Not Like Other Girls

According to pop culture's favorite female characters, the very best thing a girl can be is Not Like Other Girls. But what's that doing to girls in real life?

Join Cristen to get down to the business of being a woman and all the Stuff Mom Never Told You about bodies, boys and the female brain.

[IanCaine]

And we can thank pop culture for adding "as long as your hot" to everything. Nerdy? It's cool as long as you're hot. Crass? It's cool as long as you're hot. Break all the gender norms you want as long as you still have an underlying 'feminine' beauty.

[jackiemarie]

What is annoying is how much of a difference society thinks there is between the girl who's "not like other girls" and girls who are. Like I am a cheerleader, wear makeup everyday, love shopping and chick flicks and Top 40, and I also love reading classic literature, and playing classical pieces on my piano, and playing sports. Fuck people who say that girls have to fit into one category or another.

[minishcat]

"I'm not like other girls"
-Said every girl ever

[lilacsmoon]

The 12-to-16-year-old me would have needed this SO BADLY. Thanks for saying it.

[jennifercermak]

This reminds me of something I've realized recently, most girls have little to no idea what most other girls are like.  I've found that the qualities that girls seem to think separate them from most girls, most other girls have, and a lot of the things that make them weird, are actually common.  I've only met two what most would say are "normal" girls, and dozens who fall into the "not like other girls" type for some reason or another.  Makes me kind of wish that people would look at girls more on an individual basis instead of lumping them all into this type that is actually not all that common.  

[StoneSaysHello]

I am like a lot of other girls.
I am unique.
I can be both.

[upatreeee]

YES. All of this. I spent so much of my youth trying to set myself apart from "other girls." It was a real life-changer when I realized I only felt that way because of my own mysoginy. Now I am free to like ALL the things I like, regardless of whether or not they're "too girly." *jams out to Vanessa Carlton while playing video games*

[MonicaElysia]

I'm so glad more people are realising this! It's okay to be girly!
Next time a guy says 'you're not like the other girls' say 'Yes i am', and let him realise that everyone is the same, and everyone is different. No one fits in one box. And it doesn't matter if some of the categories you fit into are stereotypical. 

[katyspears]

This reminded me a lot of the "cool girl" speech in Gone Girl.

[gaillewis]

When I was a teenager, "I'm not like other girls" meant you weren't shallow and materialistic. "You're not like other girls" was code for "I'll tell you anything you want to hear just to be able to cop a feel."

[emiliajiang]

I wonder why there is never a type of videos where male you tubers telling guys not to be like other guys. like you don't have to be tanned and muscular, you don't have to like sport or rap,  

[EnglishMuffin]

I remember going to a Mary Kay meeting when I was 18 and being utterly overwhelmed with all the happy, beautiful, nice women there. It was honestly scary to me. And then the more I got to know them all and realize it was all genuine, that they weren't going to talk about me as soon as I left the room or do mental comparisons, I just got really sad for women. That it's not considered normal for us to just get together and love on each other and only think good things. To want to help and motivate each other instead of tear each other down to look better.

[SapphireNinja]

I hear "not like other girls" all the time in the media but I never really paid attention to it until now. I hate how females are separated in two groups: girly girl or boyish girl. I am a female. No labels needed.

[serriayisasia]

I hate that the girl who's "not like other girls" also for some reason can't be a girly girl or she's fake and mean. So said special snowflake is a tom boy who hates dresses, heels, makeup, and the color pink. Because for some reason pink is evil?

[elllisknopf]

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for making this video!!! It means so incredibly much to me!!! 

[chickadeestevenson]

I think it also might go back to bullying. At least for me. The girls who did everything that "girls" are supposed to do, where the ones who attacked me for not doing it. For not wearing make-up, tanning, for caring about my grades and not caring about boys. They tried to tear me apart for it. I can't speak for everyone, but when I think "other girls" those monsters of my adolescence come to my mind. I've grown out of using the phrase "not like other girls". But even when I said it I was saying "I'm not like THOSE girls. I'm not mean."

[pizzapig]

Perfectly said, I was not aware that i was doing this until a few months ago, and now it's saddens me whenever I see girls participating in this behaviour, or the media pitting us against each other

[blatellidae]

:( I wish 12 year old me could watch this video. I'm so ashamed >.<

[gwkowe]

The only thing I could think of while watching this was that song in Mulan 2.

[suburiboy]

I'd argue that "he's not like other guys" is just as common a trope.  I wouldn't know if that is equally sexist, but it might me.  Or maybe it just has something to do with preferences.  People have trouble finding what they want, and when they find it they idealize it.  It happens on all sides of the gender spectrum.