Boot camp valedictorian

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"Impressive! Do you wanna join?"
"Hell no, i just don't have a pull up bar at home"

tyro
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bros about to be getting emails for the rest of his life💀

D̸sidero
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"You just earned yourself a 24 pack of crayola crayon rations boy!"

nowknow
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“wow! so, you want to enlist?”
“nah, I was just trying to show off”

keuyvie
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“So tell me why they drafted you into the military again?”
“They said I could skip class if I did pull-ups”

Flyng_
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*puts hand on shoulder*
“Say son, how does free college sound?”

moe
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"Good job kid, I'll see you in training next monday".

Agent-obmk
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“I’d kill for a scholarship”
“Say again?”

halbyte
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Bro was flexing In front of the wrong people💀💀

pegabernethy
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“Just sign this 12 year contract and I’ll get you into airborne school”

senpain
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“Wow! Can I get your autograph at the bottom of this paper?”

leck_films
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-Do you know any strategical tactics?
-No but I can do pull ups
**gets e-mailed for the rest of his life*

dav_
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"So, why did you join the army?"

"I was tryna impress my crush"

justaredbox
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"Your in."
"Wait what?"

Baf
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Great job son! You won a free 13 week vacation to MCRD San Diego! Complete with humble and kind housekeepers and top of the line food! You ship off tomorrow...

misterpro
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“Wow, that’s impressive! Now see this uniform right here? Looks great doesn’t it? Sign this paper and you can have your own!”

RKMN-tbnv
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Recruiter: “Hey kid, you like traveling? 9 year contract and you will go everywhere”

depressedmidlifecrisistimm
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Recruiter: *You got bad form for a starter*

Clutch_Gmer
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“And that was the last time I saw him,
I ask them were he went and they said let’s just say a fun lil playground”

watsgood
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“Wanna sign a 6 year contract? Youll be MARSOC after basic training, 100% guaranteed”
GOT’EM

leocasi