When narcissists have a midlife crisis

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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

[aletheiai]

Ageing makes empty vessels more difficult to fill.

[LB-dvdb]

When my narcissistic ex hit 50, he started exclaiming frequently “ I am an attractive man!” He would tell me “ people wonder why I’m with you”. He also started stating that he “ had come to realize that it was time to put himself first”. As if he had ever not put himself first.

So happy that I get to go through the latter part of my life without him.

[tamiejones]

When my ex turned 40 he put out an ad for a travel companion because he wanted to travel the world without the kids we still had at home. He hired on a bigger narcissist who was 23 so they could travel and explore the world. Good Riddance to Bad Rubbish! I'm free to enjoy my children and the rest of my life. :)

[dakoderii]

Man shall reap what he sows. Yes, even self-righteous, deluded narcissists cannot escape it.

[poison_plays]

I will never stop shaking my head at how narcissistic people obsessively chase after people who are far too young for them and then—at least with vulnerables—bitterly complain about how immature their partners act.

At least the younger partners may eventually grow up and mature into healthy full adults! The narcissistic people 40+ who chase them never will. Sad, really.

[OTLMAKES]

I am going through a divorce after 36 years of living with this type of person. I feel so FREE ! !!! now that I can see who they really are.

[HeeersEllery]

Empaths probably feel quite comfortable being alone in midlife after running away from narcissistic relationships. Narcissists, as they lose their youthful attractiveness and charisma, probably become basket cases and have a tough time accepting the fact that the younger, more attractive narcissists are now sucking up all the supply.

It’s called “hitting the wall”.

I’d like to edit this comment to add that this applies both equally to men as women. I have known (but not been the direct target of abuse(mostly)/infidelity/etc) more men than women who would fit the term “hitting the wall”. Hopefully, the hurtful narcissists lose their ability to charm (and ultimately spellbind and entrap) us or any future victims as they *all*, both male and female, hit the proverbial wall.

[DJH]

Absolutely narc ex husband got much worse as we aged. He told me 30 years ago if I gained weight it was grounds for divorce. Then he packed on 70 lbs. Heard his father degrade his mom for gaining weight when they were in their 80s. So I knew the behavior was just going to continue to get worse. Got out when I could. So thankful I did.

[steveblobs]

I think this is the best video for those who long for closure after leaving their abusive relationships. You want justice to be served? You want narcissist to pay for their abuse? There it is. It's coming to all of them. And you don't have to do anything. 😉

Just remember that staying with an ageing narcissist will be increasingly difficult. It may be the time to consider what you want to do with your own life.

[cherylwestbrook]

I remember in my youth thinking, "looks will fade, better work on that personality!" LOL Now that I'm in my 50s, and the looks do fade 😊, I'm glad I was aware of this in my youth. When you're young, you think you're the most attractive person in the world. Then you grow up and realize there's millions of others just as attractive and that's okay. 😊 But no matter your age, a good personality really is the most attractive thing about a person!

[matcha.byebye]

my mother hit 50 and started telling people, "look at me i'm like a 20 yr old, im young!". Dropped 80lbs, began cheating and drinking excessively, switching jobs 4 times. all while driving a wedge in everyones in my family's relationships more than ever.

[jennifernichols-stewart]

This describes my husband exactly. The young attractive guy turned to a woman 20 years younger as she gave him all the validation he ever wanted. He angrily ended a 30 year marriage and abandoned me and his two grown children. Hides from his friends and family and takes no accountability in his actions. Blames me. Started purchasing enhancing medication, buying more youthful clothes, the works. It’s been an unbelievable blow to our family. He’s nobody we ever knew. And this poor woman eats all of the lies, egocentric needs up with a spoon. I dare say that she, in fact, is a narc too. Telling me straight to my face she’ll not back off. He’s always been this way, looking at himself in the rear view mirror, lying, cheating, stealing and then walks around like it’s owed to him. And I dare say that he’s got this armor of entitlement in our community that he wears like a shield. Add to this fact that he’s an alcoholic. It’s taken me almost three years to gather myself together and find help from people like you to help me distinguish what was happening. I’m not crazy. He just made me feel like I was.

[cindyallen]

My husband of 25 years (around age 60), lost both parents within a year, kept saying he wanted a "party" lifestyle, and ultimately dumped me for a party girl clearly looking for someone to take care of her and provide her with a lifestyle (beach house, boat, motorcycles). The kicker was, he dumped me on Friday and showed up with her, introducing her to our friends in a local bar on Friday night -- not recognizing how insane that looked. Anyway, I'm out and happy for it. Now that I know what narcissism is, I overlooked zillions of red flags thru that marriage and put up with way too much bad behavior but I think a midlife crisis made it much worse.

[pamtyler]

Thankfully my narcissist found his midlife crisis new supply. Divorced now and never been happier. I get to spend my senior years on my own.

[jannlewandowski]

Hi Dr Ramani. Boy, my ex went NUTS looking for young girls after I finally left him. He was in his late 50's and started Bar hopping. He finally met a RICH woman (in a bar) and married HER MONEY. He was very particular about his looks, and his clothes, so i can imagine what he told her. They look like Father & Daughter together. This was over 12 years ago. I'm sure he had "work" done on his face to look younger. Not only are they GEEEDY MONSTERS, they are FOOLS!

[michele]

Yes, my 62 year-old husband has quit our common law marriage and announced that he's going to live in a camper van. Hard to do in Canada. Good luck. Thank God I bought a home in the country. I have a bathtub and central heating and three bedrooms.

[Thrivar]

Catastrophe is an understatement....tight clothing, drinking more, partying, discovering new substances like bhangi, cheating, especially with young partners, creepy all finances for grooming himself and buying items like shoes hat are worn by the younger a complete loss of one self....I've watched my spouse go through this and its creepy

[alexisscarbrough]

When I hit 42 I had the realization things weren't going the direction I'd like to die in. My husband was abusive to the kids and me, my mother was controlling and cruel, and I just couldn't take it anymore.
My narc mother kept saying, "You're just going through a mid-life crisis, " as if it were a stomach ache or a hangnail i could clip off.
She gave no advice, only Xanax and abuse. It lead me to realize my motherwound and abusive marriage.
I began therapy immediately.

[survivor]

My vulnerable/ covert narcissist ex decided that he was bisexual & wanted to explore his other side whilst still expecting to continue his relationship with me. He wanted cosmetic surgery, dressed younger, got numerous piercings etc etc, thought every Male he came across fancied him, tried to get in with his teenage kids social lives.He looked/ looks ridiculous.Sees rent boys.I didn't know what narcism was as that time but fortunately 4me it was the trigger 2finish the relationship.Thanks to Dr Ramani I'm now learning & understanding what narcism is.I don't know where I would be without this channel

[seaseaseevanlife]

Just when I think I’m not a narcissist…
I hear something which arouses my suspicions once again.