The extraordinary effect of mindfulness on depression and anxiety | Daniel Goleman | Big Think

The extraordinary effect of mindfulness on depression and anxiety
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Everyone's experience with depression is different, but for comedian Pete Holmes the key to living with depression has been to observe his own thoughts in an impartial way.

Holmes' method, taught to him by psychologist and spiritual leader Ram Dass, is to connect to his base consciousness and think about himself and his emotions in the third person. You can't push depression away, but you can shift your mindset to help better cope with depression, anxiety, and negative emotions. If you feel depressed, you can connect with a crisis counselor anytime in the US.
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PETE HOLMES:

Pete Holmes is a comedian, writer, cartoonist, "Christ-leaning spiritual seeker", and podcast host. His wildly popular podcast, You Made It Weird, is a comedic exploration of the meaning of life with guests ranging from Deepak Chopra and Elizabeth Gilbert to Seth Rogen and Garry Shandling.
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TRANSCRIPT:

PETE HOLMES: You woke up in a conundrum. You were born into a conundrum. And I don't care how we label it or lower our anxiety by going, well, it's this and it's not this, and it's that -- let's just talk about this shared mystery that we're soaking in. I want to be careful here, talking about depression, because I had a friend who was very depressed, and I remember talking to him, out of love, trying to explain some of these ideas, some of these ways that we can think and interpret our suffering. And sometimes when someone is suffering, the last thing they want is for you to go, 'Hey, there's another way to look at this.' That's later. None of this is to be imposed on anybody, and I don't want to belittle or just say, 'You know your brain is -- it's your attachment to your desire to not be depressed that's causing you--' no, none of that. That is not what I'm saying at all. We can give space to someone's depression. We can love them, we can honor -- we can just eat some noodles, we can watch some movies, whatever it is. We can just sit and not talk. That's real stuff. It's a real -- I don't know if you call it a disorder, a disease, but it's happening, and we don't need to coach people through with ideologies.

That being said, if you're in a place to talk about this, usually when you're not depressed, I found it helpful to step inside what I call the witness. And other traditions call that your soul. I believe science might just call it the phenomenon of your base consciousness. If you think about when you were born -- I have a baby girl now; she's not thinking in ideas yet. She doesn't know she's American. She doesn't know she lives in California. Just like a ladybug doesn't know it's Italian. You know what I mean? It's just awareness. So she's just there. But slowly over time, we build up what Jung and others called the false self. So we have the story of who we are. I'm a man and I'm a comedian and I'm a tall man, I have big teeth, and all these things, and I like the first two Batman movies, and I don't drink coffee, or whatever it is. So you build up this identity. And oftentimes, in that identity is where things like suffering are occurring, sometimes. I can't speak for everybody. But I will say that for me, when I've been depressed -- and I get depressed. I have irrational bouts of anxiety. I have random FedEx deliveries of despondency. Just like, "I didn't order this. Oh, well, keep the PJs on, cancel everything you're doing today. It's time to take a sad shower." That happens to me. So I'm speaking for me with full respect to other people's processes and their experience.

When I'm depressed, if I can get into that quiet space, it's the space that's noticing the thoughts. So if you think, 'I'm hungry' -- we always just think that 'I'm hungry' is the thought in the animal, and then we eat, and then it goes, 'Thank you.' Who's talking to who, really? I would say that the thought is talking to your awareness, your base awareness, your witness. So that's what's watching your thoughts. And if you can get into that, you see how impartial and unswayed by your life circumstance this witness really is. It's just there. It's neutral. It's just is-ness. It's just this. And it's just watching. It's compassionate, it's involved, it's invested. But it's not really as connected and tied to the events of your life story as you are, as your false self is. So when those depressions happen, I found it helpful -- and this is something Ram Dass taught me -- is instead o...

[Gandalf-The-Green]

I suffer from recurring depression and have found that walking really helps. I recently walked 6-12 km each day for about 2 weeks and that made a huge difference for my well-being. When I walk my mind is strangely active and has its very own notions on what it wants to think. When I walk, my thoughts are very positive even when I am depressed. After some time, walking really soothes the mind if you let your thoughts ramble.

[yesntpittzant]

Depression makes you see everything based on emotions. Naming those emotions makes you see everything rather neutral and objective

[Hyper-Linkman]

I swear, Big Think has some of the best timing for releasing their videos. This topic has been on my mind for some time, and Daniel Goleman perfectly articulated the benefits of practice, opposed to other videos I've seen which just tell you a method with no scientific basis. From someone dealing with adult ADHD, this video has cleared up some of the doubts I had in the efficacy of cognitive behavioral therapy that has been recommended. Thank you!

