How I lost my identity but found my worth | Jeannie Woller | TEDxUSU

The inevitability of change and transition is petrifying; our identity is constantly called into question as things end, begin, or shift. As a just-graduated college student and former D1 soccer player, the largest components of how Jeannie identified had been stripped, leaving her raw and exposed. However it was only in that most vulnerable state, that she caught glimpses of the person she would become. 

Jeannie Woller graduated from Utah State University with a BS in English. She served as goalkeeper for Utah State University’s women’s soccer team and received numerous team, regional, and national accolades, both athletic and academic.

As an undergraduate, Jeannie participated in Ignite USU, a student speaker series held during Research Week. She was a 3-year member of USU’s Slam Poetry team, continuously striving to find a creative identity to pair with her overwhelmingly athletic one.

Jeannie works in Salt Lake City as a goalkeeper coach, a reading and writing tutor, as well as an audio production Intern for a local storytelling event.

Jeannie wants you to forget all these facts about her, because her goal in life is to not continually introduce herself with her past successes, but instead as someone who wants to understand how the mind can connect with the voice in order to highlight individual and shared experiences. She is figuring out a way to make that her career.

[jenniferwilson]

So wise for her years. This is how I feel about me after my career loss after developing illness.

[leahrivers]

So true! If we were not worthy, God would not have bothered to create us. Thanks for the encouragement, Jeannie!

[HappyPreciousGem]

4:29 Absolutely beautiful message! How many of us spent our lives attaching our lives to titles, only to feel we are lost, or lose our identity, just because those titles no longer apply to us?

[pennysmith]

I think you did a great job. you have something special about you. I hope you choose to be a coach or politician. our girls need you out front - leading the way. keep it going!

[oddjob]

I'm trying to find my identity again.
For years now I dont really recognise myself. I suffer from depression and anxiety and PTSD.
I had to give up on a sport years ago because of an accident.
I've had trouble with my identity since.
A lot of bad things have happened in my life and the person I was or thought I was just does not exist. I've tried numerous things to try and find out who I am but nothing works.
It's a horrible existence, when
you loose who you are, I long to be the person I used to be but he is just not there anymore. I'm just a walking zombie that just goes through the motions of life without really living.
No joy, no hope, just waiting to die.

[Rider_PSP]

Hello everyone. This was an amazing talk and I couldn't appreciate it more. I totally get what she's talking about as I related myself to an identity which was in a relationship with a girl for more than three years and when we broke up, I didn't know what to do because that's all I did in those three long years, to be her boyfriend. I've been really struggling from last 6 months as we broke up in March this year but it's been better lately since I started paying attention to other aspects of my life like my career and family. Stay strong all those who are struggling with losing their old identity to transition to a new one.

[maildiana]

Not an athlete. Just a mom. Formerly career-driven professional. Cannot seem to stop crying while watching this video.

[AsmodeusTechno]

Your speech was so inspiring and moving. Thank you for this, I needed it

[hixnbh]

Brilliant speech. I also felt like i lost my idendity after quiting soccer. I didnt really understand it at the time, but know i know better, and im trying to find my worth.

[robynkellogg]

Thank you for being so courageous. You are an inspiration to me, and I'm sure to many others. I wish we would ALL be open and honest about our internal struggles. Maybe then, we wouldn't feel so isolated and overwhelmed. And we could help each other become the best version of ourselves - as you have helped me today. Thanks again, Ms. Woller.

[nataliarosario]

Never related so much to a video in my life. I’m literally in tears.

[TenTenJ]

I love the way the light keeps shining right out of her root chakra :) 😇

[sarakarura]

Beautiful, she actually described me!! Thank you very much ❣️

[ashleyriosrizo]

Girl I have been there...still am at times. May God be with you.

[eddenz]

4 3 2 1 I tipped in a last shot under the basket as the buzzer went off but we were 10 points behind in a must win game; the season and my high school basketball career was suddenly over.
Fast forward 47 years, I take a selfie in front of a clinic I worked at for 36 years as I walked toward the parking lot. I’m suddenly retired.
Same feeling except more intense. You to a large degree are what you do along with the people you know doing it. These change suddenly and permanently sometimes. That’s the nature of life. Fortunately the holes get filled in mostly. Time is a great healer.

[annaadamson]

👏👏👏👏👏...wow, powerful and transparent. What we need today in our society is transparency...being true to ourselves and others. Great speech 👍.

[eddykuipers]

Kia kaha from New Zealand ( means Stay Strong) Great talk. You have brought things into the light here especially our addiction to external validation. Hits home for me! Thank you. 😎

[sacha]

been watching videos about identity crisis because im going through one and this is the best one ive seen, very relatable

[damonpeirce]

I really needed that today. I’m 30 and have overcome an array of losing my true love for a career I had and lost my identity in the process, I lost my girlfriend at the moment, I had to move house as well and still currently going through this pain and uncertainty, I know now that’s it’s okay to feel like this because I want to become a good person and move forward in time opening myself up to new opportunities without anybody or myself putting me down. Stay in the present and put yourself out of your comfort zone and things will eventually fall in place to your true destiny and happiness.

[jeremygodwin]

This speech highlights the irrationality of self identification and the problem of comparison. Unfortunately our education systems train us to be obsessive compulsive problem solvers (thinkers), self evaluators, and comparers. It also trains us to contemplate what we are to become. This means we are inadequate now but may become something of worth in the future. No wonder there is such a mental health problem.
For anyone interested in this topic, I suggest Looking into the philosophy of Jiddu Krishnamurti, especially talks on the ego, education, comparison and becoming. You may come to some very important realisations if you're patient and attentive.