This Is Why Doctors Gaslight You (And What You Can Do)

In this essential guide, Dr. Anthony Kaveh, an anesthesiologist and integrative medicine specialist, addresses a critical issue many patients face: being dismissed or gaslit by their doctors. Discover the reasons behind such behaviors and learn effective strategies to ensure your concerns are heard and addressed. Dr. Kaveh offers practical tips on identifying the signs of gaslighting, understanding its roots in fear and systemic pressures, and empowering steps to advocate for yourself in medical settings. Whether it's bringing a friend to appointments or asking direct questions to engage your doctor, this video equips you with the knowledge to foster a more supportive doctor-patient relationship.

Timestamps
0:00 - Introduction to Doctor Gaslighting: Personal Experiences and Impact
1:30 - Definitions and Examples of Gaslighting in Medical Practice
2:45 - Reasons Why Doctors Might Dismiss Patients
4:00 - The Emotional Impact of Being Dismissed by Your Doctor
5:15 - Practical Tips: How to Engage a Dismissive Doctor
6:30 - The Role of Systemic Pressures in Healthcare Dynamics
7:45 - Strategies to Enhance Doctor-Patient Communication
9:00 - How to Prepare for Potentially Difficult Appointments
10:15 - The Importance of Advocacy and How to Practice It
11:30 - Closing Remarks and Encouragement to Share Experiences

This video/speech/channel DOES NOT CONSTITUTE MEDICAL ADVICE. Patients with medical concerns should contact their physician. If your concern is an emergency, immediately call 911. This information is not a recommendation for ANY THERAPY. Some substances referenced in this content may be illegal, and this content is not a recommendation for, or endorsement of, their use in any way.

#HealthcareTips, #DoctorPatientRelationship, #MedicalAdvice

[WHISTLEPEG]

My long-time family doctor passed away at the age of 76 and the clinic replaced him with a young female doctor. I started having symptoms feeling like I was coming down with flu but not actually getting really ill. She did blood tests and told me it was all in my head and or "empty nest syndrome" etc she wanted to put me on anti depressants. I started to believe her (gaslighting will do that). After 5 years of this I had a routine ultrasound for someting else and they found kidney cancer. The specialist told me that judging by the size of the tumour, I'd had this for at least 5 yrs. I had surgery, and changed doctors. Older and wiser, I would never stay with a doctor who thinks they know all and does not listen to me.

[roseannemeyer]

Not to mention the amount of people who are left to suffer in horrible ERs bc doctors think EVERYONE IS looking for drugs. So tired of this

[SowingSeedsWithChristy]

The bad part of gaslighting is that it causes the patient to doubt their inner wisdom. The worst part about gaslighting is patients continue to suffer and even get worse and lose their window to catch things early, which is what we're always told to do - catch things early. See something, say something. If you must, change doctors. Don't let them invalidate you.

[ShalomUSA]

I've been an ER nurse for 25 years. There's an art to communicating with an MD because most don't actually have any people/ communication skills.

[jradonabike]

I was gaslighted when I had a herniated disc. I was downplayed like I was looking for drugs. And young man like me was too healthy for a herniated disc. Dealt with it for years. Finally one day after a workout it "slipped" again. I finally went to a spine surgeon and got an MRI. After he got the results he cleared his schedule and got me in the OR within 1 week. I'm glad he had a heart and a brain!

[MsSpindrift]

Bottom line: If there's mutual respect and a certain willingness to feel empathy, I can get along with just about anybody. But without those 2 things, communication is difficult if not impossible. I want my doctor to be a collaborator with me in managing my healthcare, not an adversary who wants to argue with me or dismiss my experience.

[catamazing]

It happened to me. My GP sent me to a specialist for my constant diarrhea that I couldn't control. I answered all of his questions. He asked me if I was vomiting also. I said yes occasionally. He examined me, turned to his paperwork and walked out of the room without a word. There I was still lying on the table not knowing if he was going to come back or not. He didn't come back. I guess when he left my room he told the nurse to print out some info for me on incontinence. He never spoke to me about my problem nor did the nurse get me the printout. I didn't know what the heck was going on. I never had ever been treated like that in all of my life by a doctor. He just left the room with no word about my problem. I told my GP what he did and she had little comment on it except that she was very surprised at his rudeness. A SPECIALIST!!! But they filed my insurance for payment!!

[GoodatNaps]

I had many doctors over 20 years tell me my symptoms were from anxiety.
Finally a nurse practioner ran blood tests and I was finally diagnosed with an autoimmune disease. Now I'm finally being treated and feeling better.

[craftypi]

I joined my mother for a doctor visit. She was having weakness- extreme weakness. And other symptoms. Excluding falling and unable to get up. I explained this to the doctor and asked for tests. I asked specifically for a cancer screening. He shook his head and said he’d do one test and wanted to hear nothing more about it. I found her a new doctor asap. Btw, my mother did have cancer ( multiple myeloma) and passed away in under 4 moths later. It was found too late to treat. I have a hard time trusting doctors ever since.

