How to Accept an Autism Diagnosis

It's Autism Acceptance Month in April, and I'd like to share my own personal journey of accepting my son's Autism diagnosis. This is a difficult conversation that we all should have, to help make this world a better place for our kiddos.

I'd love to hear about your journey of accepting an Autism diagnosis, please write in our comments below.
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[mugenmaster]

I was diagnosed at 2 years old and was revealed to me when I was your sons age actually, around 13 or so. It was a pretty difficult transition, but at the same time. I was curious to learn more about it. Fast forward to 32 now and I’m a Musician using my autism skills to help reverse the social stigmas that many of us Autistics deal with. My Mom sure did cry when the news came about my disability, but she was such a strong soldier and held her composure to keep loving me regardless of who I was. I pray often for all those parents that are either starting on their journey with their autistic child or much later on. That they will have hope that their son/daughter will someday do great and amazing things one day.

[thevintagelover]

As an autistic young woman at 27, i feel for all parents who’s kids has been diagnosed with autism, my parents has had their struggles in understanding autism, they were as scared and sad as you, they tried to do their best to raise me well, and to be independent. It hasn’t been without ups and down of course, but i feel like i’ve been taught well how to face the ordinary world, to be an adult, to be independent, and to make decisions on my own.

I know that not all autistic people are the same, and not all autistic people will be as independent as some autistic people like me, but it’s important to never give up on your children. Take one day at a time, use mindfulness as much as possible, stay in the present moment, be there for your children as much as possible, and be patient with them. Some autistic people may not be able to work ordinary, but that shouldn’t matter to you, what’s important is your respect, love and accept.

PS: I hard times accepting my autism as well, since i have a low self esteem, and a little depression(i also have anxiety which i haven’t been diagnosed for, but i do highly believe i have, since i’ve heard you can have a second diagnose when you have autism)recently, but i’m working on boosting it, and accepting myself for the challenges i have. The 4:59 part hit me, cause my mom had these thoughts as well, she and my dad had literally the same worries and concernes as you.😢
Well i don’t wanna focus on what the future brings, what will happen if my parents die, and what else will happen in life, i will fully focus on taking one day at a time, and be in the present moment, the future has it’s own worries, and fortunately for me i have a great community i can go to. One thing for sure is that i don’t wanna be married or have kids, that’s for sure.

All hugs and love from me to you and all parents who’s children has just been diagnosed with autism, God bless you❤❤❤

[Gabriel]

Hello guys. I was diagnosed Asperger as an adult, and might say that even if any of you guys come to a diagnosis, it does not mean that you cannot or your child cannot succeed. I am 25 yo, living in Brazil. I work as software developer, graduated, currently trying to get my master in physics and am married. I am not saying that everything is possible to anyone: everyone has their own difficulties. However the diagnosis is not a final destination or fate per say.
I hope that you guys have a nice journey as I am having even with your own hardships :)

[ninaa]

I had an emotional breakdown tonight before coming across this video. I’m so tired and felt useless to my son for not understanding his needs this evening. He became so upset that he threw everything on the floor including his food and had a long meltdown. My son is nearly 3 years old. He’s nonverbal, only eats nuggets and drinks pediasure and even those things are a struggle. He has ABA and OT and is going to daycare 3 times a week to socialize but I sometimes feel so discouraged and have fears about his future 😢

[justtania]

It took me 3 year, 31kgs and alot of tears to "accept it" .. it's not that I ever rejected it, it was just the fear of the future, his functional capacity and what that might look like 🥺 I'm alot happier now but the worry will never fully go away I don't think

[sylhetimominamerica]

My son was diagnosed with autism when he was 2. Now he is 4 years old but the the fear is still here. Like how my son will going to face this world. You said so much word from your heart. But I feel like the word you said I can't express to other. The felling is same. I can feel it.

[alleysouza]

Once I’ve got in touch with the actual autistic community and was able to see that my son is just like a whole bunch of people out there, and the problem is not him but rather a society that expects humans to be like factory made robots, I not only accepted but fully embraced it.

My son doesn’t have a ‘speech delay’, his speech is developing in a different way, it’s called Gestalt language development.

My son doesn’t have socialising problems, he gets along perfectly well with other autistic kids.

Most of the problems that my son have doesn’t come from his autism but rather from living in a world that wants to force him to fit in, but was born to Stand Out!

