THE PARASITIC NATURE OF NARCISSISTIC RELATIONSHIPS

Narcissists take over your life while giving very little in return. Everything a narcissist gives has strings attached that cost far more than what you receive from them. Narcissists create the illusion that they are giving far more than they are and that you owe them much more than you do. Understanding this can help you break free from narcissistic manipulation.

Here is contact information for when immediate help with abuse or self harm is needed. It is recommended that you use a computer or phone that your abuser cannot monitor:

Emergency: 911
National Domestic Violence Hotline: [phone]
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
National Hopeline Network: 1-800-SUICIDE (800-784-2433)
Crisis Text Line: Text "DESERVE" TO 741-741
Self-Harm Hotline: 1-800-DONT CUT (1-800-366-8288)
YWCA - 202-467-0801
Canadian Assaulted Women's Helpline: 1-866-863-0511
UK National Domestic Abuse Hotline: [phone]
South Africa POWA: 011 642 434/6
Australia: 1-800-RESPECT

[emmarae]

They make you perpetually uncomfortable, but god forbid you criticize them on anything.

[oisinroche]

They feel you are ignoring them if you are not paying them attention 24 /seven, once they enter the room, you feel your life force seeping out.

[SheldonBrown]

My daughter demanded that no loans were taken out for college tuition. I had to give her mother $500 every month, and I was giving her $500 a month. I was an educator, and was only bringing home $3K a month. After rent, utilities, and gas for car, I had like $200 a month for food. I was skipping meals, and living off rice and beans, occasionally some Taco Bell . She was telling me I wasn’t giving her “any money” the whole time. I found out she was living a grandiose lifestyle, eating out at fancy restaurants and what not. After that first year, I only gave her like $300 every other month, and just ignored her complaints. Much better. And yes, my daughter followed her mother’s example, of being a narcissist 😢

[hissyfitz]

The NEX refused to even get a part time job while he was in school. He would be laying in the sofa when I came home from work & literally kick his feet in a temper tantrum if I didn’t run over to him to see how his day went. The first time I kicked him out I told him he was nothing but a PARASITE! That was in 1975! Then he wanted to go away for a week of hunting in another state for his vacation. 🤦🏻‍♀️ The second & final time I kicked him out was my liberation. 30 years later we were at a reunion & he asked what happened to the engagement ring 💍 he bought for me, saying that cost a lot of money (it was $600 - I chose it). Did he want a refund? Should I have billed him for half the rent, food, gas, etc. while we were married??? Parasite is the nicest thing one can say about them. ENTITLED USERS is more like it.

[poupou]

So true !! they literally dump people like they are some sort of worn out item

[suzannechurcher]

My ex actually referred to himself as a parasite when I ended the relationship during a particularly nasty devaluation 'No more parasite for you' he said.

[mymiracle]

You are so wise for your age....I learned this lesson the hard way.

[kaystephens]

Wow. Mine Said that. "I've made an investment. A bottomless pit. They'll drain you dry. You are so right.

[susanparker]

The gift giving becomes this perpetual dept cycle. I just ignore it, which is not easy. My ex boyfriend is like the gift that just keeps on giving. It's the guilt card over and over. I won't bite on the bait. I owe him nothing.

[kingsagenda]

Lol, I remember when married to my ex, he gave me his bank card to go shopping. I had a cart full of food, and his card didn't work. So embarrassing! I had to get out of line to the ATM to try to withdraw money. The ATM read unauthorized. I called him to tell him and he started barrating me about a fight we had days prior and then admitted to calling the bank to report the card lost. He did that to me twice. I paid for everything and had to beg for his half of the rent. The bum didn't even own a car and used my vehicle more than I did. If you ask him today, he will tell you he did so much for me.

[stefaniedodge]

She is the best on these matters. Frankly spoken and always on point!

[ubrahman]

Hard to believe at first, but 100 % true, 28 years of abuse, I almost died, divorce ongoing now for 3 years! How are these people made?

[samxsara]

Idont feel i owe him sh|t bc i never feel it comes from the heart, i even told him I never believed in people who offer things freely. Last night he got me a gift for my kitchen so i could cook what HE WANTS. And when i actually pointed that he got this gift more for him than me, omg he went into such a rage and called me all sorts of things. I got up quietly and left. That really was the last piece i needed to understand his fake persona

[cherripitman]

Married 5 years. I filed for divorce, he was served and then brought a Christmas gift, which he gave tried to give it to me twice. I said no, but he doesn't respect boundaries, so I just put it in the garage. He NEVER did a dish in those 5 years and suddenly, he has loaded and/or run the dishwasher 3 times this week. What??? I wish I could just get up and leave, but I cannot because I pay all the bills and would get into trouble due to state laws. All the money I spent 28 years saving for retirement is gone, I have had to take money out multiple times because he refuses to help financially and I don't make enough to keep the household running on my own, but he always says, "you should have enough money to cover the bills". They ruin you and they don't care.

[cateyu]

Yes, my narc father would bring me fast food for dinner and withhold it until I thanked him enough. He would say "now what do you say to your father? I'm doing this because I love you" and I remember as a kid thinking, "dad, it's your job to feed me. As a parent, you're supposed to do this" but he had to hold it over my head and used it to guilt trip me for years after

[bradmcewen]

You are one of a few favorites that your vlogs should be in a health classroom. Imagine being in 9th or 10th grade and you get an education of awareness....but its quite probable a good many parents and school authorities would be thinking it hits too close to home. In this point in time its negligence not to provide social self protective skills not to mention the vocabulary expansion.

[chxwv]

My ex actually created feelings in me to do even that work for her, to discard her, when I had needed her the most . I had even told her, so there was no miscommunication, that I had needed her when I was having medical crisis, and she had absolutely no compassionate response to that, verbal or non verbal !

[emmarae]

"They make you grateful for them just being kind" OMG, its so true. They lower our standards so low that when they do things like laundry they think they should be rewarded.

[BigRebel]

Your getting change from the cashier is exactly how they “feel “. I gave my narc daughter a bouquet 💐 of artificial flowers, and she just glared at me with a hateful look, didn’t even say thank you!! But that’s the way she is: the way she does ANYTHING is the way she does EVERYTHING!

[jainetu]

I love how you touch on topics which are not that spoken about but are super validating for the ones who have decided to dig a bit deeper when searching for answers!