How to Talk About Homosexuality in the Church w/ Fr. Mike Schmitz and Dr. Scott Hahn

How do we approach the topic of Homosexuality with our family and friends? Fr. Mike Schmitz and Dr. Scott Hahn give thoughtful and precise responses to one of the most talked about topics in today's culture.

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[JimCvit]

I led this lifestyle for many, many years. Growing up in a very devout catholic household, I was an altar boy, lector, went to Mass faithfully, all of that. But I always knew that I was different. Then as I hit 21, I thought I needed to start living how I thought I should live: that is a gay lifestyle. It was a choice, yes, a choice, that I made, and I lived this way for 27 years. Having been in same-sex relationships, having gay friends, basically "being" gay all around. But, around 4 years ago, I had this very strong pull, as it were, to come back to the Church, but I resisted. I can't explain it, but that pull grew stronger and stronger which later I attribute this to the BVM and Divine Mercy. Eventually I realized that I needed to make amends with God and come back to Church. I went to confession and started going to Mass again. I started to pray just a little bit and as more time went by, I started to pray more and more. Today, prayer, going to Mass daily, and to Eucharistic Adoration are a huge part of my life. I have come to realize that I am not gay. I may be same-sex attracted, but the two are completely different things. As Fr. Schmitz said, one is an identity that you choose to be recognized by. 

I have come also to realize that it's not about me; it's about God. The more I read the writings of the greats like St. Teresa of Avila, St John of the Cross, St Catherine of Siena, Francisco de Osuna, Walter Hilton, Thomas a Kempis, the more, as I said, it's about God. God is the ultimate, the supreme. In today's day and age, it's all about me. This is the trick of the Accuser. God created me and I owe God everything. I owe God my worship and my adoration. I owe Him my life. There are certain priest, Fr. James Martin, SJ, and ministries like Fortunate Families and Dignity that put everything on the person. They teach false love, false compassion and false mercy. They teach a gospel of love and mercy and compassion but forget the other main point: repentance. Repentance is key first. You can't have love, mercy, and compassion without repentance of your sins, but you have to accept your sins, too. If you don't, then there is no mercy. It's about humility. You have to humbly approach God and with your whole heart, you have to acknowledge your sins regardless of what they are. This isn't part of any of Fr. Martin's or Fortunate Family's agendas. Hidden behind a very thin veneer, they want the Church to accept homosexuality as normal. In fact, FF goes as far as saying in their beliefs, that no amount of therapy or prayer can help. This tells you right there how wrong they are. They are saying that God cannot heal the wounds of this sin. That in itself is a sin. Prayer with faith can heal. It might not change the SSA, but it helps you overcome the desires, the concupiscence and gives you the strength. But, you have to put God first and recognize that He is above all and you owe Him everything. If you don't, regardless of what your sin is, you will continue in your sin.


We are so overwhelmed today by individual rights, etc., that even if we were taught who God is and how much He loves us, we will tend to forget that and then become blinded by our own individual pride. We have to have the humility to go to God, who loves us more than anything we can ever imagine on in this earth in this life, who is there waiting for us to run to Him and ask for that forgiveness and mercy. We have to turn to Him and trust Him completely with humility. We have to give our day, our night, our lives to Him. God owes us absolutely nothing. It's us who owe Him everything. We want God, who never changes, always was, is, and will be the same, to bend to us and accept what we want namely the right to sin, and God can't and won't ever do that. Until we realize it's not about us, and it's about Him, we will be a slave to this sin or any sin.

[lukasmiller]

I like how you said “Your feelings or experience does not define who you are” and “There is no us and them because we’re all in the same boat when it comes to the struggles of the flesh.” So true.

[DavidGCG]

Thank you for addressing this. For someone who struggles with same sex attraction everyday is a battle. My desires/temptations are at bay some days and other days it hits like a freight train. Been physically chaste since 2013. Pray for me!

[drirene]

I am a divorced Catholic (my husband (after 30 yrs together) left me and our 4 children for another woman). Even though my pastor assured me I would most likely qualify for an annulment, I knew that really wouldn’t be honest. With tears in my eyes I picked up my cross and carried it. God has blessed me and brought me closer to Him, helping me through all the difficulties life as a single mother can bring. The sexual temptations were there, but with God’s help I remained faithful to His teachings.

