20 Tips for Navigating Life After a Late Autism Diagnosis

Hi! I'm Orion Kelly and I'm Autistic. On this video I explore the topic of life after a late autism diagnosis. Plus, I share my personal lived experiences as an #actuallyautistic person. #orionkelly #autism #asd #autismsigns #whatautismfeelslike

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ABOUT ORION:
Orion Kelly is an #ActuallyAutistic vlogger (YouTuber), podcaster, radio host, actor, keynote speaker and Autistic advocate based in Australia. Orion is all about providing validation and support for Autistic people and their loved ones.

#AutisticVoices #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Autism #OrionKelly #ThatAutisticGuy #ASD

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⛔️*Disclaimer: The videos contained on this channel are for general education and entertainment purposes only and do not constitute professional advice. For professional advice and training seek assistance from a qualified provider. All views are my own and do not represent those of my employers or sponsors. Some images used are stock images.*⛔️

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[WorthlessDeadEnd]

For all my life, I have said that I don't know what is wrong with me, but I have always known that I am not normal. My parents love me, but they don't know how to help me. I've been diagnosed with major depressive disorder for over twenty years, but I really don't feel depressed most of the time. I *_have, _* however, always felt "defective", a burden to society, and broken. So that is most likely where the depression comes from. Knowing that I cannot change myself, my condition, the way I think, or how I navigate through life is so depressing and defeating, but knowing that I am most likely autistic has given me a reason to live (it's not the only reason, but I'll take as many as I can get). It's not that I *_want_* to be autistic. I just want the same thing my parents have always wanted for me: *Answers.* And I have begun to find them here in this community. I remember pouring my heart out to my grandmother a year before she died about how hopeless I felt, and how I saw myself and life in general. I can still see her bowing her head, slowly shaking it, and saying, _"I don't know about you."_ Like she had given up on me, though the signs were always there. We just didn't know how to recognize them. What dreams and wishes she may have had for me, died, and she was mourning them. And I am okay with that, because we don't know what we don't know. We can't help not knowing something that we just don't know. 🤷‍♂ That is why I believe it is so crucial to properly educate society on autism. And that is why I am grateful to this community and will continue to support it.

[jakke]

When you're an AuDHD'er, routine is so hard to implement. Without it, you get deregulated and with it, you get so frustrated from not going after what your brain needs at that moment. It's an internal battle that never stops.
I have learned to live without the routine but I don't think the world around me has. Either way, it's just so messed up and causing so much anxiety and depression.

[shellystewart]

After my grandson was diagnosed, all of my “quirks” and “ strong willed child “ labels all make sense! Wow! I’m 53 now. Wow! Life changing! I finally understand me!

[ladyamalthea]

I've been so lonely my entire life, even when I'm with my loved ones.

[hayleyball]

I've just been diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. It was such a relief but at the same time I also felt angry. The diagnosis has explained so much about my life and struggles. School and work have been such a battle for me and now I feel I've been left to figure this out on my own. Thank God for channels like yours, they are life savers! I have got by in life on my own but really I've always needed support especially in the work place. I'm 48 years old!😕

[wendyfollett]

Dying with laughter about finding autistic community! I figured out about a year ago that I'm autistic and I'm just waiting on my formal diagnosis. I decided that I needed to tell my adult kids about everything. The results were not quite what I expected. 3 out of 4 all said that they were! I have about 5 autistic grandchildren and 2 of my children have married partners who are autistic! This explains why I mostly only socialise with my family. I bred my own autistic community over the last 45 years!😅

[helenhill]

Great video! Thank you. I turn 60 next month and was diagnosed autistic a few weeks ago. Struggling with some family members and friends who don’t believe that I’m autistic - like it’s something we’d make up or actually want, when we all crave to just fit in with the crowd!!! They seem to think it’s an easy diagnosis to get, or that the system is over-diagnosing, or “everyone is a bit autistic”, etc, etc. Talk about being invalidated and gaslit!!! It’s not like you just go to the doctor and tell them you feel different and they hand out a diagnosis.

