A Social Media Rant: Why I Hate Toxic Positivity

In this video, Chelsea talks about one of the most seemingly-good but actually-harmful trends on social media: toxic positivity.

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[sarahwbs]

Real self care is basically self parenting - doing what is good *for* you rather than just what feels good.

[irisedsullenssis]

"Everything happens for a reason." Or "Your thoughts create your reality " or "It's about the mindset." : are all messages that made me feel *ashamed* when I got *cancer* at 24 bc I thought I *deserved* it for not being positive enough. It really took me time to learn what true self-care means.

[NatsuMatto]

I was promised a "rant, " but instead got a well-reasoned argument. WTF? 😂

[stringsgalore]

As someone who has been therapy for 20 years thank you. As someone with chronic illness I HATE toxic positivity. I’ve had to tell my family like, life can be shitty and I’m allowed to let it feel shitty and I can feel shitty about feeling shitty

[verde]

The Disney movie Inside Out was all about this. Spoilers if you have not seen the movie, but in the end, it's shown that happiness is great but it cannot get you through every circumstance. We have emotions for a reason and it is very healthy to feel and experience all of these emotions.

[TshepoMohasoane]

*whispers* “which is really just the fact that she has a nanny that she never puts in any of her Instagram pictures” 🤣

[amb]

"... for many, mental health is not a question of will power. Mental illness is very literally an illness and for many people the experience of trying to live even a normal, let alone a positive life, while dealing with something like chronic anxiety or depression is akin to trying to run a marathon with a broken leg."

PREACH. All the Cult of Positivity has done for me over the years is make me feel even MORE guilty about the way my brain works. Or doesn't work.

[artisticromance]

The travel one REALLY gets to me. For health reasons, I haven't been able to travel outside my country in over a decade. Have I lived a less "experienced" life because of it? No. I've done tons of other things AND faced struggles that those people cannot imagine. It's the height of ignorance and privilege to suggest that someone who hasn't travelled has not lived.

[jefferyfelix]

Sometimes you need to have a person you can just vent to without seeking solutions. My husband and I let each other know if we’re just wanting to just vent or are looking for solutions. Sometimes you just need to get things out so they don’t fester.

[saltycrunch]

Toxic positivity is such an ingrained facet of American culture. It baffles people from other countries, I've noticed.

[Le_Inke]

As a therapist, allow me to say YES. THIS. This trend has been so harmful. Thank you for calling it out!

[LifeofKairo]

Still can't see the word "Toxic" without singing "with the taste of your lips I'm on a ride" 😂

[Christinamychas]

Those “that girl” videos on TikTok give me anxiety.

[emiliabolsas]

The Bubonic plague lasted over 4 years. Shakespeare for sure had plenty of “chips and guac” days in between writing sonnets.

[xgzzqsq]

The more I consume YouTube, the more I realize that everyone is trying to influence you into buying junk. Sometimes it's just nice to bake a quiche in the oven and have people over.

[mktemple]

One of my favorite ways to practice self care is to pay a bill, or put a little extra towards retirement. That always seemed much better than buying something...

[sheeatsfish]

"There are ways in which life felt eerily normal, and yet more slow drip ways in which the lack of normalcy was starting to accumulate in our psyche." is the best way to explain the pandemic's mental toll. It's been hard to describe, but this sums it up perfectly, thank you.

[tiaqmal]

This is off topic, but has anyone else noticed how 🔥 Chelsea has been looking in her videos lately? Summer dresses are on point.

[RamitaArora]

I often wonder how toxic positivity contributes to the overall cycle of addiction. I think this applies to even small things like relying on emotional boosts from sweets or fried food or coffee. How much are we relying on these things to keep up the facade of “being happy”?

[hyrunnisa]

Social media is so toxic most of the time. I have deleted Instagram off my phone, deleted Facebook years ago also. I never want to get tic tok and seeing it all over YouTube makes me so annoyed. The only social media I have on my phone is snapchat with only my close friends and family. I deleted everyone else.
Also I have chronic pain and this exessive positivity is so invalidating.