Dr. K, How Do I Focus?

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▼ Timestamps ▼
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00:00 - Preview
00:10 - Reddit Post
03:16 - Accepting a day is a loss
07:27 - Understanding and controlling the mind
15:25 - Boredom
20:32 - Sitting with the self
23:52 - All roads lead to one place
28:12 - Questions

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"I was not willing to waste a day, and in that I almost wasted my entire life." This line made me tear up realizing I've been through that.

CodyMerritt
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The statement "being not able to tolerate frustration" hit me more than I thought

LorekeeperThal
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I always interpreted "you've got time" as "you've got time before you need to start" instead of "if you start today, you've got time to work on it"

anonymone
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reminds me of when I was in HS. i had a big art project I kept putting off because I didn’t think it would turn out good. my art teacher said “I’m giving you the weekend but it has to be turned in Monday, finished or not”. she was actually being nice and giving me more time bc it was already late. so my mom makes me sit down at the table and I wasn’t allowed to do anything except paint. it was barely worked on. i didn’t wanna do it at all. but guess what? eventually I just started painting because of boredom. i ended up finishing my whole painting (it was pretty big) and turned it in that monday. the look on my art teachers face that morning lol she didn’t think I’d finish it, hell I didn’t even think I would. it ended up being put into a college art contest and I won 1st place. someone even offered to buy it from me. definitely gonna start practicing this method more! ☺️

HeyItsLights
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Man… “I was not willing to waste a day, and in that, I almost wasted my entire life” is beautifully profound.

bdonbits
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Takeaways:
→Acknowledge the different parts of you (the self and the mind).
→ Hard reset : delete the options of productive & dopamine and reduce it to work & boredom.
→ Analyze whether the productive action is scheduled or an antidote to boredom.
→ Check what is driving your action through self introspection.
→ The self has to overcome the trickery of the mind.
→ Sometimes you should be willing to waste a day so that you don’t waste years.

mrblok
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I finally realize why dr. K timing is so perfect... it's because 99% of his videos are relatable to something we are doing wrong and we try to be better so of course the timing will be always perfect.

procrastinathor
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I just realized that the "mind" in this case, is basically your inner child. It wants to do anything but be serious, and like a child you might raise irl, you have to consciously create circumstances where they have to do the one thing they never want to do. The child will cry, lash out, say mean things, and get clever to get what they want, but ultimately it's up to you to stand your ground.

Thank you Doctor K for explaining the "mind" and "self" in a way that I could understand, and hopefully, get shit I want done, done lol.

lasagnakob
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"But we're gonna waste the whole day!"
"Let's do it."

hahaha love this. Treat your mind like a kid throwing a tantrum.

hayleymahaney
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"We're gonna waste the whole day? Let's do that."
That one sentence felt so weirdly empowering to hear, like the whole time I've been feeling like I'm wasting day after day and feeling guilty about it, it's as if this time, by getting out and confronting my mind about it and showing it that THAT WAS A CHOICE WE MADE, suddenly my mind starts to take accountability for that and squirms and tries to do something else. Seeing yourself really is the first and most important step in getting control of yourself.

TwentySeventhLetter
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He's talking about the studies with schizophrenia, I am living proof of how it can work. I got schizo about 10 years ago, and spent about 8 of those years doing nothing much, not having motivation to do anything productive or positive or in any way live life(it's called avolition). But now I'm in therapy and I'm working on these variables and my life is totally different. I'm exercising, doing hobbies, meditating, cleaning, *actually showering on a regular basis*, and tons more. I felt hopeless for so long and now it's insane how much better I feel and how much better my life is.

TheMarmadukian
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To try to understand and "hack" my ADHD, I have watched countless videos, listened to dozens of podcasts, conducted hours upon hours of reaearch, seen therapists and psychiatrists, and paid for special courses/workbooks. This video, above all else, has been the greatest revelation for me. All of it. I could go on and on, but I have work to do and it's time to follow the advice in this video and give myself two options: do the work or be bored. Let's go!!!

Thank you for all of your content, Dr. K!!!

klindsay
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I was doing that "I will stare at a wall until Im really bored" and it really works...I should start doing it again, since obviously more people think thats a quite good strategy

simbian
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Ever since the pandemic started, this became a habit of mine. I'm just constantly finding excuses or distracting myself over the chores I need to do. Even at work I just make things take longer that they need to and that leads me to "stay working late" when in reality I did my task in 30 minutes with an hour of distraction every five minutes.
Heck, even writing this comment is distracting me from my tasks!
I'm going to start applying this method asap!

mandragonna
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15:40 ‘So when my dad was in medical school he had a rule for himself. That if he didn't feel like studying, and he taught me this rule by the way if he didn't feel like studying he wouldn't study. He was allowed to sleep as much as he wanted to, he was allowed to sit there and do nothing as much as he wanted to but those were his only two options besides studying. That's it nothing else.’

martinnhantran
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I can’t believe these videos are up for free, I wish I found this channel earlier because it’s provided me so much value already! Dr. K’s lessons have really changed the way I see myself and they’ve taught me so much about how my mind works. Really appreciate the time the team puts into these ♥️

heatah
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10:37 Frontal Lobe
11:36 Work v Boredom v Productive v Dopaminic
15:25 Power of Boredom
15:41 Tunnel Vision or Idle (Boredom)
18:39 Productivity not framed as Off-Track
20:32 Sitting with the Self (Our Thoughts & Emotions)
23:53 All Roads Lead to One Place (Not Work)
25:58 The Mind is on our side, It just needs to Trust
28:43 other: A Pure Self in Existence

jryce
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Heard plenty of times that boredom can be the problem AND the solution. The real solution here was to mold the environment so the "productive thing" was the only thing you were allowed to do when you were bored. If that means not having an internet connection and only having a single program on your device that lets you do the work you need to do that you must be, so be it.

If the work is something you're absolutely passionate about, the challenge is reasonable enough to push you to your limits, the reward is immediate+obvious and points you towards doing even better work, and the time constraint is just enough to force yourself to do absolutely nothing but that task, that should be a recipe for flow perfection. Flowmadoro (modified tomadoro where you count up time instead of count down and the break is equal to the time working divided by 3) should do wonders with this kind of environment.

SimGunther
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“The self is held hostage, or the mind is held hostage.
Right now the mind is holding you hostage!”
Thank you for this reminder.

PrestoJacobson
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This video is one of Dr K's best yet. The idea of challenging yourself to a boredom contest is incredible. Definitely a new tactic I'm going to experiment with

bim_buswick