Grieving Your Cat, Dog or Any Other Animal Family Member - Tips, Tools and My Story.

Grieving the loss of your cat or another animal family member?

Experiencing the loss of an animal family member is a singular type of pain, oftentimes made even worse as that pain is marginalized by other people in our lives. In this video I'll tell you about my journey living with grief, honoring life and lessons I've learned with the help of a professional in the field. Grief doesn't have to mean suffering in silence; Leaning on our community and the power of ritual can help incorporate loss into life.

0:00 Introduction
0:54 Jackson's Loss
2:40 Grief and it's Misconceptions
5:19 Living with Grief
6:40 The Story of Rudy

If you or someone you know is dealing with the
loss of an animal loved one, and would like to
know more about Stephanie Rogers’ work,
please visit:

For more insight to living with, and saying goodbye, to cats - check out my book Cat Daddy

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[artv]

I'm a 43 yr old man and my 18 yr old cat just passed away a few days ago. I was not expecting to have this hard of a time. I really don't remember the last time I was this sad. She was the friendliest most amazing cat and I miss my little buddy.

[jbyrd]

My cat Fletcher died unexpectedly on Saturday. I was having coffee and he went out into the catio to do his morning surveillance. I heard a little noise, got up to see what was happening and found him dead - I assume from heart failure. He was only 10, I am 70, and expected we would go out together in a few years time. We had been together abt 15 months - he was an older FIV positive rescue cat who bought so much affection, joy and mischief into my life. I am very sad and missing him badly, but so grateful for the love we shared. 🐈‍⬛💚😊

[bruh.]

The hardest part is when you see your beloved pet in every corner where he/she used to be and you just miss him/her.
Just lost my best buddy to a dog attack I couldn't stay at my house so I went to my boyfriend house for 2 days because I felt so alone without him.

[midnightwolfsister]

I lost my 20 year old cat today I am 14 so he has been there my entire life, I love him mich I can’t imagine life without him I have been crying all day

[rachelcarter]

"it's just a pet" is a horrible phrase. thank you for this. disenfranchised greif ...such a perfect phrase...much needed

[tinkermi]

I cried more when I lost my cat, my companion of 21 years more than I cried for anyone in my life. It's been almost a year, and I still cry.

[Hey.This.Is.Stuart]

My cat has sadly passed away tonight…I needed to hear this to help with the grief.

[tomlangdon]

Thank you. I lost my beautiful cat Buddy 5 days ago. She was everything to me. 19 1/2 years of unconditional love, constant companionship, my best friend and little girl. I’m shattered. Completely. This video gave me some comfort and understanding.

[horsegirlb]

*I just have a couple things to add. I've been a mortician at a large emergency animal hospital where we get a couple dozen euthanasias a day. Spent 6 months working exclusively in the morgue, performing what we call aftercare which is getting the deceased pet ready for either cremation or burial. Here's what I've noticed:*

1. "You are not alone" is an important feeling I try to impress upon people during our brief encounter. Usually I say "we've all been there" because obviously the staff of an animal hospital has all lost plenty of pets. But also our hospital offers a pet loss support group, so *if you need something like that or a grief counselor your vet should be able to point you in the right direction.*

2. People grieve in a variety of weird ways and there's nothing wrong with any of them. Normal stuff in the morgue is collecting ink or clay paw prints, fur clippings, or prepping the body for a viewing which is basically a small wake in the exam room. Some people spend hours with their pet, some can't stand to look at them. One asked for whisker clippings to put into a necklace. My dad wanted to have our pet stuffed. One requested I close the pet's eyes while I worked. Some get mad, lots of people cry. Some appear stone cold. *It doesn't really matter how your grief manifests - your feelings are valid, and chances are there's someone else grieving in a way weirder way than you are. Which makes it all pretty normal actually.*

3. It's super obvious you loved your pet. Even if you couldn't afford to give them everything you wanted, we can always tell within seconds. Your pet knows you loved them too. Even for those who can't stand to be in the room while they're put to sleep, we stay in the room with them and honestly call down the hallway to find more people to come pet the animal and tell them how much their owner loved them. *They know you loved them, you don't have to worry about that.* They had a whole lifetime of seeing you show it.

[RobloxPDfiredept]

I lost my cat Mario today. I’ve been crying for 9 hours straight, he had kidney failure and cancer, we had to let him go because he was in so much pain. I was feeling his little heartbeat, hugging and kissing him, then his heart stopped beating and he went to the rainbow bridge. I’ll never forget the way he would just climb onto your belly and purr, and fall asleep. He was an absolute gem, and a gift from God. I’ll miss him so much. 😭

[k.cherry]

Idk who needs to hear this but here's how I'm dealing with my cat's passing. She passed away five months ago, she was my whole life so I haven't been the same ever since and I know I probably will never be the same, nevertheless I planted a tree where she's buried and that has been oddly comforting, that way I feel like she lives through the tree. I take care of the tree and even talk to it sometimes, just like I would do with her. I know people around me think I'm crazy for talking to a tree but it's the only way I can move on when I miss her.

[JohnnyUtah]

Much love brother. Just lost my cat, had to make the decision to put him to sleep. I’m a multiple time combat veteran, I cried my eyes out and my heart is broken. I rescued him but he actually rescued me with his love. I’ll miss him dearly. I sincerely hope I gave him a good life.

[christinekoehler]

Yes!! I was so sad when my first cat died, I called off work because I was non stop crying, and my boss said, "it's not like your grandma died"!!!! I was so mad! There is no respect for my boss now!!! Please grieve! It's so important! And don't feel bad about it! She was my best friend!

[melwilson]

I really want to add something to this that no one ever tells you about grief: The 7 steps of grief don't happen in order, and in fact you may find yourself bouncing back and forth between them. And that's ok. I lost my kitty Tuna in 2020, and then almost exactly one year later lost my husband in 2021. I'm still grieving both of them and to hell with anyone who tells me to "get over it". There are really no set rules to grieving and we all should be more accepting and able to talk about it. Thank you for this video and I'm so sorry for your losses.

[kellyg]

My 8 month old kitten passed away a few days ago from FIP. It was devastating and the grief is so raw right now. He was amazing. He broke all the cat stereotypes. He'd run down the stairs to greet me when I came home from work, follow me around the house, we'd talk to each other and he'd snuggle up to me when I'd go to sleep. He'd wake me up by licking my nose. Bedtime is the hardest because that's when I really feel his absence. God I miss him.

[MEGR]

Lost my 15 yr old 3 days ago. Miss him terribly. I tried to keep my composure, but they gave us a private room with the body, and I held him and lost it. I was with him all the way, even as they put him down.

[lovelylily]

I cried nonstop through this video. I lost my baby girl 10 days ago, she was almost 18 years old and I don’t remember life without her. Thank you so much Jackson. Many people don’t understand how hard it is to lose a pet.

[speedwayaudio]

When my Maggie got sick and passed, I cried like a little girl. I'm a full grown 56-year-old man who is as tough as they come, but my Maggie was my only soft spot.

[colleen]

"You carry the love. You carry the loss." I would add to that: "You carry the love again." For every animal that I adopt, my love for that animal is amplified by the love for all the animals that came before.

[fi]

I often feel like saying goodbye to a pet can be harder than saying goodbye to a human loved one.

Pets love you unconditionally and are always there for you, I had to say goodbye to one of our cats a couple years ago and it hit me so hard when he was gone. I would even go as far to say it hit me harder than when my dad passed away, often, the bond you have with your pets is incredibly strong and you don't realize it until they're gone.