[mazikode]

Father Mike is just a blessing to all God preserve him and bless him. Thank you Dr. Hahn.

[Mimse]

PERFECT conversation! Beautiful! Such a positive, yet faithful, antidote to much of the venomous talk out there! Mr. Hahn: "I think that we as Catholics have got to not only discover our weaknesses in new ways in order to appreciate God's strenght in new ways, but turn around and admit that with a joyful, honest humility" - exactly! This is the point from where honest - and still faithful - dialogue can be entered with those outside the Church (and within). This is evangelism that is not hypocritical and does not threaten with Hell at every corner and in places where we need to have the humility to say only God knows about this person's destiny. We are here to teach, faithfully, in love - the judgment afterwards (of us all) is up to God.

[michellembaeze]

I love Fr. Mike because he is not afraid to have difficult conversations. The church needs to talk about difficult things

[ObnoxiousCatholic]

I have same-sex attraction (particularly bisexualism). And there’s nothing more empowering for me than the Catholic faith to be honest with myself, whilst in a grounded self-control!

[anonymoususer]

Father Mike, you made a powerful point about how everyone has something they are struggle with and that puts everyone in the same boat. I don't struggle with same sex attraction but I struggle with other things that separate me from God and hinder me from living fully in his presence. Father Mike, you are such a great voice and role model for the faith

[hailmary]

‘A conversion daily’ - begins with humility 🙏🏻🕊

[joolz]

Yes, “There but for the grace of God go I”.
I love this. We are all fallen humans. I love the deep heart of Fr. Mike. I feel his grace. We must meditate about this. We all think of “them and us” in everything and that is not ok. Jesus does not do that.

[cptsil]

The first 5 mins of this video blew my mind away! Wow! It hit me hard thinking of brothers who struggle with homosexuality while my struggles are different. This established mercy and understanding in my heart.

[isabellfox]

There is so much wisdom and encouragement in this discussion especially the highlighting of self - it is so easy to become obsessed with this idolatory of self - this is without doubt the temptation of the enemy to draw us further away from the lord - and what Scott was saying about division in relationships/homes/families the enemies tactics are divide and conquer to pick off the sheep when they are away from the flock. And of course the world has put people who believe themselves to have what is deemed to be sinful lifestyles/attractions at odds with 'christian/catholic' beliefs becuase who better to tell christians what they belkieve/think/do/say than non christians/catholics who know absolutely nothing at all about those beliefs or who have a very twisted 'knowledge'.
If in doubt at least seek counsel from someone who knows what they are talking about or go to the source but be prepared to act on whta the lord tells you don't expect him to tell you what you want to hear, but he will tell you the truth if you are preapred to listen and hear and

[jpeltier]

This was so helpful and explained so generously, thanks.I have tried to say the same but it boils down to: They are us, We are them. We all need conversion. Daily.

[vickyg]

“Conversion is something I need everyday” - as someone struggling to go back to fostering and taking care of my faith in my adulthood, this hits me in the gut so hard

[catholic_conservative]

Amen! We all need conversion every day so let us pray fornour conversion and awakening of the faith in us and in our sociaty!

[kingofthorns]

Dr. Hahn and Fr. Schmitz are the friends I wished lived down the street. So smart, articulate, and in love with the Lord.

[crystald]

When Fr Mike speaks, sounds like the video is on 2x speed!

[victoriaevans]

We all sin, my sins are different than others', and others' are different from mine. I think they did a great job explaining this. ❤️💙💛

[ForRealsure]

I think I like FrMike… but sometimes I have to listen to him several times before I get what he’s saying… but that’s probably just me🤪…I try to stay slow 🐌and to stay sane…I’ve had the honor of dining w/ Dr Hahn and he’s amazing man of God~><> Good to see these two commiserating with current conversation on important relevant topic that needs discussion and pray for discernment🙏🏼😇🦋🌈🕊✌🏽👼🏽