How I Told My Husband I Wanted to Leave the Mormon Church

So many people end up getting divorced after leaving the Mormon Church. I feel so lucky to have married someone who loved me regardless of my religious beliefs. We'll be answering questions below! Let us know what we missed in the interview.

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[PawsitivelyQuestionable]

"Not once in the process of leaving the church did I consider divorcing you." Real man right there, loyal all the way. His point about mental flexibility was really well put. Y'all are a beautiful couple!

[emmalinekim]

I'm obsessed with the fact that Alyssa accidentally orchestrated her own mini episode of Mormon bachelorette in order to find a husband

[MynameisBrianZX]

Floored that Jackson was the "bad boy" figure but it's because he critically considers dogma and respects human rights.

[nd]

Alyssa, you ARE a teacher. Just not the way you envisioned it. You have taught so many people about the Mormon church, some of us nevermos and some probably questioning and wanting to leave. I imagine you’ve helped more people than you know, and the impact you’ve had is huge.

[PRANKZOMBIE]

It’s really impressive that he had that kind of perspective on gay marriage as a member of the church. Also having the wherewithal to understand that his religious beliefs should not dictate the laws of others who don’t share them

[katiekawaii]

"Nah, I talked to God about it. We're cool." The most badass response he could have come back with.

[l-.-l-hey]

My grandma was exmormon and while living in Utah being a single mom she helped women and young girls that wanted to leave the Mormon church because of a marriage that their father or family set them up with and had no other choice but to marry. She'd give them a place to stay and help them get back on their feet, she was a badass❤️

[theloverlyladylo]

That party is hilarious! I’m imagining it as something from a nature documentary.

“The single Mormon males are all seeking the attention of the Mormon female. One, in order to reclaim her attention, one brings sustenance to distract the other males. His ploy is successful, and he claims the spot next to her on the couch.”

[bleubird]

My wife and I stopped attending church about 10 years ago. Our journey has been similar to yours. My wife had doubts about the church a few years ago prior to that. We were not on the same page for a year or two. I struggled with that for a while but I always felt that my wife was more important than the church. After some time I began to think more critically about things that used to really bother me about the church (polygamy in particular).

When the church implemented the November 5th policy (the one where the church said they would not baptize the children of gay parents). It felt to me that the Church leadership was being vindictive because they could no longer prevent same sex marriages. Within a month, I asked to be released from my calling as a youth Sunday school teacher and I stopped attending church. My life has been so much better ever since.

[abigailfoster]

Your story of your final day at church had me sitting here slack-jawed. I grew up evangelical and no longer am active in the church, but much of my extended family is. I truly cannot imagine the courage it took for you to stand up there in front of everybody and essentially say “yeah, so, maybe most of this is bullshit” and then walk out. The thought of doing that myself, even now when I’ve been out of the church for years, makes me want to curl into a ball with anxiety. You’re such an unbelievable badass, Alyssa!

[bryceburgart]

My wife and I left the LDS church after 45 years. That was 10 years ago, and we discussed having a vow renewal that is more like a “real” wedding, finally, last year, my wife and I did a 30th anniversary vow renewal. Wedding dress, new suit, new wedding ring professional photographer, the whole 9 yards. Wedding reception at a banquet hall on the beach (including open bar, to the horror of our Mormon parents), then a honeymoon cruise down to Mexico. It was awesome! We got married the right way our second time!

Highly recommend you do it (kind of costs a lot of $$ though, prepare for that)

[CW-rtsr]

I think you two deciding to drink coffee together the first time is absolutely the biggest moment. I think that's when you became spiritually sealed to each other for all eternity. That moment is sacred because you examined your beliefs and moved through them together.

[beautibrew]

I'm an atheist that has never been mormon or even interacted with anyone from the mormon church but your videos are so fascinating to me that i can't stop watching them. It's so rare to get such a detailed look into what actually happens in the mormon faith from someone as eloquent and transparent as you and your husband are. So happy for you both that you followed your own path and stayed true to your relationship through all of it!

[simonekoves]

It's a little hilarious that your Capstone project (and the thing which broke your shelf) was a flowchart of Joseph Smith's body count 💀

[NadiaDinger]

OMG! I am so amazed that you truly questioned the dogma taught by the church. I went to BYU as a non-Mormon. Many tried to convert me. I actually met president Hinkley once while working for catering at BYU while serving at a banquet. My Mormon roommates were so jealous. They told me, “you will believe once you meet our prophet”. Well, I met him and even said hello. Nothing changed in my mind, no aha moment, no bright light, etc. he was a very nice old man who did not like carrots. It was a pleasant encounter and nothing more.
I did have a great experience and fantastic roommates while studying there. They even saved me from very eager missionaries knowing that I had no interest in becoming a Mormon. I appreciated that they did not judge me and were not afraid of me (some Mormons do not like associating with non-Mormons). We always had mutual respect for each other. Some of my non-Mormon friends had a different experience. Sadly.

[hannahlienert-brown]

You've become a teacher, but not in the way you thought you'd be ❤

[somebody]

omg you guys have such a healthy relationship literal goals

[House_Of_Brine]

I honestly feel like in all the other mormon pics I've seen of Alyssa, her eyes don't have the sparkle and emotion that you can clearly see in the engagement photos. Clearly, you two have something special! ❤

[Airelda]

You chose a keeper - one only has to see the compassionate, thoughtful and respectful way Jackson listens to you without interrupting. He’s a good one! Happy for you!

[ericarodriguez]

I’m a few years older than you, was not raised in the Moridor, discovered the truth about Joseph Smith as a teenager, and left the church when I turned 18. I gasped when you told your story about bearing your testimony on your last day of church! I could only dream to be so bold! I’m so proud of your courage and strength.