Illness Intelligence: Don’t Say This to Someone Who Is Sick | Kelly Medwick | TEDxLincoln

Chances are, you’ve been talking to people with serious illness all wrong. And you’ve talked to them: over half of Americans face chronic illness in their lives. In her TEDxLincoln debut, Kelly Medwick recounts a time of caregiving for her late husband through the best—and the worst—encounters they had with others.

Kelly Medwick has worked in marketing, sales, media and nonprofit — all lines of work that have allowed her to study motivations and behaviors, putting together the stories from the clues.

[bobtaylor]

"I've never been anywhere but sick." Perfect.

[suyogphadtare]

The worst they say is "There are people who have it worse than you, you're not only one facing it". Feels like they are completely invalidating what we are going through. This sentence should be made a criminal offense.

[melcupcakeofdoom]

This actually made me cry. So many people have invalidated me in the ways she mentioned and furthermore because my illness is invisible, people say a lot of mean things, especially about accommodations.

[clairejeske]

I think a place for undiagnosed, chronically ill people would also be amazing. There are also unique barriers to being chronically ill but still pursuing a diagnosis. You’re so right that illness is alienating, so much of my time is budgeted - will I have energy for this, how much sleep did I get, what’s my pain like. Things that were easy are an event now, like grocery shopping. It’s a very difficult change to adjust to.

[kurtsherrick]

I am a chronic pain patient and it would take all afternoon to tell what I have been through and what's wrong me. I once was a little judgmental and God had let me know how wrong I was. I took my health for granite and destroyed my body by almost 50 years of outside physical work in the elements. Worked my last ten years in misery and I thank God I was able to hold out until my kid was grown as a single dad. Now I see exactly what this lady is saying and of course being a chronic pain patient I have been judged by doctors, my friends at times, Pharmacists and the list goes on and on. All I did was a man's hard work and now am treated like a criminal just to be able to have some semblance of a normal life. Yes the loneliness is ostracizing and severe depression follows and you lose your self worth when all you have known is getting up and working everyday. That is the hardest thing because working is in our DNA. God bless all and the chronically ill.

[lenaolsen]

Don't like that society thinks that if you're on disability you lose your right to a meaningful life outside work..''if you can do anything in your spare time you could instead be working more''

[justsaying]

This is wonderful. Too bad, however, our government discards people with chronic or long-term illnesses.

[turduckenwrath]

I have ME and every other illness that comes with it.
No wonder I love Flannery O'Connor so much
Thank you for this talk because it's my life

[sidtiger]

This talk is amazing! Should be required viewing for doctors, and non-chronically ill people.

[terrytarostead]

I speak for the millions that may not have seen this...thankyou👍👍👍👍👍👍

[GBisht]

I have suffered isolation and going last for hours due to my parent's chronic sickness.I am a social person but it's hard to connect to people who do not have the same situation as they mostly fail to understand the upbringing and different home environment I come from.I would be happy if we have more places where we are accepted together and people develop more illness intelligence.

[rememberotaco]

This is my aunt :( I never got to meet my uncle Eric :( I love you aunt Kelly 🥺

[aralia]

Incredibly powerful video. I have a genetic condition which progressively gets worse and is incurable and untreatable. The loneliness for my husband and I is stiffling. But I've found my relationships with others and myself are improving because I'm being more honest and more caring. This is teachable! And this was a spectacular talk. ♥️

[leealexander]

In order to feel connected I took home a pet horse. That horse helped me make a few friends in the new place in which there were only strangers. Although I have cancer I am now enjoying my life while it lasts which has so far been over 11 years longer than my doctors expected.

[m.juliannewilson]

Wow! Mrs. Medwick is awesome! Her amazing personal experience with terminal cancer is inspiring, because of how humanly and "intelligently" she handled it. How blessed her husband, Eric, was to have her, and vice versa. This talk should be a model for the professionals and patients who deal with this very complex issue.

[mereani]

Had to pause after the 2 minute mark to make a cup of tea cos I knew this talk was gonna be good ☕️

[louisebretland-treharne]

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. As first a person, an ex trained general/neurology nurse, unpaid carer, a human being with invisible plus invisible disabilities, rare undiagnosed conclusively understood neurological challenges but scan shows lesions, and less rare cancer diagnosis and recent apparently successful surgery, all the things shared within this talk the ticket to liberated freedom within context of balanced human-life reality, with a creative need for belonging using individual skills, talents and strengths, as I get the reality we all need to be wanted, valued and not left lonely and isolated. Yes-this positively resonates and so appreciated! 😀👍🌞💙🧡❤️

[daughterofelroi]

This is AMAZING! So well-spoken. Everyone goes on their wonderful vacations while some use their vacation time for medical appointments. Thank you for articulating everything we wish others knew. 💜

[mamashanshan]

I’ve had two kids with cancer. My mom, my aunt, it’s so much. I take a lot onto me for my children’s suffering, blessed we still have them. Then there’s me!! Cancer, CLD, I can’t trust doctors where I live, because how they believe!! Traveling is tough, even 4 hours away. It’s tough to have faith in these doctors up here, because they don’t believe disease can spread. CLD, I didn’t grow up here, however in Idaho, I’ve never felt such judgement, I honestly feel, they turn a blind eye now, they don’t feel many, & they believe ones that suffer are only seeking meds. There must be this one intelligent human doctor that understands, which is searching for a nettle in a hay stack. ( I even grew up with our dads being doctors and all!! ) it’s unreal. They don’t even go through our charts of all the testing we’ve been through.

[wildlightarts]

this is so beautiful. thank you so much for putting your experiences to work to inspire others to provide better, more compassionate ways to be human with one another.