How to Deal With The BAD Things You've Done

How to deal with the bad things that you've done? In this video, I share with you how you can learn to handle them without negativity.

#LifeDecisions #LifeChoices #BadDecisions #MakingBadChoices #NegativeDecisions #NegativeActions #MakingNegativeChoices #SelfImprovement #PersonalDevelopment #Motivation #SelfHelp

[ripetika]

I can't believe you managed to put into words the guilt and shame I feel. I did a very bad thing when I was 20. Possibly the worst thing any human being can do due to loneliness. I met a 15 year old at my college and dated her for about 3 weeks. I didn't have sex with her, but we did more than just kiss...
As I grow older, the guilt grows. I have tried apologizing over some time now, but I can't find her social media or any other form of communication. If I were to see her, I would probably cry. I would tell her how sorry I am. How I can't even live normally without something triggering the memory of what I did. I don't deserve to live a normal life. I deserve prison.
What bothers me the most is that my family and friends don't see it as a big deal the way I do. They say that I learned a lesson and to learn from it and move on, but I can't. I don't ever think I will move on. No matter how much I've changed as a person, I still see myself as that fat creep that was that desperate to feel love from a female. I feel disgusted with myself even after all the improvements I made. I lost weight, I put effort in my appearance and communication with people. I tried becoming the best version of myself... But what's the point now? Why couldn't I have done this sooner? Why did I do something so stupid? The reminder of my actions still remains and it throws me back into the mindset of self loathing.
I'm sorry for the long comment. My therapist told me to write down my thoughts whenever I feel like expressing myself.

[mariareid]

everybody does the wrong thing sometimes it called learning put things right and move on and live life to the full

[MemestiffGaming]

I've made incredible strides in my life, but I still regret what I have done. Most days, it doesn't effect me, but tonight, I am wholly distraught. I have done terrible things and have hurt a lot of people. May god forgive me.

[nessmess]

I'm here because I drove for Uber for a while and one day dropped off a mother (who said that she was trying to reach her daughter who was in an emergency at the time) before she reached her destination. I feel bad about it, and upon looking at the dash cam footage at the time, I realize that I said a lot of things that didn't properly communicate what I was trying to say. She was getting panicky in the back trying to backseat drive, and I was having a hard time dealing with that so I dropped her off early. She ended up damaging my car door, so I'm still pissed about that too. Driving for Uber at the time was eating me up a lot inside. You never know who you're going to get into your car or how they're going to allow their day to impact your car or your eligibility to be a driver. There's almost no support from anyone including Uber itself, so if I get a bad review just because I didn't allow a person to backseat drive in my car, this stays on my record for a very long time. My rating affects my employment. I hate the stress of this job. Literally had a lady scream at me one time for checking to see if she had her seatbelt on, and then I got a one-star review after that that wasn't taken down. Anyways, during the previously mentioned incident, I felt at the time that I was holding my ground and maintaining healthy boundaries. However, in retrospect I feel like I may have overreacted way too quickly and didn't communicate in the best way possible.

[TheStrategicKeys]

Learn from them, and become better for them. It's not always easy, but if we can put it into practice, slowly but surely, it will become a habit. 👍

[Nucleite]

I've been dealing with the immense weight of my darkest secret for a long time now. Due to my cowardice and selfish fear, I allowed someone in my family to be hurt in a terrible way. I had a dream that reminded me of this situation two months ago, and since then, I've been feeling daily shame, daily guilt, and daily anxiety over feeling like I will never be able to feel genuine happiness again.

Of course, this isn't to say that I don't feel terrible for the person who was hurt, because I absolutely do. I wish I had a time machine so that I could go back and do what I know is right and what I knew then to be right, but I simply can't change what's already happened.

I would give every inch of skin and every limb from my body to change what happened, to make it right, to see that person unscathed and happier. I often struggle with inspirational talks and articles because it seems that they use the most tame and common examples of why people with dark secrets about terrible things they've done deserve redemption and happiness.

It always made me feel that, because nobody is using an example close to what I've done, I'm too far gone and utterly hopeless.

I always feel like a monster, completely undeserving of love and compassion. It's as if I've casted myself into the outer darkness of Hell itself, that I'm completely alone and absolutely hopeless.

