How to Deal with Negative Emotions: Daily Proven Techniques

An unexpected and troublesome feature of being human is that we feel so much more than we spontaneously realise we feel. There are emotions coursing through us - of anger or joy, resentment or fear - that lie just outside the sphere of ordinary consciousness and that elude us as we rush through the challenges of our lives.

FURTHER READING

“An unexpected and troublesome feature of being human is that we feel so much more than we spontaneously realise we feel. There are emotions coursing through us — of anger or joy, resentment or fear — that lie just outside the sphere of ordinary consciousness, and which elude us as we rush through the challenges of our lives.

These emotions lie low in part because they are often too shocking, sad or contrary to expectations for us to want to make sense of them. We might hate where we are supposed to love; or may feel sad where we are meant to be practical — and so, out of timidity and fear, we omit to register our authentic reality. Or else our feelings get ignored because they enter our minds too fast, and in too great a quantity for us to disentangle them in the limited time we devote to self-understanding…”

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CREDITS

Produced in collaboration with:

Na Na Na Studio

Léon Moh-Cah

Title animation produced in collaboration with

Graeme Probert

[kokikara]

Asking the question how I'm feeling now might be important, but it's also (if not more) important to answer that question with honesty not in denial.

[GCastro]

I find that you don’t even always have to try to understand where an emotion comes from, just acknowledging that it is there and allowing it to be is enough. Great video

[tagarbakhtawar]

"Mental unwellness is born out of an accumulation of unfelt feelings." So many people need to hear, read, and know this! A big majority of the people I know go through life without feeling the tough feelings, thinking ignoring the feelings that make you feel pain are just going to go away. No, they stay in us, constantly replicating and reproducing in unrelated interactions with people who did not cause us the hurt to begin with.

[aoyenngoc]

Such a right timing as usual. Growing up in an Asian upbringing setting, having mental illnesses is considered such a face-losing taboo, therefore we neglect it most of our lives. One of the most embarrassing panic attacks ever happened to me was in the end of a first date, which of course made all the charming evaporate in the guy's eyes. I decided to ask for help from a psychologist. I frantically talked to him in a crisis, that I was scared of becoming sb with mental problems, that I would end up hurting people because maybe I had some covert narcissism that I even wasn't aware of. I returned home waiting for the first therapy. By the meantime, I decided to read more, started to write a lot of stuff down: asking questions of what triggered me, what happened to me in the past, are those events justifiable. I left some unanswered either. I classified the emotions, gave them names, turned the emotions into some logic maps to argue with my mind.

One week later I came to talk with the psychologist again and somehow all the harsh feelings of self-hatred were gone. "Mental unwellness is born out of an accumulation of unfelt feelings'. He claimed that I got nothing, that panic attacks happen also to mentally strong people and flashbacks of memories or traumas are not a part of my ID, not my personalities at all. That how quickly I turned from sb in mental breakdown to sb who looked calm and started to be more articulate is proof that we actually have all the answers and needed emotions in our head. We just need to use them right.

For the first time in my life, I feel healed and raise my hopes high again.

Also thanks to this channel. This school of life is a treasure.

[uwluspn]

Also remember to not hold into limited emotions and let it determine our character. We're creatures that can feel lot of emotions and need to learn to control them. By living in the moment

[SearchOfSelf]

Our bodies hold stories untold, waiting for us to listen. By tuning in and embracing our physical sensations, we unlock a deeper understanding of ourselves 🙏

[stacypob]

As I get older, I’m becoming better at giving myself time to identify my emotions, so I can process them better. It’s a work in progress.

[evita.enwefah]

Alan's voice and manner of delivery are simply fascinating. The last sentence hit hard.😢

[DSKJr]

All videos and animations are excellent, but I believe the animators of this one did an exceptionally great job at visually expressing the concepts and ideas of the narrator. Bravo!

[BarbaraT.]

Thank you, Alain. Your voice and delivery is always so moving and it adds a lot to an already brilliant script. I'm not sure you realise that. The last sentence hit me right in the heart.

[Dashingdiva]

Mental unwellness comes from a series of unfelt emotions... wow mind-blowing.

[WhenIsItUs]

I love the illustration of how we process the good emotions that we experience throughout our lives, but get stuck with the negative ones we dont know how to process, perhaps to the point that we cannot handle any new emotions, causing us to mislead ourselves in to believing that negative emotions are all we have.

Emotions dont necessarily reflect reality, and I think it is the sadly common notion that we should regard our emotions as incapable of deception. Dont seek to bend reality because you feel a certain way. Certainly don't be too rigid with them either, but seek to find that flexible middle.

Thank you School of Life for helping put words to important lessons too often left to chance or "don't worry, it'll come to you naturally".

[kimberknutson]

Brilliant and profound. Rather than proceed from a philosophical position such as, say, "I think therefore I am, " human beings would be much better served to operate from emotional/sensory position: "I feel therefore I am." My therapist claims that Dr. Van der Kolk's book, The Body Keeps the Score, quite literally "changed the world" of psychology and psychiatry. It is just taking time (more than a decade) for people to catch up with all that it means and exactly what to do about that. The idea that the "voice in our heads" which we think of as "us" could be at odds with the apparatus in which the brain is "housed" is truly astounding. I don't know much for certain, but I am pretty sure that in ANY contest between the voice in the head and the body, the body will win every single time. The body registers and responds to sights, sounds, smells, etc. that the "mind" does not even notice...until too late. The body's primary objective is to survive to see another day, even if the existence that the individual is "enjoying" is bleak. The body is an elegant machine and is also a system of which the brain is only one part. You guys and gals laid all of that out very well. Thank you. : )

[BarbaraT.]

I feel burdened by my previous lack of planning. I feel anguished at the sight of my ill mother (whom I've hated for years, may I add...). I feel at a loss, yet strangely still afloat.
I hope this makes sense somehow.

[luizamatias]

My problem is how aware i am of my emotions, sometimes i just want to fell nothing and thats where i tend to dangerous thoughts

[scalzysparkz]

There might also be a struggle of de-tangling said emotions in a busy environment that will require attention, so it might be best to lay low in such cases until a comfortable place is reached.

[minimutt]

The last line is very true. I now prioritize journaling and meditation but still find myself wanting to do everything but allowing time for quiet introspection.

[juliamansurova]

as always, through your videos you've found the right words that will stick with me for a long time ❤

[livinlikeiris]

Thank you. I really needed this. I want to be set free

[velocitysam]

Am glad this narrator came back.From now on, I'll be commenting this in all his new uploads.He has a soothing haunting voice.