how to master DETACHMENT: how to stop caring about other people, cut toxicity out, & stay unbothered

and follow @thedaybydayco on IG to stay up to date and join the fam for exclusive perks! 🤍 how to master detachment, stop caring about what other people think, get rid of toxic people in your life, how to be unbothered, and be the best version of yourself, validate yourself. start living for you, change your life and get rid of anxious attachment.

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tags~
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timecodes:
0:00 - intro
0:36 - become self aware
1:37 - would you stay detached in these scenarios
2:51 - why do we feel the need to impress others
4:26 - why people are toxic
5:44 - stop taking things personally
6:06 - basing your self-worth from others
6:20 - find your own self-worth
7:30 - opinions are not a fact
8:30 - stop tripping over haters
9:55 - control your emotions
10:53 - your time and energy is precious
12:10 - stop overthinking
12:20 - your inner roommate
13:02 - prove to yourself first
13:25 - value those who value you
14:04 - get comfortable with discomfort

[lenalifts]

HI MY LOVES ❤ if you have any topics you want me to cover in my next self-help talking video please comment them hehe okie love you all so so much :)

[Alia-Ke]

As someone who deals with annoying social anxiety that literally ruined my life this video is needed because I don't have that much friends I am afraid of loosing and I would do whatever it takes to keep them close. This video is so inspiring thanks lena ❤

[yarielavillarreal]

I needed to hear this. I found out that all my work “friends” hangout outside of work or even all of them ordering food together during lunch I never get asked if I want to order something. I won’t lie I feel really lonely and bothers me, I feel left out kinda hurt and it would really take up my whole day. So I needed to hear this tbh because I just need to do me for now on 😊

[MorganVenn]

I love THIS because people's actions towards you are NOT a reflection of your worth and I had to remind myself that again and again (still sometimes do) before it made me stop caring as much

[rebeccaly]

I’m someone who obsesses over other people’s perceptions of me and I overthink too much. I really appreciate this video. You spoke so much truth. Thank you for these really good reminders ❤

[michaelperfect]

I was literally thinking about detachment today !! It’s a journey but let me tell you, life has been easier since detaching. All the scenarios you mentioned happened to me and I learned from it.Please continue those type of videos 🌟🌷 love the self development videos❤️

[JadaVlogs]

The four scenarios are exactly what I've got through and frustrated by for my entire life lol. Every single word she brought here is probably what I needed to care way earlier. Thank you for awakening me with your ultimate advice ♡

[HieuNguyen-zfie]

Wow, she is speaking right to me. This is what I'm going through.

It hurts so much when people are ghosting and toxic

[mahahabib]

The worst thing is not when people hate on you… the worst is when people are INDIFFERENT they just don’t care about your existence

[camerabsessedx]

this is one of the things I struggle most with! a lot of the friendships ive had in my life have been very toxic where they treat me poorly or walk all over me and I wouldnt say or do anything about it, i'd just take it. now im like NO not anymore, once I start noticing those signs in people im quick to drop them cause I know I dont need that energy or negativity in my life! thank you for sharing this lena, your videos are always so helpful!

[Txgirl-ttym]

When my husband & I met our 1st encounter was not good. We did not like each other & guess we just got off the wrong foot. Thankfully, I started working where he worked & we realized we really did like each other. Here we are happily married 28 years later. Definitely taught me that sometimes you have to give a person a second chance. BTW great video & I am so happy you found your confidence.

[alexaskye]

Ahhh STOP DOING WHATEVER YOUR DOING LENA POSTED

[emanuelaenache]

idk what it is but i love just listening to you like i found your channel 2 hours ago but everything you say makes me feel productive so ive just been playing your videos in the background for the past 2 hours and ive done all my homework like i feel so guilty clicking off and going on socials.But fr i love your advice love you so muchh

[tehilahodjegba]

I think for me, the problem is that I'm a very empathetic person and I feel things very deeply. So, even when my friends or family would sit me down and have a talk with me, they'd aways have to start with – "Now, don't take this personally..." But, upon hearing that, I already knew that I would take it personally. It doesn't mean that I would go out on a rampage and start deflecting or denying what they have to say about me. I know that they're all coming from a place of genuine love and understanding... so, I would sit there and listen with interest as they aired their opinions and gave me advice.

However, for some reason I'd just feel it more deeply. In my head, I'm thinking: "It's not that deep Tehilah, these people are your family, they're your friends, there's no need to feel this kind of way. They only say these things so that you can be more self-aware and work on yourself". I'd just be silent and listen, then when they're done, I'd chew myself up about it later. My brain and heart would go into an all out never-ending war as to 'Why I even care that much?' OR 'Why I don't care enough?'. Y'know?

So, when you mentioned some of the scenarios that you've been in... surprisingly, I found myself being completely unbothered in all of them. Because, YES! I do want to have friends and form close connections with people and have strong relationships with individuals that I can absolutely be my-completely-authentic true self with. But, NO! I won't just bulldoze or force myself to befriend people that don't even like me for me or pretend to at least. I know when I'm not needed, because I can sense those kinds of things from a mile away.

And regarding the topic of ghosting people, I really only do this to people that can't take a hint. Because, tell me even after I've OVER– explained myself, you still feel the NEED to try and make it seem as though something is wrong with me? So, sometimes I just don't even say anything anymore. I mean I hate being ghosted as much as the next person, but it just sends the message faster. 😃😃😃

[ShelbyMontana-ychq]

Just came here to say how much I love your content. I feel like a lot of people who post self help stuff really do not understand how it feels to try and do this when you struggle with mental health disorders like depression or anxiety. Thank you for being so real ❤

[shivanipatel]

Ooh Lena flexing that already fully developed frontal lobe at 23😤 So thoughtful of you to share those vulnerable hurtful moments you’ve experienced with others I am sure it will resonate with many.

[AnnaKwonda]

Love this!! Thank you! Also, “I’m 23 yo… bc I still feel so young.” Omg girl. That’s because you ARE. Enjoy it. Hit your 30s, 40s, and so on, you’ll regret thinking you were old at 23 😆

[NanditaPrasad-rm]

Your words make me feel so much better about myself and I am really grateful to have discovered you at such a time when life feels like you dont have someone to rely on.
Thank you so much for all the advice you give and keep doing what you are doing

[mariaab]

I am currently dealing with constant anxiety and overthinking due to a friend I thought was my ride or die and honestly you made me realize in 15 min how I'm really just giving away my time to people that don't even deserve it and the fact that feeling like my friends don't like me is really a me thing, I don't like myself enough nor do I respect me. Thank you so much! feels like I just had the most real conversation possible with a friend 💜

[michellejungg]

the way you are able to rationalise this and break it down into different parts was so helpful and easy to understand. i feel so empowered by your words!! ily you absolute queen