The decision to stay silent, to not do the right thing always haunts me. Even though I acted selfishly, not informing them of the danger, I still didn't want what happened. I tried to keep the peace by trying to solve it in my own way, but that obviously didn't work. I genuinely didn't want this loved one to be hurt, but my selfish fear turned me into a coward, and I didn't do what needed to be done.

Someone I love has been traumatized, and even though I'm only partly to blame due to my lack of appropriate action, it feels as if I'm still the one who did this. I know that I've never used my own two hands to hurt someone in any way, but this weight still burdens me daily.

Whenever I'm around family, I can't help but think how much they would probably hate me if they knew my secret. My father knows I have a bad secret, that it eats at me every single day, but he says that he will always love me, no matter how big and bad my secret is.

More than death itself, I'm petrified, filled with absolute, mind-warping, hellish terror when I think of losing the love of those that I love. I would rather experience quintillion infinite hells filled with bone-breaking punishments than to ever lose those I care about.

I can't undo the past, so I try to find other ways to deal with this hideous secret. I'm trying to get into Buddhist philosophy, to achieve happiness by practicing mindfulness and truly forgiving myself. A part of this journey of self-forgiveness is to come to these videos and try to imagine that what is said in these videos can apply to me as well.

I know that most people would look at me with hatred in their hearts if they knew my secret, never giving a thought to the fact that I never wanted such a horrible outcome for anyone. I know people would harbor a deep hatred of me for the remainder of their lives, unreceptive to any of the positive things I've done or to who I truly am.

Despite these fears of being judged, I'm voicing this in the comments because I'm so tired of suffering alone. What's worse than having someone inflict suffering onto you? Being a source of suffering. I know what both are like, and I'd much rather go through being harmed physically than to be the one doing the harm.

Anyway, I know I didn't say what the secret was exactly, but I'm just not ready for that yet. I'm incredibly fearful of how people will label me, but regardless, I needed to share at least this much.

Thank you for reading.

[lupine]

You're like my secret guru, when i'm in a dark place - I look for advice in your videos and you never fail to get me back on the tracks.

[part]

I gambled away my life savings over the last three years and then got covid and realized I have no money. That was a wake up call and now I'm building back up and my stomach has a pit in it but I am moving forward. I have no clue what came over me and why I did it, it's all a big blur. I still have ways to go now that I'm in debt and have no choice but to move forward. Thanks for the video

[suicune]

I've slowly realized that everyone in this world has a chapter of their lives they don't read out loud. Everyone's got a skeleton in their closet of some kind, even if it's just a dust mite skeleton.

You cannot change the horrible thing you've done. The best thing you can do is be the best you now. Because if you truly regret it, and would change the thing you did given the impossible chance, you are already better than your past self.

[lovedlavender]

Your past behavior defines you. You still have to live with the bad things that you done and live with the consequences such as serving prison, having a criminal record. People will still judge you for who you are. Sometimes your future is diminished due to your past mistakes.

[ohnoidonthaveanyoxocubes]

I was 16 and i never knew what I did was wrong but it was my first sexual relationship and i loved my girlfriend so much. And we had a long and happy relationship but I made one mistake that makes me feel horrible and makes my skin ache. Very early in the relationship I had talked my girlfriend into doing sexual acts when she wasn't feeling it that day and she's forgiven me for it but i still feel like it's gonna affect me one day and I still feel absolutely awful about it and I just don't know what to do. It never was sinister about it or got angry or was physical and it only happened once I feel like my life could be over

[peko]

I did something bad to my friend and I’m ignoring her now 😭 I wanna talk and apologise to her, as what I did was mean

[martinok]

thank you, you've helped me alot

[redhoodedgamer]

thanks man, this got me in a better mood quickly, thank you for making this video

[mervenovan]

Rafael, as always, you touched right to our hearts, thank you. 💫

[mariahthemarionette]

i was influenced by bad people and became a bad person the rest is on me

[UsamaBeenHidin]

For me it’s not just *bad* but *horrible* I just want to let go.

[Rie-stqh]

I'm here because I cursed in a word from a language which I don't understand the real meaning of, I cursed it out in accident Infront of many elders my auntie warn me to not sya it again I just searched the real meaning of it and feel really guilty and felt like such a bad person for saying it

[heiltecnne]

It is so common for our current perspective to judge our past perspective.

[OilOfGladness]

This is powerful advice, thank you 🙏 💛⭐️