How to get someone to INITIATE and show more EFFORT

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#psychology #psychologyhacks
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I had this experience..this guy needed personal space every now and then when he gets overwhelmed. And i asked for compromise that he tell me when he needs it, to which he did not agree to. So i stepped back, because i knew that it would drive my nervous system crazy if i go deeper with a person who suddenly disappears and go silent w/o a warning. Then when he came to me and said something changed (because i used to be open to him, responsive). I told him i lost interest to be open because of what happened before. Then he started explaining his side (why we was like that because of past experiences) and acknowledged that he's sorry that his actions hurt me. When i explained to him how i thrive with consistency and routine, and him talking to me daily and suddenly going silent w/o a warning would drive my nervous system crazy, he finally understood. And said he will remember it (about my anxiety).

Part of stepping back is also focusing on other areas of my life. Like my other relationships (family and friends) and my business. ❤

heddlekaterosete
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She is very right the only way most people change behavior is through punishment or consequences steming of they're own faults, not through the telling or advice of another. And these people oftentimes go right back to the same behaviors once they either get what they want or see you stoped enforcing the boundaries that hold them accountable.

onnolastnam
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This video comes at the perfect time. I'm a very patient man, but everyone has his limits... I intend to use this strategy to counter some unacceptable behavior... Francesca, thank you for sharing! ps. You'll be getting feedback, when it occurs...

georgeelder
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this is helpful, thank you. scary but helpful!

joedaley
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But i'm pretty sure he won't initiate the convo himself and if i too stop, he'll even forget me😭

elelelyse
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The problem is they will never come back

AK-
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Hi Francesca!
Recently I am in a relationship with 28 years old girl whose parents died in a car accident in her childhood and she brought up in a non governmental organisations and has no relative she knows. She said to me she is really interested in me and I am also. But the problem is she act cold and don't contact to me for few week's often and then she come back! I don’t know how to deal with her. Recently she is nowhere for around 10 week's! This is my first relationship and I don't know how to act😢
Plesae reply me

Iammostafizur