Autistic Adults - How to Feel Like You BELONG in this World

Hi! I'm Orion Kelly and I'm Autistic. On this video I provide some practical ways you can feel a sense of belonging in this world as an Autistic person. Plus, I share my personal lived experiences as an #actuallyautistic person. #orionkelly #autism #asd #autismsigns #whatautismfeelslike

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ABOUT ORION:
Orion Kelly is an #ActuallyAutistic vlogger (YouTuber), podcaster, radio host, actor, keynote speaker and Autistic advocate based in Australia. Orion is all about providing validation and support for Autistic people and their loved ones.

#AutisticVoices #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Autism #OrionKelly #ThatAutisticGuy #ASD

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⛔️*Disclaimer: The videos contained on this channel are for general education and entertainment purposes only and do not constitute professional advice. For professional advice and training seek assistance from a qualified provider. All views are my own and do not represent those of my employers or sponsors. Some images used are stock images.*⛔️

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[siennaprice]

I’m completely blind, autistic and have CPTSD. I get out in nature, I find joy in creating improvisational music. I find I communicate and express myself better through music than anything else. I also have a deep way of thinking.

[Adz-NZ]

Solo travelling/exploring is something I highly recommend. I have been on hikes, music concerts, movies, camping, meals etc alone more than I have with others. I find it so much more enjoyable and authentic. I am doing it because I want to be there and enjoy the experience for what it is

[Phuntar]

"Stuff the rest" is incredibly validating

[homesteadgamer]

When I go somewhere alone, all I have to worry about is ME. I'll only have to worry about when ~I~ have to go to bathroom or when ~I~ am hungry or what ~I~ want to see, rather than waiting my turn to to see if I'll even be able to do what I want to do. Solo exploration is amazing.

[sharonaumani]

I grew up with pets and I'm not sure I would have survived my childhood without them. Sometimes they were all I had.

When I purchased my home a decade ago, I was overwhelmed with the weedy grass. I didn't know I would become a gardener. [And, no, I don't know everything there is to know about it, because I could never remember shit, though I know to look up the info, at least]. I have a love/hate relationship with the garden. Our summers are super dry and watering gets old! But it's true that there is something about getting out in nature, working with the earth. It's great meditation for the ADHD side of my brain. It doesn't stop my head. Thoughts continue like a runaway train. Yet, there is more of an awareness of that, like the earth "holds space" for my busy brain and soaks it all up, leaving me more refreshed and energized. It has also become my working palette, bringing me joy as I get to see how the landscape I created develops and get to watch the pollinators. It also allows me another outlet, to utilize my phone, photographing the flowers, etc., also allowing me to see and remember how things evolve and change....cycle of life.

Solo travel, indeed :) I enjoy traveling with others, but there is something special about traveling alone.

[ncc-]

I absolutely love travelling alone! Most people don't understand that and pity me. Or they find me very courageous for some reason. No need for that! It is so much harder for me to travel with someone than to travel alone, so why would I even want that?

[knowbrainer]

My wife and I both love reading. She outpaces me with how fast she can read, but she doesn't write. I write and she's always encouraging me to keep at it so she can read my stuff. Thankfully I know she's not just blowing smoke up my backside: she can extremely critical about things written by other people, and she'll let me know if something I've written isn't working.

[CherriRobo]

I love this idea, but I feel like it's a different story for women. I'm terrified to go alone, :( because things happen to women all the time. If I could live in a safe world I would like to just wander about but I can't.

I like the hotel idea, maybe I'll try stay at one close to me. Thank you Orion :).

[theresjer]

I can't have pets in my apartment, but I can volunteer once a week at an animal sanctuary, where I can feel my humanity acknowledged and exercised.

[jenb]

Regardless of neurodivergence, I think pets are an integral part of being a healthy human. I know bugs aren't everyone's cup of tea, but colony pets like ants or isopods are fantastic because they're fun to watch, easy to care for, and you don't get depressed when an individual passes on because it's the colony as a whole that you really care for.
There is a LOT of information out there too about how to properly set up a habitat for them and keep them healthy and happy.
On the other hand, my cat makes a much better cuddle buddy and sleep companion. I've had a few spiders try to join me in bed this autumn and I was NOT expressly keen on that.

[frankster]

Some of us can't do pets for any number of reasons ($$). Plants are an excellent alternative. They're alive, and they need our care. If you work with energy you can communicate with them. I have a money "tree" (actually a vine) that started out 5 inches tall as a gift when I had surgery over 20 years ago. Now it's taller than I am and thriving.

