Why an autism diagnosis is an invitation to finally be yourself | Ellie Middleton | TEDxShoreditch

Join Ellie Middleton as she takes you on her journey as a young girl with autism and ADHD and the difficulties she's faced along the way.

She discovers why she didn't fit in and why she felt the way she did.

She was unable to be her true, authentic self until getting her autism diagnosis

Discover what a medical diagnosis can do for you and your confidence, and discovering your purpose and sense of belonging. Ellie Middleton is an autistic and ADHD creator, speaker, writer and consultant. After a lifetime of feeling misunderstood, she was diagnosed with both Autism Spectrum Disorder and ADHD at the age of 24. Since then, she’s gone on to build an audience of over 300,000 people online, create the (un)masked community for neurodivergents, and work with global brands like The Independent, Google & LinkedIn to change the narrative on neurodiversity.

[LilChuunosuke]

For the first decade of my life, I was told by everyone I looked up to that I was "choosing to make my own life more difficult" and that I was an attention seeker who needed to learn how to behave. After my mental health hit rock bottom in middle school and I almost put myself out of my misery, I spent the next decade accepting that I wasn't choosing to be this way, but that I simply "failed at existing." For over 20 years, I tied my sensory sensitivities, my inability to form meaningful bonds with anyone, including my own parents and brother, my difficulties communicating my thoughts in a way others understood, my chronic exhaustion, etc to this idea that I was born a failure and that my life would never feel joyful or meaningful because comfort and security were luxuries to rejects like myself.
Learning I was autistic (and ADHD) was like lifting a weight off my shoulders that I never remembered putting on. I finally had answers. It wasn't my fault. It wasnt a choice, nor was I suffering some lifelong consequence of not being well behaved enough during early development. I finally knew why nobody wanted me around and it *FINALLY* wasn't something I had control over. Its not just me anymore. I have the language I need to help others understand me and to finally start demanding the accomodations I've been deprived of my entire life.

[CatholicOnTheSpectrum]

Finding out I was neurodivergent was like turning on windshield wipers in a rainstorm.

[rainashroff]

I am an AUDHD who has followed Ellie since she started her social media career. Ellie's content has helped me through my own autism and ADHD diagnosis journey. I gave my own TEDx talk on neurodiversity last week and a lot of Ellie's content has inspired me to speak out. Congrats Ellie!

[SoberOKMoments]

I'll be 80 in February. During the course of my long life I've successfully learned to like myself (after the age of 60) and to accept that I was different, and that being different was OK. God, after all, doesn't make junk. We are all valuable. But when I learned earlier THIS YEAR that I am autistic (Asperger's) - my entire life's struggles fell into place. I was/am so grateful to have this information that explains my many life choices, choices that often troubled my family. Well done on sharing your information so perfectly. Your story will help so many others. You truly are a star!

[rlk]

True, I got diagnosed aged 67 and just think myself to be a true eccentric, not a fake one.

[Miss.EThomas]

I’m literally crying my eyes out right now. That was so perfectly put. I was late diagnosed with autism at 26. So yeah, I feel you, Ellie. Thank you so much for that. P.S. I love your outfit! ❤❤❤

[neridafarrer]

I only just got my diagnosis of AuDHD, otherwise known as ASD+ADHD. It was yesterday. I'm a 50 year old woman. I feel like I'm, finally, coming home to myself. I so relate to the "you're not broken, your Autistic" sentiment. So great to shrug all that judgement, self judgement and sense of being unacceptable and marginalized aside! Thank you Ellie. Good talk😊.

[rhiannonhopkins]

At 66 years old, l'm In the process of getting a diagnosis. Everything in this video resonated with me, particularly other people"s too much/not enough reactions & the analogy of not having the manual that’s given to everybody else - which I've been saying ever since I first began self identifying as autistic a couple of years ago. It's so liberating, knowing there’s nothing "wrong" with me, having an explanation of why I am as I am.

[murtazaarif]

A computer program is a good example for explaining how our brains are wired differently than neurotypicals. I can relate to a lot of what she says. I have a CV full of jobs i have not been able to hold onto and people laugh at me instead of my jokes. I am now receiving disabity benefits for my depression which i didnt recover from for many years. However the system is begining to understand us. I am receiving support for overcoming my social anxiety through courses on how to communicate and personal development.

[RyanDickey-lpsn]

It’s almost coming on 1 year since I got diagnosed with having autism. I’m still learning and processing and have realized it’s going to be an on going process of self discovery and that’s okay. The diagnosis has given me more grace for myself, not saying it’s always easy but when I remember I am neurodivergent, I have an option to choose to be more gentle with myself and for that I am grateful.

[frankieleoh]

Thank you for giving us all the permission to be ourselves, Ellie! I'm also a late-diagnosis autistic girl and I can assure you being diagnosed finally allowed me to breathe and realize that there was "nothing wrong with me" - I was simply wired differently. Keep on inspiring the world, Ellie!

[callumtravers]

The windows and apple analogy was so perfect that i got chills listening to it. Im in the middle of my diagnosis at the age of 20 and it’s the hardest yet the most beautiful thing i’ve ever had to go through. SERIOUSLY, THANKYOU for sharing.

[Miracle-Needed]

Each moment:
life gets easier and easier.
And better and better!

I love my life.
I adore who I am.

I will no longer be trapped
in a fake prison.
I am setting myself free, NOW!

It hurt, and that's the past.
I now live in the present.

I am the phoenix
rising from the ashes!

[Risingfire]

This almost makes me want to cry. I feel for her so much because i was in that same situations too.

[plllavender]

"you're not broken" really healed my heart

[bethroot]

Getting an ADHD diagnosis at 65 was a game changer. After years of wondering why things that came easily to others were so hard. And exhausting to me, I was overjoyed to find that I wasn’t broken, my mind just works differently and always will.

[bridgitmckee]

44 and I just got a diagnosis in April and the only reason that came about was because of helping my children. My youngest Daughter (14) just got her diagnosis a few days ago. I'm happy for her. Will she still face struggles, yes, but at least she has awareness and resources.

[lanamaceachern]

Thank you for sharing your experience and giving a public voice to things many of us can relate to. I realized I was autistic at 47, and was formally diagnosed autistic + ADHD two weeks before my 48th birthday. That was two months ago. After so many years of heavy masking, I'd lost sight of what 'myself' looked like. I'm gradually rediscovering that now.

[JoeE-egys]

What a courageous and strong young lady. Flying the ADHD flag strong with pride.

[rodrigoferreiramagalhaes]

It was beautyfull !!!
I fight the same battle for over 39 years, i know that I'm different from others since i started school and i experienced almost the same experiences and thoughts as yours. I survived masking, neglecting and denying myself.
I'm not officially diagnosed yet but for about 2 years I've been studying the last knowledge about autism and listening to experiences of autistic people for all over the world so i could identify my own experience in everyone of theirs.
It's wonderful to discover that I'm not wrong at all.