How To Go From Weak To Strong In A Negotiation

Zelensky’s negotiation with Trump went off the rails. In this video, we break down the key mistakes, what he could have done differently, and how you can win high-stakes negotiations.


0:00 - Intro
0:35 - Caveat
1:04 - Who makes the first offer?
2:08 - Zelenskyy fumbled this essential point
3:55 - Do not beg to get your needs met
4:30 - Employ the "friendly f***k no"
5:32 - Don't push back in other ways
7:16 - The part where things break down
8:07 - The Karen Technique
8:24 - Zelenskyy gets into it with Vance
9:26 - How to recover from these moments
10:45 - Unprocessed contempt
12:15 - Always have a second option
13:27 - Zelenskyy's Fox interview
14:09 - Remember that you can walk out
14:46 - Learn to master your soft power skills


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[jonathansneed]

Your analysis misses one key point - it wasn’t a negotiation, or at least it wasn’t supposed to be.

[neonmidnight]

I don't think Zelensky could've "won" this any better because this was a setup and they needed a show where he bends the knee. It's not a negotiation where you're forced to say yes to an abject lie. I strongly suggest researching the subject better.

[monjapino]

Worst thing is: that meeting was not the negotiation! It was a press conference for US citizens/voters/taxpayers

[dyhppyx]

Your points are right. But the real question is how do you negotiate with someone who was never going to help you anyways.

[HazMat]

With the 'Karen technique, ' I had a buddy that handled that very well. I work at a Home Depot. He came in and at checkout, had an issue with a price. He mentioned the issue and the cashier disagreed. Instead of making a scene, he calmly told the cashier he was going to step out of line (so other customers can checkout) and said he wanted a manager and would wait to the side. The manager came up and he expressed his concern and got the issue solved. And I think he even got a bit of an extra deal for waiting patiently.

[eduardodiaz]

How do you diplomacy with someone who has broken twenty agreements

[JJMcCullough]

I think this was solid analysis and good advice in a general, abstract sense. In the real world, however, Trump has such a strange personal psychology it's very difficult to expect reasonable human reactions from him, even when the other party does the "right" thing.

A good example was the oval office meeting he had the other day with Sir Keir Starmer, the British leader. Starmer was extremely humble and deferential, going out of his way to avoid conflict with Trump or Vance, even when there were moments of provocation. Starmer even gave Trump a remarkable gift in the form of an invitation to a second banquet dinner with King Charles, which he made a big show of saying no president had ever been given before (thus pandering to Trump's vanity and love of spectacle). And even though the meeting went very well, and Trump was clearly appeased and satisfied, a few days later he still turned around and declared that Britain was forbidden from sharing intelligence with Ukraine. So it's like, we have a good oval office meeting, and a bad one, but Trump doesn't value personal relationships and is prone to betraying people, so.... what's the point, of trying to handle him the right or wrong way if the outcomes seem to be arbitrary?

[Stoneworks]

Assert your dominance by pooping your pants early into the negotiations, and lock the door so they can't escape 👍

[Kaiser]

48 Laws of Power #13 - Appeal to people's self interest, never to mercy or gratitude.

[Etherealsighting]

This was very constructive criticism that Zelensky could learn from.

However, I also firmly believe that Trump and Vance were bad faith negotiators and had every intention to blow up the negotiations regardless of whatever Zelensky said...

[a]

The biggest reason this meeting ended this way was because it was always going to end this way. Tump was looking for any excuse to abandon Ukraine, any excuse was sufficient...

[RetreatHell]

“Guilt tripping” is emotional manipulation, and NO ONE wants to be on the receiving end of emotional manipulation... Especially in front of the whole world!!

[ptother]

We’re analyzing a premeditated outcome.

The learning lesson is to not go into an ambush

[tina]

This situation, in my opinion, isn't really a good one to analyze for deal making. There is so much context between Zelensky and the US and Trump that wouldn't be there in a regular business negotiation. Zelensky's country has been destroyed, hundreds of thousands of people have been killed, Ukrainians displaced, and Zelensky has had to travel all over the world begging for support against Russia. The US has loss nothing supporting Ukraine but yet, JD and Trump disrespect, belittle, and be inhumane towards him and his countries plight. Zelensky's knows its about life and death for his people. Thats a very different set of circumstances being negotiationed under than a couple of businesses or atock options. Plus, this was televised. Behind closed doors we have no idea how people are acting when they're negotiating.

[lanciadr]

I think you have a nice video but some of the information and logic is not really there:
- Zelensky was not there to negotiate. He was there to sign an agreement. There was no promise or request for weapons or further money from Zelensky at this time.
- Trump was trying to show a deal as a path to a ceasefire, which would supposedly end the war.
- The deal did not include any security guarantees or any consequences in case Russia broke the ceasefire, which is what Zelensky was asking for.
- Zelensky was trying to make a point that Russia systematically broke any ceasefires and agreements in the past, thus for true peace to happen there need to be security guarantees written in paper.
- Vance and Trump actively avoided these concerns like the plague and changed subjects every time this point came up.
- Zelensky had to push Trump for it as Trump's team was negotiating with Russia without Ukraine's or EU's involvement.

The whole conflict seem to have started when Vance changed the topic about Zelensky not thanking enough after Vance could not address his security concerns.
Overall, it did not seem like Trump or Vance were truly interested in any deals, so you cannot "negotiate" with people who are not honest with you and are actively looking for a way out of a relationship and need a reason to present it as such.
Yeah, just wanted to provide you with some corrections.

[Curiousitydrive]

Love your channel! BUT as an American Ukrainian, you got one thing wrong about your initial assessment of what Zelensky wants. He wants LASTING peace. Lasting peace is different from weapons, money, support, etc. I'm emphasizing the word "LASTING" due to the context that is being suppressed by JD and Trump and the lack of response from both of them.

Ukraine has signed nice pieces of paper, aka ceasefires, with Putin multiple times, and again and again, that ceasefire was broken. Not only that, but Ukraine gave up its nuclear weapons in exchange for the U.S. promising to protect their sovereignty from russia.

No amount of weapons, money, or "we support you" or "he will for sure not attack with me in office" will work for LASTING peace with someone who has broken the same ceasefire agreements AGAIN and AGAIN—each time with destruction in human life and property 100X worse!

So no to your initial assessment. Zelensky wants to know what should be done to DETER Putin from attacking again. What Zelensky wants is either some type of peace troops on the ground, NATO, or—worst-case scenario—nukes back, which no one wants to do, but it seems like russia will attack anyone without nukes, NATO, or substantial risk or cost.

[Pandidolod]

This wasn't meant to be a negotiation. It was meant to be a show for the public on how the US has supposedly been working diplomatically.

[michellertom]

I usually respect your content, but I found this example a bit unfair. Zelensky was dealing with an unusual situation—Trump isn’t like other world leaders, and Zelensky is used to negotiating with those who recognize Ukraine’s humanitarian crisis. Plus, English isn’t his first language. I think a different example would have made your point more effectively.

[caffeinatedphysicist]

I have to agree with other commenters that imposing the context of a negotiation is invalid. Many actions and things that Z said were because the context is a public press conference. For example: repeating that russia invaded them. This isn't for Trump, it's for the world to reinforce what is true. It may be that that would be fruitless during a negotiation but it's vital in a press conference to resist Trump's twisted narrative.

[jaredmello]

The problem is when dealing with narcissists tactics that work with normal people have no impact on narcissists.