[francesmartel]

When I was a teenager, I had an old male Doctor tell me that my SEVERE menstrual cramps were “all in my head”….😡. It turned out I had a problem that just got worse every month and it required a hysterectomy. He was an incompetent ass.

[sunnysmiles]

I was having horrendous painful periods (massive amounts of bleeding) and horrible cramps for years, and I had a female OB/GYN doctor tell me “everybody thinks they have bad periods; and “our body just forgets how to have a period in our mid 40’s” She never offered any tests or ultrasounds. I finally switched doctors and begged for an ultrasound and found out I have a bad case of adenomyosis AND numerous large fibroids inside my uterus and pressing on my bladder causing urinary incontinence. CHANGE DOCTORS AND NEVER STOP ADVOCATING FOR YOURSELF!!

[SKiPHimm]

I recently had this experience. Thank you for bringing some attention to the problem of medical gaslighting. I have had 14 brain surgeries, each of them for very necessary treatment, and I never second-guessed the necessity of the treatment. I’ve worked in the medical field for 30 years, 16 of that in neurosurgery. I knew what I was getting into, and why these surgeries were needed. But, recently I had to see a new neurologist. Imagine how disgusted I was when he chose to completely negate the necessity of 14 brain surgeries (over the last17 years) by telling me he really doesn’t think the surgeries were necessary and it’s his belief I just have fibromyalgia! He then proceeded to tell me he’s treated patients with gunshot wounds to the head that didn’t present with the symptoms I have, so he thinks my symptoms are fibromyalgia related. This is a perfect example of a doctor who is scared (I believe my case is outside of his skill set, but he’s not going to admit that), so he chose to discredit the 17 years of hard work my neurosurgeon and I have put in to treating my conditions. It’s time doctors start putting the ‘CARE’ back into ‘patient care’!

[leslieewing]

My husband is a Vietnam Veteran. I was 21, pregnant for the first time, seeing a military doctor. I described to him what some of my problems were, especially morning sickness that sometimes lasted all day. He said to me, "What do you expect? You are pregnant." That response kept me from sharing medical problems with doctors for years.

[SpiritSeekersIL]

I work in a medical field and have an advanced degree, and I'm currently fighting medical gaslighting and incorrect documentation. Guess what my grad school research was on? Patient-Physician communucation, safety, and satisfaction while using the EMR. It can happen to anyone.

[heidi]

I've had a psychiatrist gaslight me. I found another the next day. Good decision on my part. Thank you for what you do; you are very informative.❤

[starlightlatham]

I love how this doctor gives explanations. I feel that too often doctors just don't hear you or just don't want to listen.

[robincarle-schindel]

My worst and most damaging experience was fall 2022. I had a double mastectomy with 4 drains and an expander placed. I the weeks that followed I developed malaise. I had had sepsis in 2014, so I knew what it felt like. About 10 days post -op, I started telling my plastic surgeon, my breast surgeon and my primary care, to please run blood cultures for sepsis. I didn't have a super high fever, but I felt awful and had other symptoms. I asked a least 6-7 times over a 3 week period. I was ignored and even mocked. Approximately 24 days post-op, I woke up in the middle of the night with a fever of 102.8, tachycardia, vomiting relentlessly, disorientation and felt like I was dying. EMS came and I spent 13 hours in the ER and then had surgery to remove my expander. Six days in the hospital on all kinds of intravenous antibiotics. Blew out several veins, no reconstruction and more opioids as needed. I have to wait until spring 24 to see another plastics guy. I wrote a lengthy and detailed grievance, which was largely ignored. I then wrote a "whistle blower" report and was lied to. Critical communications were pulled from my record, though I managed to obtain them from a third party records source. I'm currently trying to find an attorney, but so far I've been unsuccessful. I had an "aty[pical" presentation of sepsis. My doctors seemed as though they had no knowledge of this type of occurrence, though it can hardly be called rare. US docs need to understand sepsis in all of it morphisms. Ii am still suffering the after effects of sepsis.

[Pugsrus]

Doctors should always listen no matter what, because if a doctor gets it wrong its the patient that suffers. My story is devastating i was let down by so many people over and over again. My neurosurgeon cried with me when i finally was diagnosed. He told me this should have never happened to you. I am so so sorry. He even came into hospital on his day off work at 5am before he went hiking to see if there was anything else he could do for me. He is my hero and i am so grateful for his help he tried everything.

[MikeRobersonDaddyDoeBucks]

Dr. Kaveh, I wish every doctor could be as kind and attentive as you. You explain things well and have a certain demeanor that is friendly and knowledgeable. People can be comfortable around you. Thank you for the videos.

[monas.]

If I can pull myself up by the bootstraps and get myself to the doctor, the doctor needs to pull their own self up by the bootstraps, suck it up, and show me the same respect I’ve shown them.