'Women Learn It Too Late!' - UNEXPECTED Way To Make Him Want More With You | Matthew Hussey

Thank you to today’s sponsors:

It’s Lisa Bilyeu here with another AMAAAAAZING episode of Women of Impact for you to help you stop wasting time with wrong guys (or gal) and break the cycle that has you stuck in the same broken patterns every single time.

In today’s episode I’m joined again by New York Times bestselling author, speaker, and world-leading dating coach, Matthew Hussey.

And today Matt is here to call out the bad relationship tips out there and instead give you a blueprint to ACTUALLY find love in your life and STOP doing the destructive things that are sending the WRONG message and keeping you in unhappy, and even toxic, relationships!

In this episode, we’re diving into:
- The toxic dating advice out there that’s doing you more harm than good
- How your fear of being alone is keeping you trapped in unhealthy relationships
- Why what attracts a partner doesn’t always attract the RIGHT partner
- Why you constantly invite bad people into your life & how you can break out of the cycle
- How your mind plays tricks on you when it comes to relationships & safety
- How to distinguish between expectations in a partner that will make you happy & those that just feed your ego
- The 4 levels of importance & why they are leading you to waste time investing on the WRONG guy
- How to avoid seeing everything as a red flag after heartbreak
- Why getting vulnerable and sharing your insecurities with your partner is SO important
- The importance of compassion and understanding in a relationship, but too much empathy can actually be dangerous
- The healing powers of the RIGHT relationship
- And so much more!!

So listen closely, this conversion with Matt is filled with SOOOOO many dating insights that you can use right away to make the small changes in your life that will actually make a big difference in your love life and help you find the right partner for you!

CHAPTER MARKERS:

🧲 [00:00] Attraction vs. Compatibility
❤️ [16:07] Desire for Love, Trust, and Vulnerability in Relationships
🛡️ [36:51] Giving or Guarding in a Relationship
🤲 [44:43] The Need for Deep Connections
🚩 [1:07:44] Red Flags You’re Looking For
😖 [1:13:39] Fear, Insecurities, & Self-Acceptance
👉 [1:34:47] Bonus Episode: Case Kenny

****Bonus Episode: Never Settle with Case Kenny****

Keep watching for a BONUS conversation with mindfulness author and podcast host Case Kenny here to talk about why being alone is 1000% better than settling for the wrong person, and how your irrational fear of being alone and the stigma that comes with it jeopardizes you becoming your happiest, most vibrant self.

MATTHEW HUSSEY’S INSIGHTFUL QUOTES:

"There are things that will attract someone, and then there are things that will find you a partner who's right for you, and they're not always the same thing. And advice out there that works in some ways is very dangerous because of what or who it might attract, but it is very kind of self validating because it works."

"And that is like inception, because once you've internalized that…my reality is not the only reality, it's like it opens up the playing field for what's possible in life, and that's becomes a very exhilarating notion."

"In the story of Pandora, when she opens the box and all of these afflictions fly out, you know, disease and fear and hunger and shame, and all of these different horrible afflictions fly out. She closes the box because she's horrified. And the only thing that doesn't escape from the box is hope. And there is this interesting idea that hope, that there was almost, I think it was Nietzsche had this idea that the fact that hope didn't get out was actually the one bit of grace, because hope is the worst of all the afflictions, because the real terrible thing for mankind is the idea of hoping for it and it not getting any better."

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Themes: Confidence, Relationships, Business, Mental Health, Self-Improvement

[LisaBilyeu]

WARNING: I will never ask for your contact info in the comments section, that is someone impersonating me!

[GodHelpMe]

1. Know your value!!! (Do NOT doubt yourself.)
2. Take yourself and your worth seriously. You need to BE A QUEEN to be treated like one.
3. Don’t give easy access to anyone, at any time. Access to your energy should be expensive.
4. Do NOT only express your boundaries. YOU MUST show them.
5. Always be ready to walk away.
6. Show that you are focused on actions not on words.
7. Have a healthy degree of skepticism. You’re not naive and you’re not negative.
8. You must be willing to say NO and you must be willing to lose the man, if needed.
9. Never EVER chase a man! A truly worthy woman, (who knows her worth)
does not EVER chase a man.

