AITA for giving away my BFs birthday gift when he said he couldn’t come? Dusty Reads & Reacts!

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AITA for giving away my bfs birthday gift when he said he couldn’t come?

#storytime #redditstories #storyreaction #voiceover #asconscale #aita

[brooklynstafford]

This is how I see it too. The manipulation with the “people pleasing” comment so she does what he wants bothers me too

[bethwoodward]

the boyfriend is giving off major AH vibes to me. Sure, arguably OP should have told him she planned to give the ticket to someone else. But he had already told her he wasn’t going to be available. And then he went to see the band elsewhere. So OP gave the ticket to a friend. And then boyfriend manipulated her into rescinding the offer by calling her a “people pleaser” (which, no, it’s just common courtesy not to take stuff back once you give it to someone) and then rejecting her compromise of giving the friend both tickets so they could do something else together even though *he’s already seen the band.* This whole thing is setting off red flags to me.

[Draxxdemsklounst]

What if his schedule changes again and he can't go by the time the day comes? 😂

[_up_moon]

I disagree with the boyfriend's alienation of the friend because of his fickle schedule. Hes isolating hwr and destroying her friendships out of selfishness. I hope she breaks up with him

[lynnegreen]

There was /is a third option. OP doesn't go, and her friend and BF go to the concert. And OP clears out the BF's things from her home while they are at the concert, because the manchild doesn't respect her at all.

[TrishasMotorhomeMadness]

The people pleaser comment is what made him the ah he is manipulating her to get his own way after he already turned down the ticket he’s a douche bag

[mleighqs]

NTA, I don't think op has done anything wrong. His schedule changed and she made other plans plain as that. Plus, he's already has a chance to see the artist on his own saying that if it had been him in her shoes he said he would have went without her anyway. As for the update, boy friend is showing how much of a child he is by making her change her plans to please him knowing it's going to put his girl friend in a weird spot. All I picture of him is a big baby whining "But it's my birthday".

[merlinathrawes]

Damned if you do and damned if you don't. But his schedule changed unpredictably once again, something neither of you have any control over. But as you pointed out, HE has gotten to see the group/artist. I do think you need to get him a decent replacement birthday gift (I'm sure the show is sold out), but take the gf.
Personally, I think OP now owes the friend a decent replacement gift, a little more than a dinner.

[auntlynnie]

OP could have explained from the start that if boyfriend's work schedule changed again, she'd have to rescind; that the offer was contingent upon boyfriend being away for work.

[Goblue]

Op isn’t an asshole originally but her taking back the ticket from the new person yes definitely asshole .boyfriend wanted both and is unreasonable

[ivylovesrunning]

The boyfriend sucks. OP, your friend is better for you than this guy.

[biblioholic]

I feel like the gift should have been replaced as soon as she knew he couldn't use it, then it's just an extra ticket she has and not his birthday gift anymore or it was his gift and therefore his choice what to do with the ticket, not hers. However at this point OP should have given her own ticket to the friend and let bf decide if he wants to go without her or do something different with her if she wanted to avoid being an AH. BF is kind of an AH for insisting they go to the concert instead of letting her not be an AH to the friend when he has already seen the show. Also what happens if his schedule changes again and he's back to unavailable? I also think the wonky scheduling is sus and it might be time to verify that it's industry or company standard.

[analyticalchick]

She shouldn't have bought tickets when she knows he has a fickle schedule

[michellenowlin]

Other way around i would totally understand

[Tabby-ts]

She could have talked to bf first about it but I believe he would have asked her to rescind anyway. Look, he already saw the group, and recently. She had no issue with him going. Why could he not show the same deference?

[D-Dollie]

OP needs to get bf a replacement birthday gift and she and her new friend go to the concert.

[anakaliaeastwood]

I get both sides. He said he wasn't going, so you could argue that no further discussion was necessary. The girl was super excited and will presumably be super disappointed if her invite is rescinded. OP is clearly a considerate person. People pleaser? Not enough info. to say either way.

The gift was for him, so prioritizing the feelings of a girl she barely knows over his looks especially funky. Maybe she IS a people pleaser.

I hope they work it out.

[Draxxdemsklounst]

I think she should have just gotten something else for her boyfriend at that point. And plan for this sort of thing in the future.

[ladylauraanne]

NTA. The Boyfriend really is though. He was able to see them without OP. He's being entitled. OP would be a jerk if she took it back from her friend.

[HuntingForHannah]

Communication issue here, but he went to see them when he was away, so makes OP less of an ascon feels like an esh. She could get another gift instead.