[homesteadgamer]

What's even better exploring alone is running into other autistic people who are also exploring solo and have a great chat about something super interesting and making a super cool friend... and then each going your own way to finish your solo vacations without feeling pressure to call each other or team up for anything. If you end up needing to, that's great. But there's zero pressure when you run into someone else exactly like you on their own solo vacation.

[denisethegood]

The comments section under these videos are so valuable. Recently someone told me 'we are all friend, we just haven't met in person yet'. That's such a lovely way to look at friendships and loneliness - which most of us struggle with. ❤

[CelestiaQuixs]

I used to live in a semi-rural neighborhood and being in Nature was my go-to for decompressing. Unfortunately, I now live in the Las Vegas NV Metro area and avoid going outdoors; because...people. I am disabled with mobility issues; so, there is no way for me to get out of the city and into nature. I did buy a sunlamp to sit under and a box of fresh grass to put my feet into.

I've been trying to find my 'tribe' forever and have never found them. I'm an Autistic INFJ Pisces with Complex PTSD caused by Family Scapegoating Abuse. All of the other suggestions you've given (except for RPG...I hate games because people are poor sports and I hate that people use RPGs to give themselves permission to break rules they wouldn't break in real life), I do them on my own.

I draw, paint, create music, and crochet. I have two cats. I run a couple of websites and sell things online. Sadly, I still feel purposeless; because, I have no one in my life. After the family murder/suicide five years ago, my Family of Origin and my adult children abandoned me when I fell apart. What gave my life meaning was my children and grandchildren and that was 'taken' from me. People tell me I need to find other meaning in my life; but, there is nothing that can replace my children and grandchildren.


I used to travel alone and enjoyed it; but, with my mobility issues and the fact that I'm no longer invited to family gatherings (including funerals) there's no longer opportunities nor the ability, even if the opportunities were still there.

[autisticjenny]

Thank you! This community is amazing that you have created! I really needed and appreciate this video. The socializing part is very hard for me. I have spent many years wondering why anyone would want to be my friend because I felt I came across as weird. But people on your channel and autistic channels in general are my tribe. Creative expression and content creating brings so much joy! You nailed this.

[reallyboringindividual]

I have a small circle of people I can comfortably talk with just fine about incredibly deep topics, exploring different tangents ad nauseam for hours. Keyword: small. I can’t stand high-people-density environments.

I like to think of myself as someone who can emulate expected neurotypical behavior fairly well, but there are limits to that. I often find myself in situations where I want to stick my head in the sand so I don’t have to deal with all the noise.

With that being said, I found my special thing very early in my life and ended up pursuing it as a career. Ultimately led me to a CTO title, a position which requires plenty of people skills - given its executive level nature (I find myself feel like an impostor more often than not, though). This position ultimately made it possible for me to discover a place where I feel the most at ease - Japan. Funny. A place that’s bustling with people and that has a complex social culture. Well, it’s fairly rigid and predictable - which is what I think makes me feel a lot more comfortable than the culture and society of my home country.


Feel like I went off on a bunch of different tangents here and my comment isn’t very coherent, sorry. 😂

PS. I absolutely love traveling alone. I despise traveling with other people. Going places by myself gives me the precious little time I have to be by myself and explore places at my own pace.

[jbrubin]

Eating out by myself is so wonderful. I take a book and enjoy my meal in peace.
For the most part, I always tell the waitstaff that Im alone and fine. However when you’re a woman eating alone everyone assumes I’ve been stood up. I see the sympathy looks. The amount of times I’ve had a free random drink from another kind table, I feel like now I’m making others uncomfortable.
I don’t really drink but I always make sure I express my gratitude. I know they’re trying to be kind, thinking about from their pov, I get it. Unfortunately I find myself leaving very quickly after, apparently I don’t belong there alone.

[duerremueller]

thank you for this, I've been feeling like not staying in this world lately and this helped me start lifting myself out of it

[evelynabston]

Amen to everything you said Orion. My boyfriend and I (we are both autistic )❤😢have the best conversations. We discuss everything. I also have a group of autistic friends and we have a blast together. I love my tribe. I do finally feel I belong. Great video. Thank you for sharing.

[snowglass]

Perfect timing this video..I just got diagnosed and then took a day out on my own to where I grew up and re-trod my inner child footsteps to re-connect to her. Really helped as 40 years on I totally lost myself ❤