[andykerslake]

I received my diagnosis 5 days ago. I have told all my friends and most have been accepting. Most know that I have sensory issues, and I am different, so telling them I am autistic was not a shock. The majority of my friends are very clued in and educated already about asd. After my diagnosis, I was told that I might become more noticeably autistic by the outside world. That was just it - I was already noticed by the outside world. I am me, I am autistic!
Thanks Orion, you help me to cope with neurotypical people 👍

[GoodBeetsME]

one of my wonderings about autistic self regulation is around knowing we all used to do physical labor as part of our day only 50 or so years ago. And, of course, even more labor before then. What I wonder is if, knowing autism has always been part of the human species, we were able to be more self regulated as exercise was built into our day through labor, especially living heavy things. Another helpful video, thanks Orion!

[robintst]

Got my diagnosis last year and now I'm 40. I thought I'd be afraid to hear the truth but it more gave me solace that I finally could put a name to what's been going on up there in the ol' brain meats all my life. Understanding that now is helping me better deal with a lot of long-standing emotional trauma and abuse too. Even with that, I've never been more at peace with myself.

[PatchworkDragon]

Your statement at 16:10 made me burst into tears. Last Friday was my last day at a job that I've had for over a decade - a job that I was good at, and one that brought me a lot of fulfillment. I have a *lot* of guilt over leaving, but "I can't put myself through this anymore" hits the nail on the head. My surprise - and relief - at knowing I am not the only one to experience this is tremendous. Between that and my discomfort with change (even good change), I have really been in distress the last few days. I only wish it were easier to explain to others.

Thank you so much, Orion.

[peekaboo]

I’m 62 & was just formally diagnosed. Going through bouts of imposter syndrome, rage, & relief. I actually only started to think I might be autistic because I found autistic creators on YouTube that I resonated with. Resonated with their childhood; their sensory sensitivities; their challenges with neurotypical interactions, etc. So I truly want to thank all those creators. Orion since I’m on your channel let me take a pause to thank you personally. Thank You❣️❣️❣️❣️ Ive thought about starting my own channel but rejection sensitivity is real my friend. As usual I don’t know how to end. Transitions are very difficult for me. I’ll just say see you around my friends 💌🦋🕊️ Anyone know how I can find/which creators have discord servers? I know one yt creator who charges to be part of her community. No, no, no‼️‼️‼️ I don’t want to do it just because they (in my opinion) are gate keeping/putting barriers up. Just goes against my grain. Infuriates🤬 me‼️‼️‼️

[angellicaderanged]

Growing up in the south US, I had a dear guy friend who always referred to me as having been "wired by drunk mechanics. ".... it was a really good way for me to phrase it until 20 years later, at 33 years old, when I found out im autistic.
Like oh... that tracks too 😅

[RyanDickey-lpsn]

I really felt the “sigh” after trying to explain your diagnosis to people 😅

[BlackSunJamie]

I am 45 and have begun the process of getting a diagnosis. It's been interesting (and extremely painful) to look back over my life and see where autism would have explained everything that I was experiencing. Now looking forward, my world has turned upside down. I feel like I have to reframe my entire understanding of how I show up in every aspect of my life. It's painful and incredibly disorienting. My bag of tools is definitely empty right now. But there is so much hope that my weirdness and difficulty with life will have an explanation beyond me just being bad or weird or unlovable. I am excited to see what life is like when I understand myself better and don't have to hide who I am. Thank you for this content. It really helps!

[ScottJohnson-tkql]

I resonate with what you are saying around 10:10 to 10:13.
However as a thoroughgoing introvert, I must say it was a pleasant surprise to have people drop out of my life after diagnosis. The less peopley my life is, the better

[simplypositiveme]

I'm stuck between self diagnosis and official diagnosis. 😮 and I've already gotten " everyone is on the spectrum, so why pursue official diagnosis." (Sigh)

[Awakenedkarolina]

Excellent video Orion. I am 64 and have recently self-diagnosed myself. Even without the ‘official, medically sanctioned’ diagnosis, I found your 20 point video to be most helpful. I am certainly in need of community as it appears that my relationship of 10 years is falling away.

[autodidactin]

Hey Orion, I just want to tell you that your videos are not only very helpful for other autistic people, but also for those of us who have an autistic person in our lives that we want to relate to in an understanding and supportive way. Thank you!

[andrewhorton]

Oh my goodness...This is just 100% me. In particular the parts about having to reassess life goals, and not being able to carry on with my job. I am a self-employed business change consultant, and it's like i purposefully picked the WORST job imaginable. Every day is a struggle from start to finish. This content is absolutely essential, thank you! Like others have said, ive always known that i dont 'fit'. I feel like life is an endless party that i just want to leave...but can't. It is really helping to lean into all of this content and community