Autism ACTUALLY Speaking: Autistic Gatekeeping

This week I discuss gatekeeping in the Autism community.

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[EmmaxHobbits]

Nathan bringing strong dad vibes today "kids! Get along! Don't make me pull this car around"

On the topic:
The irony of gatekeeping a neuroDIVERSE community is important to bring to light. Thanks Nathan!

[SuperNovaJinckUFO]

This has been a problem I've faced my entire life. I tell people I'm autistic, and most often I get argued with. I spent two decades working day in and day out to make it so that I'm able to function in society and communicate well, and aparently the reward for all that is to have it completely invalidated and be told (by people with no medical qualifications) that I never actually had a problem. It's kept me away from most of the online shit

[Ky-xhzq]

I had no idea this was an issue within the autistic community but I’m only a part of it online via social media by following autistic advocates such as yourself. It reminds me of the lgbtq community. I identify as bisexual and only a tiny handful of that community knows about my identity because I’m in a heterosexual relationship and I know how bi folks are told they have privilege over gay folks which isn’t exactly true. Bi folks are discriminated against in their own community because they are looked at as not gay enough to belong. It’s sad and I wouldn’t feel safe coming out. I already feel like I’m not autistic enough in my neuro typical community. Every time I tell someone new I’m autistic they give me the stupidest look! I’m sorry if I communicate differently than you expected of an autistic person 🙄

[himbo]

I came looking for a video like this because someone made gatekeeping comments on a post of mine on another forum. They were assuming they could tell who was and who wasn't autistic. They were acting like the non-autistic person who tries to judge us by appearances ("You cannot be autistic because you are married"), or by assuming that they understand what is happening inside us because of our outward behaviour ("You cannot have impaired social interaction if you are masking, because masking means you understand how to perform non-autistic social interaction"). So it was good to find a clear statement of what gatekeeping is and how it harms people -- how it harms both individuals and the community.

[unclebozo]

A little something to know, there is a difference between the "Autism" community and "Autistic" community.

The "Autism" community includes NT Parents & Siblings of Autistics, Professionals who deal with Autistic people (OTs, Therapists, Teachers, Researchers, etc.), etc., While the "Autistic" community is only Autistic people themselves.

[fenrik]

I was looking online for a place to meet other autistic people. Found like a group that regularly meets at a cafe, but it said it was only for ‘higher functioning’ autistic people, so I didn’t go because I didn’t agree/feel comfortable with that exclusion and the wording of it. Haven’t found another group yet, this one was like organized by the ‘official’ autistic community/group who organizes such things in my country.

[gonnfishy]

you are so correct, autism can often be of a contradictory nature within itself. nether professionals or “gatekeepers” allow for this sometimes, other times because it hasn’t fit their lived experience they INVALIDATE IT which... hurts the person they are invalidating, and questions the “gatekeeper’s” suitability for that role.

[alsy]

I honestly don't understand people that think they for some reason can judge others. It just doesn't feel right, to assume anything about a person without knowing the whole picture, and this is a matter of a long time, not a single post or a few conversation. I just wish people would try to be understanding instead of arguing over experiences.

[wolfwarrior]

I'm a year late to this, I mainly came here because Im neurodivergent and being told that I can't have special interests because I'm not autistic made me really upset. I have exactly what a special interest is, not a simple hyperfixation. It's so frustrating that wherever I go I think I find a comfortable and safe community and I get excluded. Thank you for this video!

[wizardrat]

I was scared of getting help because my roommate was judging me for not having my diagnosis yet, once they found out I was going through the process they kicked me out of the sharehouse

[AutisticRebbetzen]

Just found your channel today. I'm excited to add you to my growing playlist of autistic creators talking about autism! Thanks for making such a concise and clear video on this topic.

Off topic for this video but on topic for others: my husband and I are both autistic. We didn't know I was until our kid was over a year old. It can be really easy to miss it in the people closest to us.

[romuskalaputa]

I’ve never experienced gatekeeping before, thank god, but I have experienced myself getting frustrated with my fellow autistic friends on some socially inappropriate thing they do, when I probably do socially inappropriate things in front of them too. I don’t know if you made a video on this, but it always seems like I can’t get along with other Autistics. All of my close friends and the friends I have closest bonding and understanding with have always been neurotypical.

[wandah]

Glad I could catch your show today!😀 Ok thanks! Just learned the concept of gatekeeping! Seems like a lot of people use this gatekeeping tactic. On literally everything!

[Dorkable]

half-life is my special interest, and I used to be able to list the map names from start to finish. doesn't mean your worse or better at videogames cause you cant :D.









seriously though i was way more excited than i should have been at the fact that you mentioned half-life lol.

[Yesined]

Question from an ally:
Since everyone’s autistic experience is different and everyone has gone through different things in life based on their parents, childhood traumas, therapies etc… what would you respond to the terminology used within a lot of the autistic community below:
-Say autistic not “on the spectrum”
-say autistic not “with autism”
-say autistic not “have autism”

Would you respect another autistics wishes because you realize they may have been raised or surrounded by NTs and they were told that about themselves so it stuck …or would you correct them and say “that’s ableist language because NTs use it against Autistics to use functioning labels which are also harmful” ?


Like you said you’ve met one autistic you’ve met one autistic but when you meet many around the world and a general agreement is using autistic above all else it can get confusing.
Thanks for the help!

[minibus]

great video, one of the things i find most frustrating about people doing this kind of thing is the assumptions, for example if an autistic person has a job that does not mean they enjoy it or that it is well paid, secondly the assumption that their are less autistic or whatever because they have a job assumes that i was not a struggle to get that job.

[astraaijajansone]

A fun fact of me and showers/swimming places... I hate to get from dry to wet. I hate to be wet out back in the air. So... do you think that I never go into water?... no I just love being there in water and could stay there for a while. I only hate the trasition from dry to wet and back so it takes ages for me to get in the sea (never understood those running into water) - it might be 10 minutes to get in with those tiny-tiny steps... and then it wouldn't be enough of swimming any soon :)

[thanonymousperson]

Nathan poggers in the thumbnail /j

In all seriousness, thank you for this video

[andrewtaylor]

I can't believe I'm first, I'm usually late for everything😂🤣

[ItsBrenOakes]

Hey do you think the functioning labels are bad? I been hearing lots of autistic say it’s bad but some still use it.