Why Trying To Impress People Never Works (And What To Do Instead!)

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Topics covered in this video:
dr. aziz, confidence coach, build confidence, increase self-confidence, overcome social anxiety, overcome shyness, get more confidence, confidence tips, life coach, how to be confident, positivity, attitude, self-esteem, zizard411

#DrAziz #ConfidenceCoach #SocialAnxiety

[kararonin]

I've never thought about this before. After watching your video, I reflected on this and realised the way I tried to impress people growing up was to get them to think I was intelligent - I was trying to overcome stigma of being told that I wasn't smart growing up. I started learning Japanese at 18 because I felt people who spoke different languages were intelligent. I guess it's not so bad; I learned new skills and pushed myself.

[dingdongpoopoo]

I came to this video cause I just realized the reason why I can't keep up with the hard work required for all of my goals is because there's no one to congratulate me and seem impressed along the way. I think I grew up with teachers and parents who always gave me that praise and it fueled me to do great things but as an adult, it's hard to find that. Seems so silly now that I see that pattern in myself. I need to find a new reason to be motivated.

[tanyag]

Makes sense. Trying to please other people while loosing yourself in the process.

[nicktsangaris]

Such a great video, wish I knew this a year ago. I tried to impress this girl (which was just a co-worker) by literally changing everything I would say at work when ever she was close by. I would constantly visit her office, give her rides during social events, and create scripts in my head of what I should say the day before, all because I wanted to impress her.
Guess what happened? It got so awkward that she couldn't even stand looking at me for the last month of my internship. I got so anxious that I tried even harder to impress her, which only drove her further away. The anxiety was so intense that I couldn't sleep for a month, was always exhausted, and my sciatica injury came back.
I could go on. Regardless, it motivated me to read self-help books and follow YouTube channels like this one to fight my deep insecurities. So it worked out.
Don't play the "impress" game!!!

[marwanmohamed]

invaluable content to us who struggle and really feel the burden of that curse. I don't really know much about the youtube channels that provide content similar to yours but yours is my favourite, I'm still a little caught in my head but I'm nothing like I was, I read like 300 pages of your book not nice(can't find a way to finish it because I'm obsessed about studying it..) and it enlightened me that I'm not experiencing something uncommon and I understood why I was in hell, it made me notice some of the behaviours that were making my life that way(you never know they are always still lurking). I hit rock bottom a lot trying to win attention, the term "win attention" might seem not that dangerous but trust me at a certain level you will favour death over living like that, it's like always looking at life through a telescope, never feeling a connection to anyone whatsoever, family, friends and certainly, no one would trust you, hell even I won't trust me in that state. I want you to know that we are here and we need your content, at least I do, thank you.

[ruioliveira]

Hey Dr. Aziz!!
I've been following your work for a long time and after a while it's amazing how things start logically making sense.
I feel like the ideas around not being attached to certain outcomes (ie. impressing) and just surrendering to whatever is happening or will happen without resistance are extremely powerful and freeing. They make sense, I can see their power, but they haven't fully clicked yet.
Right now I'm on my senior year of college, 7am, I spent the whole night studying a 400 page legal document I didn't need to study because I have a urge to get every answer right in class and be seen as the "smart one" and impress everyone else (especially since there's another guy who I feel challenged by. Even if I get 20 answers right and he gets 10 I still beat myself up because I didn't truly prove anything). Although I can logically see I would be better off interacting with people another way and not focusing on this outcome, emotionally I'm just not there.
Aw well. Thanks for everything though, I really appreciate all you do :)

[fraavezskyrim]

You literally solved my crisis in under 10 mins!! I am insecure about not being cool enough and yes I seek validation from people (mostly women or guys I wanna hang out with...or rather and more truthfully, people I want to initiate hanging out with me so I don't seem desperate :P) I play hard to get so that they make plans with me and it inflates my little ego that makes me feel wanted. If I start asking them, I've been rejected far too many times and I've given up, but your words clarify how i=unhealthy it all was and you understand exactly the anxiety that comes along with it so I humbly thank you!!😊

[phillipmakris]

One of my problems is I tend to pander to people, based on what I've heard them say in the past and it tends to become obvious. Once I feel them start to pull back I then tend to act like I've completely cut them out of my reality and it makes me look like a dick when in reality I just don't feel worthy of them for whatever reason (perceived higher status in some way)

[I_am_awareness]

When I started watching this, I was thinking that I also try to impress people. But later it was clear that I try to impress to hone my craft or get that bonus or create some value. Usually it happens after asking them questions and setting some expectations. This way I know that mostly the end result will be a win-win, and if it’s not then I know atleast I did it because I felt the need to do it for my benefit. I learned a lot from Confidence University. It is the best course on the internet.

[Buzzzxzz]

i neeeed this videoo❤️ thankyou so much for making this video⭐️⭐️⭐️

[abdisamadadam]

Love u king u really help me. And ur views is worth

[poopyworld]

The way you talk, you seem smart and conscious, I like to listen to people who like to plan their dreams And their thinking is like big, and they're excessive so I like to learn from genius polite people so thank you this video was helpful for me as I love to search for helpful information..

[tj-bflp]

Everything you said in this video speaks to me

[antiquefuturistic]

Dr. Aziz, advice always on point and crushing those polos 😅

[ahmedkhalid]

i love to watch your videos thx for everything

[MegaDreamOo]

Your discretionary are on point. It's like that you have a phd on Social anxiety.

[snyder]

I noticed that I want to impress you right now by saying something cool that I did.I didn't had something cool in my head, but I was searching for it.

[mxlox]

Impressing ppl have broken A LOT of worthy friendships and relations

[jamiecee]

That's it right there. Why we impress others. We want Love and Approval. We want others to like us. But what we really should be ourselves...☺️☺️ There is a high for a moment. But you don't feel good after a while.What he said at the end makes since. Doesn't everyone try to Impress each

[gamerslife]

Thanks bro, i suddenly find my self, trying to impress others