The 3 SIGNS You're Dealing With A COVERT NARCISSIST | Dr Ramani

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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

[youngblood]

A child who's being mentally abused by their parent, doesn't stop loving their parent. The child stops loving themselves.

[RealnowFP]

My partner/Fiancé of 23 years was absolutely a Covert Narsissist. After he passed last year his daughter said to me and I quote, “Didn’t you know that my dad was a Covert Narsissist”?
The next thing his daughter said to me was, “Your finally free”.
She was the true catalyst for my research and ultimate healing.
I helped raise her from 10 years old and she helped raise me out of my pain.

[goldilocks]

This is what I have finally concluded over a very long period of time: if you feel extremely confused around someone and are continuously questioning what is going on with them, there is a good chance there is a fairly high level of narcissism going on, and even if there isn’t, this is not a person you want to be spending a lot of time around and the sooner you can exit the scene the better. In other words: for the sake of your own sanity, don’t overthink it - whatever it is, it isn’t healthy 🙃

[baronsworldwide]

"Manipulation through victimhood". That sums it up PERFECTLY.

[ceecee]

From having a covert best friend I found her top 5 signs were
1. Victim mentality
2. Constantly put others down
3. Always tried to dominate others to feel secure
4. Moody 99% of the time
5. Didn’t seem to have an adult understanding of empathy, love, morals

I’ll give you another 5 for free
6. Was very paranoid would ask questions in multiple ways to see if I gave same answer
7 jealous of other friendships
8. Materialistic
9. Poor relationship with family
10. She would twist my words and try to convince me the false reality was real

[NarcSurvivor]

Denial. Projection. Blame-shifting. Gaslighting. Double Bind. Double standards.

[marilynhoward]

I was married to a covert narcissist and I can’t express how damaging this can be for the other spouse. It took years to be able to reconcile how others saw him and how it was in our home. My only suggestion is once you realize what is really happening to you and your children is to get out as quickly as you can. Others will think you’re crazy, as he seems like such a great person, but you know the truth.

[eurolex]

I think the thing that saved me from my narcissistic parent were my siblings. Every time she would undermine us or victimize herself we would look at each other knowingly and talk amongst ourselves about how it’s not normal or healthy

[katarinalkuhn]

Sometimes when you think you've been a victim of covert narcissism, and you are now scarred, BPD, CPTSD, and suffering as an adult, you may also be exhibiting these covert narcissistic traits. I think its important to be really honest when listening to these videos, and notice if you recognize any of these tactics or experiences in yourself.

[youngblood]

It was never my enemies I had to watch out for, it was the ones screaming... I LOVE YOU!

[BonzoGal]

I had to stop listening a few times and come back to this- it was like reliving the last 7 years with my abusive narc. I can count at least 5 times he drove me to a dark, nearly suicidal place in my mind, but I couldn't leave my daughter to suffer in his clutches. I got damn lucky when he flipped out in one of his tantrums it was witnessed by the landlord and a neighbor, and he was brought in by the police on a 72 hour psych hold. I took my daughter, ran, and never looked back.

[madeleina_kay]

My ex ALWAYS played devil's advocate for the sake of having an argument. I once said to him "You don't actually believe what you are saying, and I know that. You are allowed to agree with me sometimes."

[flower_]

Great material 😊 what I've learnt for the last couple of years I've been working on myself is : 1) not to fall for love bombing, too hot too soon, 2) not to fall for someone who "needs"me, not to be a rescuer for anyone (apart from children and animals), not to put your energy into someone's life and neglect yours.

[naranjaamarilla]

A few years ago I left a relationship with a covert narcissist. I see now he checks all the boxes, all of them, 😱 but I didn’t realised it back then. The moment during the breakup I got really empowered and brushed away all my doubts about leaving was when he wrote me a letter. Ironically, he was hoping this letter would make me change my mind. In this letter he talked only about himself and the pain he was in and how much joy I brought into his life. But the thing that really grabbed my attention, the thing that put me over the edge, was that there was not one line about me in that letter. Not one line of compassion, empathy or love. I was an object, a puzzle piece. There wasn’t any ownership of the abuse and degradation I suffered while with him, not a breath of apology, not a hint of willingness to work on himself, nothing. I was nothing to him and my feelings didn’t matter. I took my stuff and left. Best decision I ever made.

[jeredquidlars]

Victims of Narcissistic Abuse, here are some Affirmations you can conduct!

1. I am worthy of love and respect, and I will no longer accept anything less.
2. I am not responsible for the narcissistic behavior of others.
3. I trust myself and my own judgment, and I know what is best for me.
4. I am strong, resilient, and capable of healing from this experience.
5. I release any feelings of shame, guilt, or self-doubt that may be holding me back.
6. I forgive myself for any mistakes I may have made and trust that I will learn from them.
7. I am worthy of a happy and healthy life, free from abuse.
8. I surround myself with positive, supportive people who uplift and encourage me.
9. I am grateful for the lessons I have learned and the growth that has come from this experience.
10. I am healing every day, and I trust that I will come out of this experience stronger and more resilient than ever before.

[sandyhenry]

100% I am 46 now, going through a Divorce with my Covert Narcissist... I was 19 when we met and empathetic. I saw a shy, smart young man whose family pooh poohed him. I unknowingly boosted a monsters ego

[lightshinesthroughthecrack]

I was 47 before I understood what my upbringing was all about. I am healing myself but I mourn the loss of all the decades I missed. It's never too late though ⭐

[inkystarz]

Not everyone with narcissistic defenses is a pathological narcissist… many of us who are the VICTIMS of pathological narcissism adopt their defenses to SURVIVE. Its extremely common to bring these tools into the relationships we have after without consciously knowing that is what we are doing. If all you’ve ever known is crappy relational dynamics, you will mirror that.

We must ALL learn to be honest with ourselves.

[LesleySASMR]

"All that child wants is their parents' pride."
That hit so hard. I'm 34 years old and you'd think that I'd be over that by now, but no...still hurts just the same.

[tinazapata]

This was my mother. She tried to talk my sister out of being a nurse. She always told us we could never accomplish anything. She tried to take credit for anything we did. This video brings back so many memories of childhood.