The Dumbest Dating Mistake Everyone Makes... (Matthew Hussey, Get The Guy)

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Last week I showed you how to respond to a flakey guy using my killer “Bliss Point” texts - which combines being salty and sweet to make a guy totally addicted to you.

Except…

Some of the more angry responses said things like:

“Matt, why would I even think about being sweet to a guy who flakes on a date?? He should be chasing me already, and if not, I have a right to be angry when I text back…”

To tell you the truth, I’m really glad these comments came up (and I kind of expected it).

In this week’s video, I’m about to show you why this response relates to a huge mistake 99% of people make in dating.

Make sure you don’t fall into this common trap...

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[monalisisodia]

Dude, that's a brilliant life skill to have: Be ruthless with your actions, not with your tone. Thank you:)

[melly]

To be honest, I'm not caught up in finding a man, etc. I love how your lessons are so universally applicable to navigating life in general.

[karnagilgamesh]

This man is an artist with his words when dealing with sensitive women. He basically told them to not be masculine and aggressive in the most passive way I've heard. His referring to women as people when he said "one the dumbest mistakes people make in dating..." In order to not make them feel like he was calling them dumb was amusing and smart.

[Yeodoongiiie]

It's so strange though. Because this advise is not only true, but it just holds so much power. When you are nice and sweet but keep your standard and all that, people just come crawling back to you. It's got this magmatic power over people. It works on me when guys do it to me, and it works when I do it to guys and other friends. It's just very very powerful. Haha. I've never seen it fail. Matthew is absolutely right on this one.

[hkvideos]

"Be ruthless in your actions, be kind in your Life lesson.

Thank you Matthew 🙏🏼

[jjuniper]

I was married 24 years, and my husband passed away 4.5 years ago. When we were first seeing each other, I was sweet, vulnerable, and he knew what I did and did not tolerate. He reciprocated. 😊 Amazingly, I was only 19. He was as kind to me, as I was to him. And in the rough times, it was that sweetness that we remembered, and held us together.

Never underestimate how kindness can exalt and liberate.

☮️ Peace 😊

[Deppherillion]

It's funny to watch this as a guy...

[Saltydogg]

very true. I've never been mad at a person i planned on never seeing again. my wife on the other hands makes me want to jump into on coming traffic.

[boomerangsruckflug]

It's the expectations! As soon as we fall in love we begin to imagine being already married with them! That's why we get that disappointed which tempts us to overreact!

[klulouis]

I'm a newly trained therapist & I 100% agree w/this. I am constantly teaching my clients how to become emotionally intelligent & empowering them to find stability/control in their identity... not in someone's actions or lack thereof.

[jojoalexander]

This is soooo true
You've got to be confident with yourself and love yourself and then you won't put up with crap from other people. Fall in love with life and your dreams and goals and then you'll attract other people
You can't chase love it has to chase you
❤️

[samweintraub]

This doesn’t just apply for dating. Great life skill to learn. Thanks man keep up the good work

[tiffany]

This actually makes a lot of sense, thank you!

[gracelewis]

To everyone asking how you do this - it's boundaries! It's taken me a long time to really get this, and took a while to really hit home, but it's SO worth learning. Anne Katherine's two books - boundaries and where to draw the line are SO helpful, and Iyanala Vanzant's shows and YouTube channel (the r spot) are SO good for reminders and reorienting to this way of thinking.
Matthew this is spot on. So good too! I love hearing this in a new way - it really hits home for me. I'm dealing with a narcissist ex that I still have to be in contact with, and this is a really great additional lens to view it through. Where is he focusing on tone, and where can I focus on action? Yes! So helpful to have as a life skill :) thank you. This helps in more ways than perhaps even you know. Us women are often not taught how to do this - as perhaps your comment section is showing. In some/many cases actively discouraged from having these in the appropriate priority. All the help we can get in re-prioritizing the important one - action - is so, so welcome!!

[podawe]

This is so true. As a guy, if a girl is angry or bitter or bratty, I just get annoyed. If she is super sweet and warm and friendly (even if I know I'm being a jerk) and then suddenly starts ignoring me or not wanting to see me as a consequence of my actions, I start to panic and try to redeem myself. Moral of the story ladies, ALWAYS be sweet and caring even if inside you're boiling, but don't be afraid to follow through with your actions when your standards aren't met

[rad]

“Be ruthless in my actions, be ruthless in my actions, be ruthless in my actions”
Tomorrow news headline: crazy ex bf kills girl for cheating

[mariyamlifsha]

This is so true. Keep standards. No one can push anyone down. ☺

[EngineeredTruth]

I'm a dude and this applies to me. I didn't like Matthew's content at first, but it has grown on me fast!

[juliensorel]

The saddest part is that this is exactly what a caring dad would tell his young girl about life and people.
Those women obviously never had any of this.

[ieugeniya]

Hi Matthew!! Thank you for this one! 🙏🏻 I literally watch this video every day because I am determined to burn this idea in my brain and re-wire my neural network for how I handle my own emotions and other people's behavior! 💪🏻
I also been using that advice in the other areas of my life and let me tell you, for the first time in my life I feel like I AM "in control" (your words!). I am still working on getting all my shit together, but for the past two weeks I actually made progress because NO ONE EVER explained it as well as you did! So, my deepest gratitude for this video. 💋