Is it ever okay to go through your partner's phone?

IIs it ever okay to go through your partner's phone? I've been guilty of snooping and might consider doing it again.

Narcissists and toxic personalities are masters at creating ambiguity. My ex used to readily offer me his credit card after we first started dating. He'd send photos of broken machinery and take me on company runs, all as a way to build trust so that I couldn't tell real company crises from manufactured ones.

I later learned he'd created this elaborate ruse to hide a double life.

Yet going through our loved one's phone can become a hard habit to break. Sometimes, we struggle to exit toxic relationships despite overwhelming evidence of betrayal.

In this podcast, Lisa Sonni and I share our personal stories and discuss important considerations when facing these tricky situations.

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Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., a mental health specialist and author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationships, deconstructing narcissism, and understanding various other mental health-related issues. Her memoir, Love You More: The Harrowing Tale of Lies, Sex Addiction, & Double Cross, gives an uncensored glimpse into the dynamics of narcissistic abuse

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IF YOU ARE A RISK of immediate danger or abuse, please get in touch with the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233.

DISCLAIMER: All content and information on this website is for informational and educational purposes only and does not constitute mental health advice. Although I strive to provide accurate general information, the information presented here is not a substitute for professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this information. Always consult a professional in the area for your particular needs and circumstances before making any professional, legal, medical, financial, or tax-related decisions.

[ScrapAlong]

I really don’t like snooping, but once I knew that she was cheating I needed the evidence and trust me I’m glad that I did. I took 153 screenshots of proof of a three affair she had with a married man. I didn’t confront her because she’s going to lie. I have the proof I need so need to asked about it. I’m leaving on my own will (divorcing her) and then expose it later.

[juliezuvela]

It's interesting how they trick/justify you into trusting them.

[freddierodriguez]

I’m snooping because my gut instinct is telling me that she has had an affair, again. My decision would be easy if only our child was not in the picture. But because he is, I feel like I need tangible proof. I don’t want anything to separate me from my son and I feel like by having proof I can confront her with certainty and ask for divorce. I proposed her downloading a software on her phone as a step to rebuild trust but she insists that I should just take her word. 😵‍💫

[Cowface]

Sometimes it’s the narcs who snoops because they have an inability to trust. And they just want to know that they have that power

[peggyshobe]

“Hiding in plain sight” really hit home.

[TamikaTaylor-rlim]

Sooo true what you are saying about just wanting to look into your guys’ phone only to make sure he is NOT cheating or at least hoping that he is not cheating ❤😮

[AP-eymj]

No till I get a gut feeling and I deal with the lies and head games I have to to know I was right not crazy

[chrtyhwrd]

My partner has read my journal and throws it in my face. I dont have access to his things.

[tracieriley]

Yes but now they can hand you their phone because they have secret apps that you can’t see until they put in a secret code. So the cheater feels secure enough to hand you their phone oh and that is just another way they try and make you feel secure.

[AP-eymj]

And ill also say i feel even bad that i did that i needed to so its just something else to make us feel about us

[AlwaysRight]

It’s funny how attractive women don’t really care, but the insecure ones are more focused on snooping.

[thomashennessy]

What about a partner perusing another’s phone, looking to critique texts sent to friends and content she doesn’t like about religion or politics? She tells me that my views on th topics are ‘against her’ - and that I can’t have my own mind and still honor her. What about that?

[AP-eymj]

I thought god saved the best for last boy i trusted him and the worst man i ever could of bern with played me from day one

[sandrawright]

I found condoms that were decreasing in the box and lube. When i confronted vhim he said nothing...not a word.

[Confessions]

No it's not okay to be nosey. You should have boundaries in your relationship.