Why Trauma Survivors Don't Feel Safe Feeling Happy |CPTSD Recovery

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Why Trauma Survivors Don't Feel Safe Feeling Happy |CPTSD Recovery

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[AthenaVelecta]

I struggle so much with this. When I started feeling good or happy growing up my mother would make something up that I had supposedly done or been thinking to punish me for. I learned that happiness equaled punishment. Like feeling happy is sick, evil and sinful and I will go to hell for feeling that way.

[averygoodwitch]

yes, yes, yes That is exactly how I feel

[pontifixmax]

For me, feeling happy feels like being deluded, as if I'm failing to be on guard and prepared for the next horrible thing that's going to happen. I have experienced horrible things in my life, from emotional, physical, and sexual abuse in childhood and adolescence, and numerous critical incidents and life-threatening events in adulthood. That said, paying attention and being prepared for the worst has served me well in terms of getting through things and staying alive. Its a skill set I don't want to lose, but it doesn't allow me to be happy. Honestly, I don't know if it's possible to have both.

[georgeweller]

Yes our brains created an association between happiness and danger because this was the literal reality of the world around us. What frustrates me is that you automatically assume that this reality isn’t true anymore. The world is inherently unsafe. It’s cruel and unkind and unfair. We barely have to take any risks at all to find situations that will reinforce the very real need for this association. Happiness IS dangerous.