Why INFJs are Bad Listeners

Why the INFJ is not one of the better listeners of the 16 Myers Briggs Personality Types

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#INFJ #MBTI #MyersBriggs

[aidadenisa]

We're bad listeners? Yea, no kidding I got distracted like 5 times while watching this and had to go back
#headintheclouds

[betz]

My whole life I believed I was a good listener until I realized I wasn't and was doing exactly what you said, pretending i was listening while developing fanfics in my head or thinking about what i was going to do when the conversation is over

[InsideTheMindOfAnInfj]

I literally need to rewatch this again BECAUSE I got to the end and realised I wasn't listening properly. I was too in my head. So yep I can confirm, you're right! Lol.

[melatonin_]

My extroverted feeling is so out of control sometimes that I feel more emotion and empathy for tragic fictional characters than my own problems.

[nmh]

“Feeling is not just emotions, emotions are only part of it. Feeling is the value that people place on things” -FJ

[nombnomb]

As a young and maturing INFJ, this is really helpful to understand why I do the weird things that I do

[Magical_Beats]

"INFJs say things because they want to get a reaction"
While I hate to admit it, that's totally true. As an INFJ, I do this the whole time; and when I am confronted with "negative" reaction, I bend and change what I say to suit others that are listening to me. It's a pain, really, and I am training myself to say the things I think of as they are, respect my ideas, and accept that I cannot please everyone around me. And just so you know, your channel is helping me a lot going down the road of growth, FJ, so thank you!

[laurenaspreyart]

For ages I though it was just me. As an INFJ I’m constantly aware of others behaviour in a conversation (and in general) and sometimes form a narrative in my mind or make guesses about a person based on the patterns I’ve seen.

I am usually listening but my mind is also preoccupied with giving the impression that I’m listening.
I always want to receive an emotional reaction which means I naturally want to provide one for others as well .

So I’m constantly aware of the social cues I need to make make someone comfortable: eye contact (but not constantly as that would be intimidating), nodding occasionally and “insert question about topic the other person likes here”
That doesn’t mean conversations are never enjoyable for me. I don’t mind doing this but sometimes I walk away feeling drained and feeling like a fake.

I wish I could relax completely and just take in what others say without feeling obligated to provide them with visuals cues of confirmation.

On a slightly unrelated note, maybe this is partly why I like movies so much. I can sit back and observe and appreciate character dynamics, learning what makes them tick, noticing patterns that were left for a reason, and find meaning in the conversations more easily because it fits in with the overall narrative of the film.

Sorry this was kind of a ramble.
I just felt the need to give an emotional response to this video 💜

[natalierullmanward]

Someone once said people only remember how you made them feel.

[Amravef]

Now I see that paying attention to everybody's body language and to social interaction is the reason I feel so drained after group conversations... 😅

[ComplicatedSimplicite]

Who’s scrolling the comments while watching the video saying “I am not a bad listener.” 🤚🏼

[joshwilliams]

Once you started talking about how we’re constantly perceiving the vibes and emotions of a conversation, I was floored. I’m always noticing who’s uncomfortable in the convo, how are people reacting, etc. It can lead me to be overly cautious when sending text messages because I’m always trying to predict how it will come off to the other person.

[Knves_ut]

The whole part about patterns and trying to “predict” what happens (and lets be honest us INFJs are right like 90% of the time) really hit home for me. I find myself always anticipating something happening. I have a hard time truly relaxing because of this.

[ianeLi]

That's why I tend to finish people's sentences because I can already see what they're trying to say.

[kraizer]

Video: .... Bad listeners
Audiobook

hmmm seems legit

[t.k.]

"why INFJs are bad listeners?"
*Me an INFJ going to college to be a psychologist*

[gigileung]

It's quite frustrating when INFJs (inc. me) are so attuned to the dynamics under the surface, but don't always know how to give the perfect reaction at the moment... (It may come to us at 3 a.m. when we're trying to sleep)

[erica]

Me: an INFP loving how INFJs observe what goes on under the surface of conversations. Kind of heavy, that's a lot of processing going on, but really cool.

[Adriana-elof]

i stare off into space and stop listening what my friends say, so while they talk about parties and stuff, i’m wondering why everyone loves parties and i don’t

[hibaelnawar]

yes yes!! studying patterns and body language, watching people’s reactions, who’s getting left out, who’s interrupting... i do these all. the. time. always thought we were considered “really good listeners” but this makes so much sense and is so accurate!! love your videos