4 Types of Trauma & How It Impacts Your Relationship

In this video, we explore the 4 types of trauma and how they can impact your relationships. Trauma can be caused by a variety of experiences, such as abuse, neglect, or even natural disasters. When left unaddressed, it can lead to negative patterns in our relationships. We discuss the impact of rejection trauma, abandonment trauma, betrayal trauma, and humiliation trauma on our relationships and provide tips on how to overcome the negative effects of emotional trauma or psychological trauma.

Our expert insights can help you understand the root of the problem and provide actionable steps to improve your relationships. If you're struggling with trauma and how it's affecting your relationships, this video is for you.

Researcher/Writer: Stela Košić
Editor: Caitlin McColl
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
Animator: Cristina
YouTube Manager: Cindy Cheong

REFERENCE:

[MrMshufflepuff]

The thing is severe childhood bullies and neglectful adults at school can cause these traumas too. It's not only parents. My Mom did the best she could and gave me all she could. The school is where all of my trauma comes from.

[FlawlessQueen]

Can we talk about friendship trauma especially when you are a child how your friends conditioned you to be a people pleaser for them and manipulated situations to make you look bad in front of others when you were children

[CatrinaisHere]

Being abused for all my life in many different ways, from family to friends, I feel kind of all of them.

[screamingopossum]

A lot of these can also be applied to friendships. The abandonment isn’t just parents leaving their kids behind, it’s friends ditching friends. It’s people turning you into a third wheel that ultimately breaks away. It’s people only talking to you because you’re in the same class, not because they like you.
It’s people erasing you from their existence and denying you ever played a major part.

This can go hand in hand with the pleasure love style because you don’t want them to leave. You’ll change yourself and you’ll do everything if it means they don’t leave you. It’s doing everything to avoid conflict because you think that if they get mad at you, that you’re not worthy of their love and attention.

[fiiuslair]

The rejection one is so relatable to me, I often just expect people to hate me and to eventually reject me so I very rarely approach people. And the worst is taking small things personally. It's something I wanna work on since taking small things personally is a very toxic trait that I'm not comfy with.

[LeNoir]

I thought i no longer struggle with my traumas but 🤡 it resurfaces after i get into my first and serious relationship.. good thing is, I'm aware of it so instead of running away or isolating myself completely, i stayed and deal with it. I have all these traumas thanks to my chaotic childhood, while my partner has two of these, sometimes we fought because we're isolating ourselves instead of talking about it, but we would come around and talk about it, talking about it actually helps us see that we both mean no harm, we actually accidentally hurt eachother trying to protect ourselves..

[TheMarrification]

You don't often seem to cover childhood trauma that results in keeping away from having any romantic relationships at all as an adult. It would be nice to watch that.

[sy]

Adverse childhood experiences
1. Rejection 1:23
2. Abandonment 2:56
3. Betrayal 4:31
4. Humiliation 5:48

[o.t.w.o]

Im shook. I have suffered from all of these and I'm trying to keep myself together with the weight of the reality of it. Im not just broken, im shattered. However, instead of forming toxic relationships i never had one to begin with and isolated myself from the world. My family wonders why i don't have a wife and kids yet fail to understand they wounded me in ways that hurt me and affected me to this day. Im on a journey now to growth and healing and i forgive them but man its hard biting the bullet of reality. I ran from it for so long that addressing it feels better than keep on running from it. I hope whoever reads this heals too and forgoves those who hurt you so you can grow too. 🕊️❤️

[blackjack]

Rejection Trauma. That is it! Thank you for saying to me that I`m not alone in this feeling. I feel that all the time. What can I do? I`ve ruined my previous relationship because of this. I talked to and hugged my girlfriend in the morning and in the evening I already think that she doesn`t like me anymore even though I know she is busy with her own affairs. I love her so much and I`m happy in the moments when we are together, but all the other time I strongly believe that she would be better off without me and this is driving me crazy :(

[Aan]

Timestamps
1). Rejection trauma 1:19
2). Abandonment trauma 2:54
3). Betrayal trauma 4:30
4). Humiliation trauma 5:47

Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙

[annekev.dmerwe]

Weirdly enough they all described me and highlighted some of my problems in life, i have grown so distant from my own emotions i hardly feel anything true anymore. To protect me and i have developed a coping mechanism to block out my child hood trauma to the point where i can't even remember them happening, for example i am currently 20 years old, i just found out that i witnessed my mothers miscarriage when i was 8, and when i was 6 that i ignored my mother for around 5 months after my sister came out as a still born.

