Don’t feel like you belong In this world?

The thing that got me into psychology is the same thing that almost completely derailed my entire life. And to this day, I'm still not sure what that thing was.

Why did I feel like I didn't belong in this world? What caused me to believe the life I was living was the wrong one?

I spent 5 years chasing a feeling that something existed "out there" that could fix everything inside of me. During this period I felt no connect to anything or anyone in my life. It was all there, but I didn't care about it.

The only reason I am where I am in life right now is because of some specific coping tools that I'm going to walk you through.

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Disclaimer: This content is not intended to be a replacement for receiving treatment. It is purely educational in nature. My relationship with you is that of presenter and audience, not therapist and client.

But I do care.

[User-uwuw]

I feel like I’m watching everyone else from a looking glass and they’re all enjoying relationships and connection while I can’t.

[albertmarnell]

The more aware you are, the lonelier your life will be.

[cmvamerica]

For me it’s like a mixture of anxiety, depression, and wanting to be free from the prison of being the person I am.

[miaachingheart]

I'm 60 years old and for as long as I can remember, I always feel like I want to go home. But I don't know where home is 😢 I also have long periods of time where I know that I love people but I don't feel it.

[yuumoe]

I feel detached and I don't feel like I belong anywhere. I feel like an alien. I don't feel connected with most people. I don't have interest in what most ppl do. I tend to depend on myself, don't know how to ask for help when I need it. I'm afraid of rejection so I'm not usually proactive. I don't feel understood. And when people have misunderstandings or wrong assumptions about me, I don't feel like explaining and standing up for myself. I just let it be but then I get hurt and disappointed in society. But recently, I had an outburst. I got defensive and rude which put me in awkward situation with my colleagues. I think it results from suppressing all the feeling of unfairness when I was misunderstood. I think I'm also lonely. I don't have anyone to talk to about such things. My family don't understand and I don't have any friends to talk to. And the feeling of isolation and not fitting in make it worse. I always feel like I'm not normal and something is broken inside me. I think people also realize I'm not normal. I feel insecure. I don't know how to go on, I'm not sure about my future. My career and my life...I'm not sure if I can make it.

[LucasAttemptsLife]

I am cursed with self awareness. The happiness I've been in life is when I chose to be ignorant.

[junaidmuhammed]

Our society was not built for people. That's deep, Doc.

[JaimzNichol]

This is beyond relatable .. for years I’ve said that I felt homesick for a place I can’t remember

[hello_sunshine]

I died around 14 and still dead at 60. I just move through space, doing the best I can to help my family. Didn't work, marry, have children. Have no goals, nothing interests me. The only thing I am glad about is that I am 60 and physical death isn't too far off anymore.

[Mmmmchocolate]

I don’t feel like this world is for me at all. This world is not what I hoped it would be.

[nata]

Ignorance is happiness. I noticed that the more I am aware of my self and aware of people and everything of the world I became sad, feeling empty and everything seems don’t make sense.

[TheJoker]

I am 58 and dont think I am ever going to enjoy my life anymore after what has happened the last four years. The best part of my day is coffee and my kitty cat on my lap in the morning.

[GrEditrix]

It's not so much that I feel alone -- rather, I feel left behind. So many people seemed to have moved forward in life.

[Lisette]

I am so glad you shared this. Please don't feel bad about feeling vulnerable. This quote by Krishnamurti really resonates here - "It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society". I think those of us who can't adjust, are likely the healthiest among us - we know this society or civilisation is so bent and corrupt, and that we, being healthy, cannot bend ourselves to fit inside it. It's only nature's drive to survive that keeps us going within it.

[niclucci]

The homesick feeling is loss of innocence. We think it’s a normal part of growing up but it’s not. It results from the need (of all young adults) to integrate with and exist “normally” within a sick society. The internal conflict results from having to develop and integrate with a culture and environment that is fundamentally at odds with ourselves. The apparent “healthy” and “normal” response to which is self-denial (ie just getting on with your life) but inevitably results in the sort of existential turmoil and feelings of estrangement you describe. The answer is to fix our sick society so that developing children are born into and remain in a healthy loving and nurturing environment. Not easy, but absolutely critical for any advanced society.

[maliniatb]

im not depressed, i still can feel joy in little things, like a nice hot chocolate. But as soon as it comes to myself and something where i have to put actual work into... im just .. i just dont have the motivation.

[idonthaveahandle]

I truly feel and believe that I was born in the wrong world. It is not just a feeling for me, but a fact. It’s not even about mental illness, it’s the fish out of water syndrome, a guppy in a shark tank syndrome at times. People are motivated by extrinsic rewards like money, power, sx, war, things etc. I am motivated by connection, love, vulnerability, and just wanting to see others happy. It has been quite difficult to find that reward in modern society. I am motivated by the beauty of nature and want to nourish it. Other people (the mainstream) want to cut down the forest, build houses, and pretty much pave and control nature. We have HOAs (a big part of many people’s lives) that insist we keep our lawns and NEVER plant trees. I know I would be happier surrounded by trees, but once I plant them, I get scrutinized by the neighbors. I like to take things slow and enjoy the moment, other people want me to hurry up. Cars are made to go fast and we are dependent on them, I prefer to walk or bike places, but most places are made for fast cars. Biking and walking to the grocery store is a risky endeavor. As a woman, it is even riskier. I don’t belong in this human world. I feel it in my soul, but I belong in nature, and perhaps a society focused more on nature, moderation, balance, love, kindness, peace, slowing it down, calmness, quietness, and support. I don’t think that society really exists. Yes, a lot of our modern marvels keep us alive and safe, which I appreciate, but they don’t nourish our mental health or nature. This modern society does not nourish our souls.

[johnandersson]

“The loneliness of feeling unseen by others is as fundamental a pain as physical injury, but it doesn't show on the outside. Emotional loneliness is a vague and private experience, not easy to see or describe. You might call it a feeling of emptiness or being alone in the world. Some have called this feeling existential loneliness, but there's nothing existential about it. If you feel it, it came from your family.”
― Lindsay C. Gibson, _Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents_

[hollysquietspace]

Another thing that's hard is you see most people around you acting fake happy because most people are dying inside but just pretend they're happy or don't face their issues.

[Jess-zmxt]

I’m so happy I’m not the only human being who feels so trapped in this world, this time and this body. I’m so afraid all the time. I’m so exhausted and I just want to know one person who understands me. I’m so afraid.