To Anyone Going Through a Breakup

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Nothing leaves you feeling more alone than heartbreak. You feel lost, afraid, and sometimes you also feel deeply unworthy. The worst part is wondering if you’ll ever feel happy again.

But there is a way to heal, and it starts with first understanding what the source of your pain actually is. In today’s new video, I share a way you can rewire your brain . . . not to ignore your grief, but to see it with fresh eyes and start to mend your broken heart.

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▼ Chapters ▼
0:00 – 0:47 – To Anyone Going Through a Breakup . . .
0:47 – 2:19 – Connect With a Newfound Sense of Peace
2:19 – 2:57 – Retroactively Looking for Red Flags
2:57 – 4:58 – If They Felt Like Your Perfect Person
4:58 – 6:00 – When They’re Not Revealing Their Doubts
6:00 – 7:51 – “How Do I Get Over Missing the Relationship?”
7:51 – 8:49 – The Idea of What We Had With Someone
8:49 – 9:35 – What Are You Grieving for?
9:35 – 12:13 – Happiness After Heartbreak

[glorialynn]

I've always said, you don't miss them. You miss the "idea" of them. And when someone tells you who they are, you need to listen.

[sleepy-ashz]

I’m grieving for what could have been. We weren’t perfect, but we were something.

[elybalderas]

He broke up with me, told me I didn't deserve the way he treated me. Now I see that in my mind I had a love story very far from reality. He doesn't love me and does't care what I feel. It's been hard going through this break up but I know some day it wont hurt anymore. I wish you all the best!❤

[saradf]

My intuition always tells me when they’re deciding to quit but try to hide it because they can’t communicate their feelings ! I prefer someone to tell me the ugly truth and break up with me, rather than slowly torturing me, being cold, distant or ghost just to keep me as a back up plan.. that’s the most cruel and coward thing to do , I’m sick of it.

[christopherkraft]

Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her

[paulotorquato]

I've been healing for the past seven months and counting. I deleted my social media and I'm trying to focus on my health. It sucks how things sometimes get better and sometimes they don't. It's been a truly rollercoaster of feelings, insecurities, and fear, but I look forward to healing completely. To be left by the person you love the most is the incomprehensible pain of all. Anyway, to anyone out there suffering from a breakup, never give up on yourself. May love come to find you and live calmly and truly inside of you

[SpyOnDeck]

I hope everyone watching this video finds closure and peace. Know that we're all going through the same pain. Stay strong friends, and trust in God 🙏

[Pandaluvthemusic]

My bf of 5 years was gradually distancing himself from me after I moved back home after being away for 1 year to build my career. I was too blinded by my love for him that it didn't occur to me that I felt insecure and anxious because of his lack of interest when we were together and minimal affection. When he broke up with me, he told me he was losing feeling for A YEAR and no longer saw a future with me. But now I have to thank him for giving me the opportunity to find someone who deserves my love.

[basshunter]

so true matt...in their mind, theyve already moved on weeks/months before they actually let us know it's finished. they usually have someone else lined up!!

[duan_meixuan]

The fact that my ex thought about the breakup for a while yet never properly communicated to me—and left because that spark faded 🙄—is something of which I try to remind myself when I'm missing him.

What makes me feel better, though, is that he thought he could have me as a friend after the breakup, but I declined. I don't want to be friends with someone who took me for granted. I was still putting in effort when he was withdrawing, and now I've come to realize that the person who is actually deserving of my love is someone who will appreciate it.

Thank you, Matt, for opening my eyes ❤️

[emilys]

What stand out to me the most is that you are right that he probably had this idea of breaking up for weeks, months in his mind. Yet he did not tell me anything about his doubts which proves that at this point he is not able to communicate as openly and with honesty as I would expect my life partner to. This helps me better to stop Idealizing him. Moreover he was willing to hurt me by breaking up out of nowhere, without giving any hints, without any warning. He accepted to hurt me tremendously yet he decided to do it this way. I don‘t believe that MY person would be willing to hurt me this much… it’s a hard truth to accept but I have to shallow this pill. Thank you for your great work Matthew, you help healing hearts all over the world ❤

[misterfister]

I meet a girl 4 months ago and everything went perfect. I thought that I’m gonna marry her and care for her even if our time was short. Last week she told me that she meet another guy three days before and he will be the right one for her. Im feeling betrayed and never thought this kind of pain exists. I hope I can heal from this, look at this text in the future and be proud that I could get out of this. Blessings for everyone reading this

[gunveendureja]

I knew I wanted to end things month before it happened. But I gave him the respect and courtesy of knowing where my head was at, when I started feeling like that. I communicated my needs and feelings yet, nothing changed. And he told me he couldn’t give me what I needed so I told him I couldn’t accept what he was willing to give because I wanted more. Sometimes you can tell people what you need, but there is a mismatch between what you want, and their ability to give it to you. And now I am having such a hard time because I had to break my own heart and his.

[meiyi]

The month he broke up with me, I also received a rejection letter from my dream school, and the death of a family member. I felt like my life just turned to a dark chapter. I moved to another city, the one that is closer to my home so I could always go back to my family if anything happens. But then deep down, I have to admit that the reason I left (more like fled) was because of him. The day I packed my stuff I cried so hard, every corner of the apartment reminds me of him. It’s been eight months and I am still sad. I don’t know how to be happy again.

[stef]

As a man watching Matthew's channel for years, I just want to appreciate his glow up since he got gold ring on his finger. He's living the dream.

[suziandchopstix]

I hope this heartbreak series continues because sounds like a lot of us need it

[esraarageh]

I felt it two months before he actually said it

[TheRater]

Thank you. Your videos have been getting me through the break up of a 7.5 year relationship. There was so much pain and insecurity all those years. Your words are keeping me focused on this so I can move on.

[faithsmeltingpot]

When I look back at it, there were so many red flights that I chose to ignore. And what that got me was a person who ghosted me and when he finally texted me, he told me you are a good woman and you will find the love you deserve. You know what I told him you got that right I will find the love I deserve so f*** off.

[APRILartz]

after over a year together, He led me on thinking he was happy. How do I not feel disgusted knowing now that all of my memories were lies? I kissed him thinking it was reciprocated. I cant help but think that this entire time I spent with a statue of a man I believed to be real. and then he sent a goodbye text and walked away like i meant nothing. no ounce of love left in his eyes.