What Is Self-esteem in Codependency Recovery?

What is self-esteem in codependency recovery? In this video you will learn the 6 reasons why codependents struggle with low self-esteem and what it takes to build healthy self-esteem. If this resonates with you, you're not alone.

Codependency recovery means building self-esteem and awareness around childhood issues and traumas that still impact you today. You can learn how to feel good about yourself again. I can't wait to help! #selfesteem #codependency #codependent

0:00 Introduction
0:49 We don't get the time, attention and encouragement we needed
1:40 You grow up focused on taking care of others and neglecting yourself
2:29 Codependents confuse self-esteem with being arrogant
3:50 Codependents don't get a lot of positive encouragement
4:06 Positive feedback about who you are not what you do
5:07 Codependents are constantly comparing themselves to others.
5:32 What are your unique talents that nobody else has?
5:50 When we are codependent, we don't trust ourselves.
7:02 Trusting yourself contributes to healthy self-esteem.
7:19 Feedback is not the only measure for making decisions.

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✅ FREE Ebook on Building Confidence

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📒 Check out my Codependency E-Workbook: Your Guide to Being Your Best Self

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Michelle is a psychotherapist, codependency expert, and anger management, specialist. She’s been featured in The Daily Positive, BossMom, Psych Central, The Good Men Project, and Your Tango just to name a few. Her relationship recovery helps people go from relationships that don’t serve them, to learning how to trust themselves and create mutually satisfying connections that work. Michelle loves creating online products and courses on relationship skills, codependency recovery, anger management, conflict resolution, self-esteem, and self-trust.

[monaperry]

I'm learning in my own recovery journey how low self esteem is also a response to trauma in so many ways. Great explanation Michelle!❤

[diannewelsh]

That was so clarifying Michelle.. I like the way you explain things in a clear and simple way.
Everything you say resonates... I'm very motivated to recover, especially as I see how much my co dependency has affected my adult daughters. Much guilt there!

[Pioramic]

You articulated this so well. I identify a lot with what you described. Thank you for your work and sharing 🙏🏽

[juliemcmillian]

This is such a great video - I've watched it twice! The last 22 years have been about "doing the work" that recovery requires and even though I've done the hard work, it's never really over. I'll always need a tune-up now and then and this was perfect! I'm going to check out your other resources as well Michelle - thank you!!! xoxo

[jf]

Michelle thank you, that was really clear. I would like to start journalling but have no idea how to start. I have not found the link you mention in the video, can you please share it again?

[deborah]

Hi. Just found your video. I have been trying to correct so much of my maladaptive behaviors and this really shined a light for me. Thank you! I look forward to more.

[brightphoebesays]

Growing up I thought everyone else was better than me, that I had to win deserving, that if anyone gave me attention then I was lucky. I still have trouble differentiating between my own wants and arrogance. SOmetimes I think, "to heck with it! I'll just be arrogant then!"

There's a place in town that need a staff member for summer. I think they want me, and I'm interested in the job but I don't need a job right now, and I have a lot of work I want to do at home. I very nearly said I'd like the job, but I gave myself a buffer. I promised myself I would not take the job when I saw them, I almost wrote to her the next day, but I hesitated. I WILL need a job next summer though. This job may not be available then. But I don't want to take the job for their sake and not my own. It's not MY problem. And I don't want to not get done the things I have planned for this summer at my property. What makes it hard is that I really want to be accepted in my new community, but I also don't want to mess people around by saying yes when I mean no. I did that once already.


Self trust too, I've been having a hard time selecting the paint colour for the living room. I've painted it twice and still not happy with the colour. Choosing a third colour now. Hope there wont be a fourth! I don't trust that I know what's best for my own house! If I don't know what I like, nobody does!

I want to be a person people know they can't mess with, but I am soooo far from that! I even stutter being firm with my 20 year old! Now my mom is coming to visit tomorrow and I'm scared she's going to give unsolicited advice and opinions, and that I won't be able to stand up for my choices. This visit will be a real test.