[SomosLaNuevaEra]

Sending good vibes and love to anyone who comes across this video! Greatness is coming‚ this is your year! ❤

[limeros]

Mindfullness is the tool to shift to a neutral observation mode, and therapy is to then choose in wish direction you want to go.

[demonsureiya]

Mindfulness helped me out a lot dealing with cognitive dysfunction, before my brain constantly goes full panic mode and deals with brain fog continuously 24/7. I couldn't think, or do anything I felt fucking useless. But learning about mindfulness and practicing it, I saw a lot of improvement with interactions towards my recovery, things, people, problems, confrontations, struggles and all things in my life. I'm gonna continue going forward on this and I hope for the good. I really wish everyone their best with dealing with their struggles and hope something comes that will benefit you, your mental health and life. Stay strong ❤

[Callmethebreeze]

I’m in a mixed state of bipolar…was so happy recently having my awakening but going without a psych med for a week and husband in the hospital last night has left me tearful. Happy to find meditation for this.

[wellschr]

I suffer from severe anxiety. Meditation has allowed me to get off a benzodiazepine 4 times a day. I live with severe cronic pain and living using mindfulness practices let me deal with it. Psycotherapy is a very important tool for me.

[BDBD]

I was a fan of Dr. Goleman after reading his book "The Science of Meditation" and it is such a huge pleasure to see the man talking some great stuff!!

[sanjuansteve]

@1:32 ''I don't have to believe my thoughts'' is a level of self-control that can also be applied to pain and hunger, consciously thinking that I don't have to respect the electrical signal of pain or I don't have to respect the electrical signal from my stomach we interpret as hunger.

[detailed]

The best teachers are those who explain with examples

[Enso.]

Keep Goleman and similar content up, Big Think!

[SirEveryone]

loving your approach on medidation in these last videos. thanks

[jed]

Easiest form of mindfulness—listening to good music that the lyrics are not inline with any forms of “unhelpful” thoughts of negativity—such as heartbreaks, sadness, grief, reminisce of the past, and of course—regrets or remorse.

Listen to Gospel, bossa nova, Christian or world musics, nature sounds, Zen can immediately bring you back to the present.

Or own a pet, or play with stray cats and dogs (and don’t forget to give them food if you can) may help immensely to condition your mind into a neutral (if not happier) state.

[DiscipleToki]

The depression is not me, it is a passing enemy, one I call the Void. It does not make me anything, I am me and it is something I do not embrace, an enemy of my own wellbeing. This line of thinking coupled with CBT and Meditation has had tremendous results for me personally. I live with Bipolar 2 which I lovingly refer to as Eyore syndrome.

[DrPatrickKingsep]

Another wonderful video on mindfulness and the impact it can have when practised regularly.

[kyoungd]

Meditation and exercise. Don't forget to exercise.

[priyojitroychowdhury]

Thanks a lot.It really helped me very much.

[hopree]

I'm gonna start doing loving-kindness meditation 15 mins and 5 mins mindfulness everyday.

[Leon-cdfg]

My mental health has been quite weird honestly…
Anxiety. Emetophobia. Nostalgic depression. I get anxiety in the morning, noon, and the deep nostalgic depression at night. Sometimes both of them hit at the same time and it ruins my day/appetite. Been like this for about a year and a half. I’m 17.
I feel stuck because I feel like I can’t tell anyone about this. I’m not close enough with my friends to talk to them about this. I don’t feel comfortable sharing my issues with the school councillor/teachers/police/strangers, etc. I know if I tell my mum she’ll use it against me in arguments (verbally abusive) and just put me down when she’s in a bad mood (she has very unstable mood patterns). If I tell my dad, well, he doesn’t believe in mental health issues. Once I tried to reach him little about my anxiety and he told me he has it too, but how he dealt with it was to suck it up, study hard, and it’s very obvious that he thinks he’s helping. And when he thinks he’s right, he becomes stubborn and there’s no way I can help him help me on this mental illness situation.

What bothers me the most currently is the nostalgic depression. Literally everything makes me nostalgic. Looking out the window, etc. it’s absurd. I think I miss my childhood before Covid, because that’s when quarantine began and relationships failed. Now it’s so bad because I have school and going into uni. I wish I could just be a careless child again. I wish there were no responsibilities and just friends. No loneliness. Loneliness is what I face on a day to day basis at school because I am swept up in nostalgic depression or social anxiety. I am starting to see no point in anything.

My mental health is getting worse by the day but I’m keeping my mouth shut. I just hope everything would resolve in my head. I am so desperate to tell someone in person about my struggles but no person is available to me, at least one I feel comfortable bawling my feelings out to. However there’s no one out there.

What should I do next?