How to be Happy as a Single Lesbian - Remember this triangle

Dating can be challenging and discouraging at the same time. It doesn't help when you watch films and you see couples get together. You scroll on social media and people are getting into relationships or getting married. It's everywhere! Will I be single forever? I remembered this pyramid diagram: Maslow's hierarchy of needs to get me out of that negative mindset. Watch the video for breaking down that pyramid and how I used the hierarchy of needs to my advantage.

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[Joseph-brfk]

Hey Risa Ru, I am a therapist who has also been a lonely lesbian for many years. I really like how you brought up the hierarchy of needs. We need to make sure we have a solid support system in the form of close friends and maybe family.

I still sometimes struggle when I see wlw relationships in my circle. M/F relationships tend to not upset me at all, because I have no desire to be in a relationship like that and in fact I don't envy women who are in relationships with men at all, even if it's very good for them.

But I haven't really felt that same debilitating loneliness in a long time, the kind where I used to cry and feel suicidal because of it. Part of it is because I have a dog now, who is my emotional support dog. She is there with me every night, we play together, we hang out together, she likes to be close to me, she will come to me for cuddles. She is my companion.

Another thing is that I am working on myself. I'm not financially independent yet, but I am getting there. I am not fit and as active as I want to be, but I am working on it. I haven't really achieved the goals I have with my hobbies like playing piano, learning Spanish and Chinese, and painting. But I am working on my Spanish and I'm hoping to be able to incorporate the others into my life more in the future.

Finally, I am waiting for The One. There was a girl I was in love with, but she didn't feel the same way. I've dated others since, but none of them really made me feel like she did. I want to wait until I find a girl whose smile is like the sun through parting clouds. I want to find the girl who I believe is a genuine gift to the world.

I know that my chances aren't good. I'm a lesbian, so my dating pool is already so small. I'm picky. I'm Jewish. I'm childfree. I might be polyamorous. I might be asexual. I'm autistic. I'm nonbinary. I've accepted that it might be 10 or 20 years before I get married, if I ever do. But honestly, right now my biggest desire is to be financially independent, fit and active, semi-fluent in Spanish and at least a basic understanding of Chinese, a painter with my own style, a pianist who can play all of Chopin's pieces, and a therapist who people look back on and think "i'm so glad that I saw that person." That's already going to take more energy than I have, so I have to pick and choose which of my goals I want to strive for.

[akiara]

One of the most important relationships you will have is with yourself 💫 being single also got lot of benefits.. use em and embrace your own independence 🧘

[nocando]

This is just what I needed to see at this moment, thank you! You're like my own personal coach at this point.

[realtrue]

I needed this! New subscriber! I hate being single! I feel like I can’t find anyone who is interested in me! I’ve tried gay clubs in my area and approaching women in person. No luck! But I’m trying to be happy being single.

[sunsh__ine]

When the pyramid/diagram popped up on the screen and I saw the bottom and read the physiological needs, I instantly reached for my water bottle to drink some water. Thanks. I haven’t been great at keeping myself hydrated, but when I saw that, it made me do something about it. I also took a screenshot of the pyramid ( @ 1:55 ) for future reference. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and thoughts :) this has definitely helped me with my thinking today. I hope you have a wonderful day.

[silvermoon]

Great to see you are doing well and thanks for updating us in your journey! 😎

[rachel]

Being alone is a good thing forever alone is a privilege to be celebrated

[Jasminejupiterjuice]

Why has this been in my watch later for soo long?? ❤ Hi!!

[icyperception]

Thank you for the video! It really helped in my situation! Life changing to be honest. Thank you for sharing your experience, thoughts and tips. Great job. Also about the impressing your spouse with cooking skills, uplifted the mood. I think a lot of people out there would like to try one of your meal preps. I certainly do!
Thanks again!

[michellefury]

Wow!! Did I ever need to hear this now...im heartbroken...i was with her for 12 years...10 beautiful amazing years...then 2 of drug use and abuse...i tried so hard to help her...but she's no where near accepting she has a problem...its been 4 months of being alone...im sad..really really sad but I'm ok....watching her continue to lose everything in her life and her manipulating me with unaliving comments thru text is heart-wrenching🥺😭💔

[Himayne]

THIS MAY BE LAME BUT ANY SINGLE AMERICAN LESBIAN LOOKING & INTERESTED IN GETTING TO KNOW EACHOTHER??

[flonomenal]

hurrah for self fulfillment!~ :3 nice video! :D

[ryanheart.mp]

Thank you for sharing this 💕 Needed it lol

[UniqueCommentary]

Im an beautiful single lesbian looking for something real and someone special to love, is there anyone special and interested here as well?!

[raqueltoledo]

Its a competition out in the dating world, kind of a brutal one, Lol, specially now that we have all this social media.

We are all competing, with the fake, those looking just for sex, and those covered in make up, fake eyelashes, and a fake body, not to sound judgemental or rude, but this is what I have noticed.
They're the ones getting all the Women.

For example, you put a natural beauty, with morals, that is looking to build with someone, and you put a fake Woman, overly made up, only looking for sex, guess who is getting picked???

There's your answer.
Another thing ive noticed, speaking from experience, this kind of surprises me, if they are looking for sex, many of the "Fake Women, " are Not, as freaky or live up to, what they portray to be, and some of the more low key, decent looking, natural beauty's with morals that are not the life of the party, or are actually the freaks, they are looking for, but, most wont realize this because they keep picking the ones that look the part..🤷‍♀️

Just like with Heterosexual Women, they are more attracted to the Bad Boys.

But, I can't stress this enough, people need to take serious the saying, Dont judge a book by its cover."

Its not always what you see is what you get.

[ssia]

Can i meet someone here i m single n fron bangladesh

[lovers]

Please God I need a girlfriend that likes to watch gl and reads Victorious(Jori) fan fiction 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🧎🏾‍♀️