Stuck in My Marriage

On today’s episode, we hear about:
• A wife worried her troubled marriage is negatively affecting her daughter
• A father wondering how to set boundaries with his son and daughter-in-law
• A woman struggling to forgive her boyfriend for secretly watching porn

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[PrairieDawnC]

My son is on the spectrum. When he was 19, he decided to live with my sister and brother-in-law in the big city 2 hours away. This was against my permission because he was struggling with his mental health and in therapy here. After several months of moping at their house, brother-in-law gave son an ultimatum about finding a job. No job materialized and son was dropped off at a downtown homeless shelter as threatened. I found out three days later. It was the worst thing that could happen and the best. Son marched himself to the company of his dreams and has been there 10 years, minus a three month stint to get his head -- and meds -- straight, with his employer's support. He doesn't make a lot of money, but he's independent, happy, and proud of himself. I'm thankful my brother-in-law did what I wouldn't have.

[TheUnlovely]

Delony is the most realistic counselor bc he never underestimates the importance of chips and salsa

[thermalreboot]

When I was out of work I attended 9AM mass everyday. Not only was it a peaceful way for me to start my day, but it kept me accustomed to having to be somewhere at 9AM.

[lpruitt]

I wish I could find a therapist as knowledgeable and compassionate like Dr. Delony! He is so personable and caring with a no nonsense approach.

[MiemieM]

Delony switched to the caller so fast after Kelly mentioned whatever he's getting tested for😭😭

[RachelDavies-wnir]

First caller should immediately ask her employer if she can stop WFH and go into the office. She needs to be in the real world with real people.

[lucyc]

I just wanted to share this comment, it’s not specific to this episode. But one of the things I appreciate about this podcast is that you get to witness in real time how a professional with integrity who wants to help people navigates conversations with people who hold different values. Just one example is that in my humble opinion, when Dr. Delony hears experiences about infidelity it goes hard against personal values he holds about marriage and commitment. Despite that tension, he sees the humanity in all and will sit with you and create a comfortable space that promotes healing and accountability. I think this is a big part of why this podcast feels relatable and accessible to all. Thank you to Dr. Delony and the entire team for creating this space!

[vitareid]

I like John because he talks about his own challenges like peeing in a cup. If I had a therapist that kept it that real, I would heal very quickly just by the laughter alone.

[jennifersteen]

Can relate 100% to 1st caller. My life in a nutshell. 22 yrs trying. So tired. So stuck. So suffocated. No family support. Basically dieing of this greif he speaks of. And getting sicker all the while. So, thank you so much! This is all very helpful to me. This gives me new hope to keep trying. I'm not giving up.

[themulti-coloredcanary]

The excitement in her voice when he asks her if she has a pen is so uplifting!

[AmandaJ]

When the Husband used the phrase "find himself" and then sexual issues. I have a feeling he may be Bi or gay, and is struggling to admit it to himself and wife because of shame due to religion. So sad, for both people!

[lillianjinx]

“Drown the relationship and blame the other person.” This comment really hit home for me. After 27 years of marriage, that was all I was left with…😞 I left him. It’s a really sad scary place to be. Time to start the road of healing.

[brightpage]

Love that Dr. D. Totally opened this woman's eyes to the fact that her husband is not responsible for her happiness. The responsibility for her life is hers - with the NP education no less! That lit this lady up! And we need more great NP's like A LOT so thank you!

[CJIncognito]

9:49 “You can’t do anything to change him.” Wow. I needed to hear that today.

[lydiasharpin]

I feel this. There was the last 3 years of my 24 year marriage. Thankful now divorced and repartnered with my first boyfriend from my teen years. My children adore my new partner. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I had to work on forgiving myself for having such low self esteem that I put up with it.

[jjkatz]

Feel bad for these people in crummy marriages. I’m so much happier single.

[AndiAlexander]

Kelly is 100% right about peeing in a cup as a woman. Especially during pregnancy when you have to do it ALL THE TIME while your body is getting as big as a house, making it practically impossible to get right.

[stevendavidson]

Dee, from Georgia, won’t start on the path to a happier, healthier tomorrow until she lowers the ego and acknowledges that she’s the architect of her own demise. Nobody in America is stuck in a toxic marriage. Legally dissolving a marriage is an easy thing to do in America. What’s not so easy to do is to admit to one’s self that they have failed. That’s Dee’s problem. Right now Dee can blame all of her problems on her marriage while also not formally acknowledging that it has failed. On the other hand, if she gets divorced then not only does that formally seal her role in a failed marriage, it takes away all of her excuses for why she’s not happy. Her happiness becomes 100% her responsibility and, as she confessed to John, she doesn’t seem to have the first clue about what happiness looks like to her. Dee went into her marriage with that problem. The marriage didn’t suddenly make her forget what happiness means to her. Dee needs to rip off the band aid, sit with the discomfort of it, and move on. Take the ‘L’, learn the lesson, and move forward.

[bryce]

I enjoy these episodes because I always find bits and pieces that fit my situation. When he talked about the other person tanking the relationship but blaming her, that one hit home.

[cindymc]

Really good interaction with the father struggling to keep a boundary with his son & daughter-in-law. Thank you.