7 Not-So-Good Byproducts of Black and White Thinking

At times, each of us can become enamored with our sense of correctness, prompting the use of and white thinking. Psychotherapist Dr. Les Carter describes how opinions and interpretations are fine, but that there are always going to be unexpected circumstances that challenge the appropriateness of hard, unbending obligations. By identifying 7 byproducts of black and white thinking, you will be encouraged to learn how to maneuver through inevitable differences and imperfections.

Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who lives in Dallas, Tx. In the past 40 years he has conducted over 60,000 counseling sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder.

[jcronin]

No sensationalism, no incessant stream of adverts, just beautiful knowledge derived from experience which encourages a neccessary and healthy dose of independent thinking.
Dr C is a rear jewel in a web of nonsense.

[dianeg]

This is such a great lesson for me. An “Ah-ha” moment. I was raised in a similar environment where things were black and white, right and wrong, my way or the highway. I wasn’t allowed to have an identity of my own and wasn’t accepted by my parents unless I thought, walked, talked and dressed as my parents dictated. This was my first experience with narcissism

[rabarberellum]

I’m always amazed how you can pinpoint my flaws without offending me and making me enthusiastic of trying to do a bit better

[DrNancyLivingCoCreatively]

Going into grad school I was asked if I could handle grey areas. I didn't know but I did learn...I hope. Had a male tell me recently I should be able to handle his moods ..this after he had exploded unexpectedly. Took me days to get out of my nervous system. I tried to discuss. He denied and blamed me though the conversation was about politics not me...I learned he does not seem able to discuss. Eggshells indeed

[stuartpierce]

It's really hard when loved one's have such black and white thinking.
Thanks Dr. Les. Jennifer 😊👍

[Nancy-ywrr]

Most of life operates in the gray, but narcs try to push everything to the extremes. Everything and everyone is either good or bad, right or wrong.

[brightphoebesays]

My Dad was like that. Very uninterested in my perspective and interests. Very defensive. He would shut down when something went against his thinking, and he would shut that person out. I always wanted to connect with him, and to heal him too, to forgive him before he died. I do forgive him. And I love that grouchy, frightened old man's spirit.

[MsNevermore]

Gus is so zen that one time I was looking for him and didn't immediately see him. Then I realized that I mistook him for a cushion! He blends in so perfectly with his chair lol.

[AgendaInMind]

I have been watching your narcissism channel for months and had no idea this one existed! Please mention both channels in your videos so more can learn from you. You are invaluable!!!

[doveschrist]

Dr. Carter, I mostly agree with what you have said in this short video, however I do believe that there needs to be an emphasis on drawing some boundaries with individuals that you may disagree in their choice of lifestyle especially if they are destructive to your personal lifestyle choices.There still can be compromise in Oder to have a relationship but that doesn’t mean that you have to agree with them. You can agree to disagree without compromising your core beliefs that are healthy to you in your relationship with some individuals in your life especially family. If you haven’t already done a video on this subject please do one and thanks for your insightful instructions. I agree that there is a grey zone.

[Gigi-zz]

I always remember what one of my professor’s told us. He told us to make certain that we remember his next statement because many in life do not. Many people think in terms of black and white. Groups and mass mobs think in terms of black and white thinking. However, life is mostly in the gray area. Your video reminds me of this statement. It has served me well. 🌿💜🌿 Happy Easter, Dr. Carter.

[wifferste]

Add "I'm sure" to point #1. I hear that a lot. My other favorite form of black-white thinking (or binary thinking) is for those who group others into two categories: those who think like and agree with me and deplorables.

[azsuehayes]

Sometimes you make me want to cry because of your wisdom. Much gratitude for your generous wisdom. ❤🤗🙏🏼

[emilybaird]

After listening I have decided to be willing to think in the gray. Never thought I would say that.

[martilyn]

This info is perfect for obtaining balance in life. When I learned from you about narcissist characteristics I noticed I had a couple of these tendencies myself. This video gives tools for me to work on these characteristics. Thank you Dr C.

[edsparky]

Dr. Les = a truly loving and intelligent person ... Thank you !!!

[bhhNC]

Idea: When at the point of exasperation, in a dysfunctional group containing a toxic narcissist - in the South - when the narcissist expresses something awful about someone, sigh gently and murmur "Come now, Lord Jesus..." just loud enough to be heard by the group.

[constancebarrett]

Yes yes yes yes all the above! I'm striving for the grey area. Thanks dr c for your help and love you gus.🐕

[G.G.GG]

Excellent advice to self-check for. Thank you.
Gus was looking at you like, "He's talking to himself again. I'm really worried about him."

[vanessapehl]

Awesome Dr. Carter let's learn from each other...