The Advantages of Being Disagreeable (Low on the Agreeableness Personality Trait)

This video describes the personality trait of agreeableness and the potential advantages of having a low level of agreeableness (being disagreeable). There are advantages to being agreeable, but not every aspect of agreeableness translates into productivity. Individuals who are disagreeable are more likely to challenge poor decisions. Individuals who are disagreeable often appear as more competent in the workplace and are more likely to attain supervisory and managerial positions. The five-factor model of personality traits, which is also known as “The Big Five” model of personality. In this model, personality comprises five personality traits: openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism. The acronym OCEAN is helpful for remembering the personality traits. Openness to experience is characterized by insight, creativity, an appreciation of art, intellectual curiosity, and a high awareness of feelings. Conscientiousness is characterized by impulse control, planning tasks carefully, being highly organized and prudence. Extraversion is characterized by getting energy from social interaction, talkativeness, and having a large number of acquaintances. Agreeableness is characterized by being cooperative, increased level of caring, empathy, friendly, seeking to compromise. Neuroticism is characterized by mood dysregulation, anxiety, worry, depression, frustrating, nervousness, being easily upset, and low emotional stability. Genetics explain about 50% of personality traits, but the percentage is not the same for every personality traits. Personality traits tend to be stable over time.

[chucksareforshmucks]

I'm over 80% agreeable and I wish I wasn't. People are right; you'd believe being nurturing, yielding and accommodating would help you connect with others, but really, it's a bat signal for sociopaths and abuse.

[minimom]

It's fine to be agreeable unless it requires one to compromise their values / morals. Strength of character is more important than being liked.

[KittyKat-]

Being highly disciplined my my military father may have made me lose my precious ability to confront and set out a different path. i fight this problem daily in me, but now that I understand it better I may be able to change the tendency to defer to more of a individualist trait. I was just coping because I wanted my fathers love and approval more than anything, gifts he was very short on giving. Thank you. This has been very interesting and helpful.

[wzupppp]

Niccolo Machiavelli once said: "its better to be feared than loved if you can not be both".

[helpandbehelped]

this reminds me of a work situation where i was the only one disagreeable and fought a futile battle, ended up quitting-- losing a job i had once very much valued. in the end, my old 3 bosses all got fired because they were horrible.

[lizconnor]

Based on the advantages and disadvantages you give for being both agreeable and disagreeable, it sounds like it may be better if someone is somewhere in the middle. Very interesting!

[libertyloveslife]

i’ve been told i’m disagreeable and i was like NO I AM NOT!!!

[tinab]

Interesting. It appears my disagreeableness is why I end up in leadership roles even though I don't desire leadership roles. It just ends up that way.

[johnharrisjr]

I agree with the advantages of being disagreeable. Sometimes you have to stand up to what you believe in. Being disagreeable and agreeable in every aspect is not good either. There has to be a middle ground

[rhondabaileyyy]

I believe that there was to be the right balance of disagreeableness and agreeableness.

[thenarcissistsscapegoat]

If someone is diagnosed as disagreeable, and they agree with that diagnosis, doesn't that prove the diagnosis false? Sorry, I couldn't resist.

[manictiger]

The disadvantage of taking it to the extreme is that you may wind up homeless because no one wants to take you in.
The advantage is that you may wind up rich, because you never submitted to become a slave for a system that doesn't care about you.
I've been in both situations and I can say it is definitely worth it to stay disagreeable. I'd rather be dead than mediocre. "Keep your head down and don't make waves." AHAHAHAHA! I pity the fool.

[nathrogers]

You need to be able to be agreeable and disagreeable as the situation requires.

[tuck-brainwks-eutent-hidva]

Rural-Ohio-kudos (they're like "dittos, " but less inflammatory 😏) on the country star (in your background). That's as agreeable as I get -- from one (actually, only somewhat) "disagreeable" to another (self-described at one point, as I recall...?), good talk! Story time: 1987, College retreat, complete with umpteenth personality-spirituality- 🙄. As we sat around pondering the results, astute campus pastor invited us to consider where we thought Jesus might fall on the little grid...? His comment has been ballast for my journey toward balance for 30 years. Wherever you are, Dave Kehret -- thanks! (For everything! 😊)

[zureezee]

It was interesting to know there are disadvantages to being agreeable as I always thought it's a good thing. I see where being to agreeable can lead to [passivity and becoming overwhelmed as they are less likely to be assertive

[robs]

I scored the lowest on agreeableness at 1 on the Big 5 Test. I'm Disagreeable but I pick and choose my battles of when to assert myself.

[tashastarling]

Many commanding individuals such as lawyers talk about the relief they get from taking a submissive role in their marriage. Yet live a completely different work lifestyle. The opposite can be true for people submissive in their workplace. Most personality facets seem to have a role and place in many aspects of living and are adaptive. I'm curious what truly are the core concepts that make up the permanent nuance to each individual's personality.

All these traits get very confusing as they don't really take into account differents aspects of living. It was mentioned I think that depression can cause contradictory displays of personality facets. Perhaps from unresolved identity. I wonder if machiavellianism or something like it effects the display of these characteristics too. And how machiavellianism relates to conscientiousness (I feel there must be a missing descriptor here that bridges these concepts).


These old videos on theory are my favourite. Hope to see more of them worked in. Thank you Doctor for sharing your mind and thoughts.
It makes me very sad most scholarly articles are blocked behind pay walls and institutions. You bring so much knowledge to us and also do it in an admirably coherent way.

[emergination]

Love this, but it seems to be from a business POV, where relationships are not as important as out put. I would love to hear your remarks from the POV of the interpersonal relationships we value more than those we may have at work.

[davemckay]

Thanks, Dr. Grande for the compelling video

[angelinastanton]

This was a great video explaining the pros and cons of high versus low levels of agreeableness. Although I scored low agreeableness on the five-factor model of personality assessment, this video helped me to see how disagreeableness is also a strength. Having grown up with a mother who is extremely agreeable (opposite of myself), it was always difficult for me to see her struggle with always trying to keep the peace and watching others take advantage of her agreeableness. I wonder what techniques or interventions counselors would use with clients who are on the extreme end of agreeableness, and if it would produce effective client outcomes.