Giving the same energy that you're getting
is key

and if you don't like that energy
then move on!!! NOW!!!

It can be hard
but that's when you need to choose yourself

over the damn illusion/fantasy.

A man who loves a woman will not ignore her, ever, period.

So...

If he ignores me

I will step back

and he will lose me.

Simple. Simple.
Non-dramatic
and uncomplicated.

I don’t,
under any circumstance:
play these childish-abusive-controlling
mind games.

I will only be with a man who values and appreciates me,
and treats me as the Queen, I AM.

(Daughter of the Most Hight; King of kings!)

Because I am a beautiful and kind and divine
and sexy and wise and intelligent and magical woman:
who knows my worth.

Period.

Also,

We create each moment.

This moment contains,
through my focus,
both positive and negative...

I can put my attention on what I lack,
what I don't have,
what traumas I do have etc...
And,

I can put my attention on the calm moment that I am in, NOW,
the food I just ate, and the fact that my body is satisfied, the shelter I do have...

(You get my idea!)

Both are here...
And now.

For the sake of fairness,
I will allow myself to cry my pains, in the moment
if/when they come/arise,
AND

also acknowledge the beauty I still have in my life NOW.

Pain? Yes.
Suffering? Indeed.
And,
also:
wonderous magical divine beauty.

Blessings to you!

[jane]

Sometimes we are in pain because we're breaking up with a fantasy, not realizing it's better we're not with the reality of who the person is!

[melissazoubek]

I married my first husband, had two daughters we were together 20 years, I’m now going ten years with my second husband. I’ve also been proposed to a few times. So it can happen. I just didn’t waste much time on men who weren’t into me, and I watched what they did instead of listening to what they said.❤

[Katrica]

"Choose someone who your soul wants, Not your ego!"

[Hopeful]

Your person can never be someone who doesn’t choose you

[mynameisana]

If someone is ghosting me and it’s affecting me it’s bullshit advice to pretend not to be affected. It’s strong to show that it affects you and then close the door. Tell them and then move on. 🤷🏻‍♀️ fuck playing mind games. I like being me.

[melliecrann-gaoth]

Skilled liars present themselves as loyal and trustworthy.

[belindam.]

He is absolutely 💯 right!! People are not being their true authentic self enough these days. Yes, we are shamed for expressing what we truly desire.

[EcoworksFL]

If someone hasn't texted me back for 5 days, they're automatically deleted and ignored. When someone shows you they don't care, dont give them the opportunity to do it twice as the chances are they will surely do it again. Dont encourage this bare minimal low effort behaviour

[Meglemon]

I’m never married, no kids. Sometimes feel lonely, but most of my life time being with myself is less trouble. Still looking forward to having a family of my own…

[staceywood]

I’m soooo over dating. This is all good advice/steps to communicate more open and authentic.. but why the hell does it have to be so damn So over it all.

[Katrica]

"Curiosity, teamwork, generosity, empathy, compasion cure incompatibility!"

[AddColorLife]

I enjoy being single. But sometimes I miss not having that one person in my life who always has my back.

[mgschnootz]

Over the last couple years I have either lost friends or it changed the relationship immensely because I am no longer vibing on a lower level and have done the deep dive work on me. So when they come and want the " bonding over bitching " validation, I give them insight from a different prospective. Sadly this has not been well received. But I have drawn in more stable type people. It's a very strange dynamic. But has been an amazing life lesson ❤
Love your content Lisa, simply amazing.... keep it coming 💪🏻

[joanofarcxxi]

Problem nowadays is the games people play. There is little authenticity. A relationship is not going to succeed if people are not real and show their genuine flaws and insecurities. Few people are that brave because they are so broken and weak. It takes guts to be real.

[Katrica]

Choose your person! Your person would Always choose you!

[EMuro-wuuy]

I found a terrific man who shows love, affection and care. I am working on an amazing relationship where our needs are all met. I don't go by the rules, where it feels that it's playing a game.

[trinityp]

Dying alone… unfortunately everyone will die alone. Even if surrounded by someone, ultimately the experience of dying we will face alone.
It’s living alone what’s worse. Because life isn’t 💯 complete when not shared.

[irinachillyvalley]

While listening this guy - I just had to get my notebook to write down things that really open eyes 🥰