[jemdrop]

3:45 mark. You have me in tears. I feel so alone on this journey. But just hearing you say that you get me makes me feel better. I am grieving. I am angry. I just want to get through this so I can be the strongest me I can be for my daughter. Everyone in our family is in denial. And keep saying “nothing is wrong with her” and it keeps pushing me further and further into the darkness every time I have to justify and explain her actions and the spectrum. It’s so hard. I’m so so so sad. I’m trying to get through this. I feel like I’ve been mourning since we started this whole process. Sometimes it’s hard for me to stop and realize I’m more than just her parent now - I’m her caretaker.

[Traceydiag]

I just want to thank you. I discovered your channel 2/3 years ago at a time when my son was just being diagnosed. Even though I could see the signs and had experience working with children with special needs, it was still a hard pill to swallow. Your channel helped me so much and it has been lovely to see the growth. I’ve come so far and I now embrace my son’s autism and love him for who he is. It has been such a hard journey but I’m so glad I found your channel all those years ago.

[jensmith]

We just got our diagnosis for my daughter tonight. Your words were so comforting😢 Thank you

[digiscream]

One important thing to remember, I think, is that our kids are growing up in a very different world to the one we saw. When I was born, in the 70s, an autism diagnosis was a life sentence of being seen as nothing more than a collection of symptoms and deficiencies, reinforcing a conviction that you'll never be "normal". Nowadays...even from the last five years, it's _very_ different and the world is a much more tolerant place. My mother had to teach me how to mask to the point where I passed for NT for 40+ years in order to avoid that sentence (as did her mother before her), but the strain of that began to show more and more and I was diagnosed last year. What I've found since then is...people are actually pretty accepting now, if we can communicate in some way that we're different and they can help by making minor adjustments. Not only that, but they actually seem to feel good about it (I don't fully understand why, but hey...goes with the gig) if we give them a chance to help in a small way.

So...try not to worry too much about the future. Yes, his life will probably look quite different to the NT life you've enjoyed, but it won't necessarily be a disaster either, and people generally do want to help even if they've never met him before...that doesn't change as soon as he's not a cute kid any more. The other important part is...there are a _lot_ of us out there, far more than anybody realises. Roughly one in 60-70 people, in fact, and while none of us have exactly his presentation...we all know bits of what his world looks like from the inside. He's got a community, and it's a _really_ supportive one. When it's time, and he finds that community, that'll be a huge step forward for him :)

[moniqueappell]

Cried through the whole thing, this is exactly how we feel. Perfectly worded. We love your channel, thank you for make me feel less alone. ❤

[emmaspiers]

Thank you, I have a 2 year old with speech delay and he sensory seeks all day. No diagnosis yet but it’s clear to me he his so different to a typical child. The progression with your son keeps me very hopeful in this lonely time.

[whitneymason]

Thank you! I really hate when people invalidate our feelings. We all process things at a different pace! 💞

[dominiquegordon]

Thank you Tara!! For giving me the guts to share my story with my 2.5 yr old son. I've gotten a little more comfortable with sharing. So thank


However, Today was different especially the fact that it was Easter and I knew that my son had sensory overload and was stimming more than usual this wkd. So we stayed home.

So accepting that some days may be harder than others is understandable.

Blessings to you and your family

[EliPriest]

We got our son's diagnosis just last week, three days after he was expelled from school for 'bad behaviour'. I'm terrified for his future. I hope one day we get to where you are.

[sherridenise]

I feel this completely. My son was diagnosed at 17 months and he's two now and he is still non-verbal. I still have so many people saying oh he will be fine. He's fine. Finding this video and seeing someone who understands exactly what I'm going through with my son. 💙

[brookecherithogwuche]

Thank you, we just got our Autism diagnosis last week and my little girl turned 4. It’s always hard especially when you have other little ones to worry about but your video gives me hope

[emanal-ghamdi]

My son was diagnosed 3 weeks ago and I am still trying to process it. He is 3 years old and I’m 34 weeks pregnant and trying to help him is a lot of work mentally and physically.

Plus I’m scared that the baby is going to have it too 😢

I love your channel ❤ it’s definitely giving all ASD moms hope and guidance. Thank you

[Kiddly]

hugs I have autism myself sometimes the best thing to remember is this that you are doing your best and you are your child's mom and dad. Also remember this that it is ok to be upset and scared about autism. I was 24 when I got my diagnosis, but I remember as a kid my parents treated me no different than any other kids.