[maytalacedo]

The last one really affected me as a teen since one of my siblings and my mom humiliated me on a family event one night by yelling out loud of what i like personally of my hobbies and painting it as being stupid liking those things and needed to be a proper person.

Everyone hearing that including my mom mocking me while laughing at me making fun of those things i was curious about and i genuinely liked it was so bad that i immediately run to a high empty room avoid anyone at all cost and was hurt by that.

To this day i still avoid family gatherings and getting near them because of my sister and it still triggers me whenever i go to holidays with families or my older sister. It's messed up.

[mayami]

These videos always talk about growing up with toxic parents, I would really love a video about growing up with a toxic older sibling. I love your content :)

[avidhossanmansur]

There are 5 symptoms you can find in every person who has had childhood trauma (always to a degree).

Inappropriate levels of self-esteem. usually expressed as feeling less than(others) and in some cases better than (others). depends on the circumstances. and/or swinging from one to another.

Does not have proper boundaries (internal and external). internal when it comes to others abusing you, including you abusing you. and external which prevents you from abusing others(the little Titan in you wants to hurt people for no reason).

Inability to take care of their wants and needs. some are wantless and needless, some expect others to take care of their needs, some don't want any help and do it themselves only and some confuse needs with wants.

Difficulty owning one's own reality. which means a person is not aware of how they look, how they dress, what they think, what they like, etc. It's sort of like they haven't developed an identity.

Are not able to be in moderation. everything is either black or white, drink till pass out, emotional roller coasters up and down and back around. living on the edge with no supposed balance and moderation, and lots of self-sabotage going on. (no wonder they say normal life is boring!)

this is from Pia Mellody’s work. which not a lot of people know about. I'm not sure why. if you master these from her book called “facing codependence”. you will at least have a grip on what is going on with your life.

she also breaks down actual trauma, and defence mechanisms that a child uses and then carries them into adulthood and she also tells you how to work with it.

There is no better account of childhood trauma broken down like this to the core fundamentals. you gotta work on all 5 at the same time usually. It's a long journey but It’s doable. but you have to become aware of it first. and then learn it so you can explain it to others like I just did! I have learned it's true that what you learn you have to practice and preach. and knowing how to teach someone else, might actually mean that you have learned it yourself.

Thanks for the rea have a good day.

[Rain-iexm]

I know I have childhood trauma, that I'm still as a teenager, working trhough, but I've never realized how much it actually affects my behaviour. i relate almost too much to many of these, and I am only now starting to realize things. thank you, psych2go for helping people like me understand themselfes<3

[chatoui]

For a while i didnt exactly know what kind of trauma i might have suffered at my mom's house as it wasent often talked about and was pretty specific, but i feel lile betrayal really describes it well. Ive been acused of lying multiple times by my mom and mostly step dad even thought i didnt lie and this made me develop some sort of complex about truth and lies. Thanks for talking about these sorts of thing!

[emraldembrace]

I feel like I needed this video.

I haven’t experienced childhood trauma, no; my family loves me and I have so many people who care and support me, yet two rejections of love (one brutally crushing me) have made me feel like I don’t deserve a living relationship. And it doesn’t help the amount of stories that I have heard about people who have been in long relationships, who felt truly loved, yet were cheated on or heard that they aren’t loved. I fear that I don’t deserve a happy relationship. I fear he won’t want me, which I know if that happens I should move on, but I have these fears even though we’ve only been dating for around 3 weeks. He’s the first person I’ve dated, so maybe it’s the newness that makes me nervous. I just worry that he will get tired of me or that during college he will want someone else or that he will control me, even though he’s only been supportive and understanding. We are open, or at least that’s what it seems to be, but I still fear for the worst.

I love him, I really do.

[pfchan]

One thing I’m struggling with right now, is to accept that my parents aren’t the same people they were ten years ago. And that I’m worth of all their support and all of the friendships I currently have. They’ve both changed so much after I left for college, that now that I spend time with them my mind makes it so hard to get along because I expect all of those old behaviors to come back. It makes me feel like a child throwing a tantrum, because I always expect the worst and I’m taking everything my parents say too personal when it’s not a big deal. Therapy has helped, but I’m wondering if a I’ll ever get better…. I don’t want to be alone the rest of my life.

[kimberlymill]

I don't know if it is a detail on purpose or not, but I am really grateful that in the shown relationship, the taller person ist the one who has trauma and needs help.
Most of the time it is always the smaller person who only gets comfort by the the taller person.
Thank you ❤