7 FRENCH HABITS AMERICANS FIND RUDE

Every country has its own habits and way of doing things and French culture is no exception. Let's learn about normal French habits that are normal in France but might be considered rude in the United States and other places abroad. French people doing these things in the U.S. aren’t deliberate efforts to be disrespectful or offend Americans. They’re acting appropriately in their culture, but cultural norms don’t always translate. When we travel, we can act however we want but I think it’s important to be aware of how our own cultural norms from our home country can be perceived abroad and then make the changes we feel are appropriate. And also to give foreigners a bit of a break because like I said, 99% of the time, people aren't trying to be rude. Cultural education and understanding goes along way!

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Salut! I'm Diane, an American who has lived in France since 2012 and the creator of the blog/YouTube channel Oui In France. My channel's focus is "Everyday French life and beyond." I make videos on French culture topics, France vs. US culture comparisons, with a sprinkling of food, travel, and language topics and give you my thoughts about what it's like living in France as an American in the Loire Valley. Thanks for being here and if you enjoy this sort of thing, please share with friends and subscribe!

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#frenchculture #culturaldifferences #livinginfrance

[kasperkjrsgaard]

As an European I find it rude that an american employer won’t pay his staff a reasonable wage but choose to let the staff beg the costumers for money.

[russellbeach]

I admit the first few times in Europe I thought it was a little rude how people spoke. Now I find it refreshing that they cut out the BS and you know exactly what they think.

[johnhendriks]

I am Dutch and feel the same way as the French and I think their behaviour is normal. Americans find a lot of things rude. But it is annoying that everything is great, awesome or amazing. Saying I love you all the time. If you do this all the time, it means nothing and you lose nuance in conversations.

[haleywhitney]

I live in Bordeaux… for two years from Denver. First, I love France and the French people have shown my family so much kindness and help. Getting to know families and traditions has made me feel more at home and the grocery store, pharmacy and tabac clerks have become so helpful and special. They know my kids and ask how I’m am and help me with my French. They open up about themselves and try their English as we get to know each other better. These are people I see weekly. I also wave and say Bonjour to my neighbors in the mornings and afternoons to and from school with my kids. People in France are friendly and are generally wanting to be friends. It just takes some time.

[yvesvandevyvere]

If Americans think the French are direct or blunt, they shouldn't visit the Netherlands. The Dutch are even way more direct.

[Roberto-xcxy]

Ok. In France (as in most countries outside the US) waiters are paid real wages. In France it is considered and respected as a professional role and not the refuge of out of work actors and college students. In most countries outside North America tips are reserved for those who offer exceptional service, not extorted from customers as a right because restaurant owners are too cheap to pay their staff proper wages. And BTW, our (US) tipping culture is out of control!!

[jeannamcgregor]

I have travelled to France enough in the last decade (and gotten brave enough to use my French more freely) to learn that the American stereotype of the rude French is quite wrong, and I get a little offended when I hear a friend imply that French rudeness is expected. So I've started telling stories from our travels that illustrate my view. And I have to thank you for some of my change of heart. Plus, you have saved me from embarrassment at the check-out counter because I properly weighed my produce first. Thanks!

[teamajaniemi]

Oh? The *French* are considered reserved??! :O As I'm from Finland, this is music to my ears. I thought we Nordics were the only ones considered rude in this way. But you got it absolutely right: it's actually a way of being polite.

[ericericson]

A friend and I were discussing a subject and the it became a little heated. I learned after that our wives were trying to figure out ways to separate us if we came to blows, but after a while it calmed down and he looked at me and said, "finally, someone I can talk to!" It really is a different mindset.

[Mpshfromlowell]

My experience is that French people are no more impolite than anyone else. Certainly, Parisians aren’t any more rude than New Yorkers. Even the old stereotype of French people being impatient with Americans trying to speak their language wasn’t true. Most people in Paris seem to appreciate any honest effort to communicate. When I used my very poor French, people generally got the idea and responded accordingly….

[JRspeaking]

How refreshing that you can have a lively conversation at the dinner table without everyone getting their feelings hurt. I wish this was the norm in the USA.

[brucelangsteiner]

I love the use of "pas mal." My wife and I joke around when asked how something was, we reply "it wasn't horrible." Being 72, I can truly appreciate their frankness (pun intended). Life is too short to dance around a topic. Be direct, but don't be cruel.

[clairejanson]

I really appreciate your comprehensive, tolerant approach of both nationalities. I agree with every habit you described (by the way, I'm French)

[lynnesookdawar]

Diana, as a professional cross cultural content developer and facilitator, I d like to congratulate you particularly on your way of delivering what could be a touchy subject (no matter the culture !) as a Brit. I lived and worked in France for many years, and the points you touched on are spot on. In my job, I was in charge of a vast programme to help French customer service people understand and adapt to US customers and these were some of the things we dealt with..you are right in saying the French show respect by distance and the US by showing an interest, largely speaking of course. I ve also worked a lot with the Dutch on a daily basis and my French colleagues also found them extremely direct and often “rude”. Looking forward to more of your videos!

[angiebee]

I once saw an older French woman call out a young couple who didn't pick up after their dog. She even pulled a poo bag out of her purse and gave it to them when they said they didn't have anything with which to pick it up.

[josephinedagostino]

"If you can't be kind, be quiet"...love it!

[frenchguy]

Most of the list is indeed cultural differences, but not picking up after your dog is rude and disrespectful of others in any urban environment.

[alexstokowsky]

My German neighbor saw someone's dog had pooped on her lawn. She picked it up and put it in a bag, went to that person's home, handed the bag to them and said, "Here, I saw your dog pooped on my lawn. Next time you put it in a bag and get rid of it." The person was so surprised they said nothing. I rather enjoyed her German ways.

[berndf]

If you find the French too "direct", brace for a shock when coming to Germany. 😂

In British English "not (too) bad" is used much in the same way as "pas mal" in French (at least almost; French "pas mal" is a tad more positive). The use of exuberant adjectives is mainly an American thing and many Europeans, not only French, find it at times over the top.

[Off_the_clock_astrophysicist]

The "negative slant" of language has a lot to do with intonation, which can be difficult for non-natives. A French person will exclaim "Pas mal!" with the same intonation as one uses for "Great shot!". The interpretation for natives is crystal clear. Repetition also works "Pas mal, pas mal..." means "I'm impressed". Or there is the "Pas mal du tout", meaning "fantastic". In the US, we are actually quite unique in how over the top we are in our praises. I encounter that in the academic world, when sometimes I have to obtain letters of support or recommendation from colleagues abroad. I try to ask colleagues who know a bit about US culture so that their letters will not sing praises in tones that are too muted. In the US, this will come accross as a negative letter.