bit more polite.

However, don't hesitate asking people to step aside.

[joannunemaker]

Hey, you gave it a good try. It's good seeing your mom here. What is nice, though, is she can stay in Germany for 3 months when she does come.😊❤

[khecke]

I will not move to Germany, since I lived there for 23 years and I am happy that I moved to the US quite some years ago. But I would not move to Canada either, since it is too cold up there. I lived many year in the Chicago area and I had a bad time during the winter months. That is why I moved further south.

[jensdfi]

I totally understand both of you. I lived in Canada when I was in my twenties. Friends and family are very important, and the language is too. I was fluent in English at that time and still I came into situations where I couldn't express myself in a way I did in German.
From a canadian perspective Germans are rude, I totally agree with that. And being a German it makes me angry to see other Germans (especially older ones) being so ignorant and unpolite.😢
Canada is a great place to live, and Germany is too. Both have their characteristics and I wish they weren't so far apart. I love both of them. ❤All the best to you and your mom.

[mogon]

No, it's not normal to block the way and ignore everybody coming along. It IS rude, also by German standards. The same with the instructor. Hell, If I let people wait out of my own fault, I'll take the responibility and apologize. That's what I have learned as a kid.

Unfortunately, things appear to be changing. Society has become more aggressive, people seem to forget they are not alone on this planet, and everybody has slipped into some bubble of aggravation and is unable to walk in somebody else's shoes anymore. Since the advent of (anti)social media, discussions are being poisoned everywhere, and the heat is rising in a feedback loop of sheer nonsense. It's only ME, ME, ME. From people stopping on the autobahn to take pictures of accidents to people falling off roofs because of taking selfies, common sense and respect for real people seem to be an outdated virtue nobody cares for anymore.

Take care!

[kremigmitsahne]

To Reason 4. I have to agree. In Germany, when people walk towards each other, it's like 99% of the time me who has to move to the side to prevent us from bumping into each other. Sometimes I dodge them just milliseconds before the potential impact, because I wanted to know if people really just don't care about other people around them or if they move to the side in the last moment. Turns out, they don't give a damn (and also can become sometimes super angry/threaten violence if you DO let them bump into you). Never understood this (and other similar egoistic behaviour) in Germany. Now I'm in China and 99.99% of people here consider their surroundings and move to the side, and if there is a crowded place somewhere, nobody ever gets angry/negative. It might seem like a tiny thing for some, but to me this is big and changes my whole mood and outlook to the positive. Also keep in mind that all tiny things together add up to a big cause of frustration. That said, I still love all the kind and awesome Germans and good sides of German culture. But recently it's just really frustrating to witness how hostility, coldness and angry stupidity seems to be growing in Germany. I partly blame our mass media and how people get "educated" here.

[schattensand]

Every year a recent flu shot at the begin of October helped me a lot.

[franz]

Just heard that with the gym teacher and I disagree with the "thats german", NO, it´s not, it´s only rude, you have to know that there are also simple rude people living in Germany. Maybe people tend to be nicer in CA, and maybe much more nicer in the USA (but they don´t mean it). I grew up in Germany (Bavaria) with beeing nice mostly and beeing polite (mostly) but I can be also very rude and unpolite when the situation needs it. The 2 women in your way and don´t move... they would have moved with me, believe me. I think it depends really where you live, in the north or the south (nicer) or in a town or a village. I do like your mother 😍

[Opa_Andre]

I can understand your mom very well. There is a German say, older people always tell: > Alte Bäume verpflanzt man nicht < which means Don't cut roots of old trees and move them because it will be hard to grow new ones. It's the same with my dad. BTW, is it just me thinking your mom showing first signs of becoming germanized herself? At 0:35 when you pretended her to be able to speak German well learning the language with your son. Instead of being proud of your statement or letting you get away with your little lie, she clearly disagreed with German honesty. Obviously her facial expression proved that she understood what you said in German.

[V-eq]

It is an experience I can vouch to. Germans never say sorry. Especially in the service jobs this is annoying if you are used to a different behavior. How often have I had a complaint which was based on an error of a service rep. Instead of of simply acknowledging their fault their go on the offensive.
I bought something at the bakery, paid, grabbed the bag with the items and waited for the receipt to be handed to me. But the sales person had already thrown it away. Okay, if most people don't want it that kind of becomes routine. So when I still stood there and asked for the receipt she accused me of not asking for it in the first place. As I see the process _she_ is obliged to hand over the receipt per default. And _she_ has to ask whether I want it or not. 90% of sales reps do that. But I think she knew she did it wrong because she went on the offensive. She could still have said "Sorry, I thought you won't need it because so many people never want it." That would have been an acceptable reaction. But she was simply unable to live up to a mistake. And therefore had to cover it up and blame me instead making _her_ the victim ("You didn't tell me and it's your obligation to do that.").


If your mom has this lifelong experience of being friendly I can understand she does want to give that up. And that would be in addition to be away from all the other social contacts/family she has. You Jenna in contrast, have your love of life and your kids to (over-) compensate those losses. Your mom will only have you and the grandkids, your husband to rely on. But that is not the same as a love-based relationship. Not that she does not love you and the kids. I think you understand.
And I understand well that you want her here around you.

I remember that Hayley's (Alexis) mom was asked in a Q&A session whether she could think of moving to Germany. Her answer was: "If there were kids, I would consider it." But Hayley is not planning to have kids. I did suppose that question to find out how her mom sees her experience with Germany (they were here for some weeks only). The answer was not exactly on my point. But what I take from it is: she is okay with Germany and Germans. But there needs to be a reason for moving over. So her situation (she's in the medical field I think) and her view of the USA are not driving factors. But they are also not holding her back.

Sorry, perhaps more than ou wanted to know.

[GeorgeSchenker]

Hi lovely Canadian Mother. Enjoy time with family and grandchildren as long as possible. That is a recommendation from Greek American living in Düsseldorf.

[wtsalive]

Da mein Englisch nicht so gut ist, schreibe ich heute mal in Deutsch.
Deine Mutter strahlt so eine große Herzlichkeit und Wärme aus, daß ich so ein bißchen in sie verliebt habe. Sie ist so eine Art Mensch, so mein Eindruck, denn man einfach nur knuddeln könnte.

Mit den Passanten mitten auf dem Gehweg hätte Deine Mutter nur anschnauzen müssen, dann hätten sie sehr wahrscheinlich auch Platz gemacht. Dieses Blockieren ist eine sehr dumme Angewohnheit, die man leider öfters vorfindet(hauptsächlich auf Dörfern und dann auch in Autos mitten auf der Straße)

[khalidalmuallem]

You are right about the directness in Germany, people will not move or give you way unless you explicitly ask for it

[Jochen.Lutz-Germany]

Well, I understand your mother. No friends and problems with the language. Perhaps after some more visits she will change her opinion.

[drau]

A short and loud “Vorsicht!” with a little panic-pressure in the own voice would definitely have made them move.

[afrz]

But the same thing I complain about Vancouver, in Mexico City they move in Vancouver they take up the whole sidewalk and they don’t move