You Don't Have to Defend Yourself | How Not To Be Defensive

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YOU DON'T HAVE TO DEFEND YOURSELF | HOW NOT TO BE DEFENSIVE
Being defensive is something we all feel at times - for some of us, a lot of the time. And regardless of why we're feeling it, the truth is, it's not good for us or our relationships.
In today’s episode of Good for Me TV we're talking about the big 3 reasons we get defensive, how to not be defensive and the key mindset shifts necessary to help us realized that we don't actually even have to defend ourselves in the first place.

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Come connect with me on social:

[juliakristinamah]

Which one of these mindset shifts did you need to have most today?

[unleashingpotential-psycho]

Never defend yourself to others because other people don’t really have the right to determine your value or worth. 🔥

[sandradibiaso]

Mean and disrespectful people make me defensive.

[sophiadavenport]

These thoughts can come from having a physically and emotionally abusive parent.

[NancyDaCostaTV]

Defensiveness is a telling sign of insecurity/low self-esteem. I used to be very defensive at times (because I was insecure and had low self-esteem). I've since learned that part of having good self-esteem is being ok with not needing approval from others. It's something that I share with people as well.

[nunyabiznush]

You don't need other people's attention or validation to exist or be happy. I live by this mantra. 😊

[anklesockson]

I think it is best to not care so much what others think, it's harder than it sounds though. Thank you for the video.

[nubbosaur]

I've always struggled with needing to be "right" and I end up being ashamed of myself after I go off on people I love. Its frustrating because they're the people I should be the least defensive with.

[Idlehands]

My insecurities are insane :) I often find myself comparing myself to other people that I don’t even know, but they ask me something in my head so I can defend myself. Then I realize I am drifted out of my present moment, then self criticism comes home. And I am really trying to be normal person. Everyday.

[anib]

I hate when people act like they know me, like coworkers that literally my interaction trough the day is "hi" "bye" idk why people get this delusion that just cause you see somebody everyday you know them, lol. It's like they literally create a whole persona out of nothing cause you give them nothing.

[sharonsteadman]

I've been called stubborn all my life and this is why. I have some internal NEED to be right and to be understood.

[jeffrman]

It took me a long time to realize that my argumentative nature ultimately stems from my insecurities.

[kennethhasuik]

I've learned a longtime ago the best way to respond to criticism is handle it with grace and kindness.

[greenietree]

This happens for me when I am feeling misunderstood. Recently I had two conversations with family & friends where I was feeling angry because they didn’t seem to understand me. The bigger reveal from your vid is to look closer at ‘Why’ I feel I need for them to understand me?? Thank you

[Omari]

It's not being defensive, its setting boundaries. People are only going to do what you allow them to do.

[obertbrinley]

Sometimes I get tired of stepping aside when I know that I am right. When do I get to be recognized for being right?

[jeromecastonguay]

Great video,
I just realized that at 62 that I am a highly defensive person. I have always pushed and attacked everyone I come in contact with and going back to my earliest memories.

This stops now.

My loving wife has mentioned over the years that I do not seem happy and now I understand that I have a character flaw that needs to be addressed and I know that I can fix it and it must be fixed so I can tell her honestly that yes now I am happy because I want to be happy and share my happiness with others.

I intended to treat myself like a recovering addict, so now I can never again think that I am being attacked during any conversation. I will need counselling and many books/ your type of videos to insure I stay nice. I started to make amends to all the people I have ever known.

Thank you and yes yes yes I have subscribed, rang that bell 🔔 and downloaded this video for mediate use ie: my new Mantra.

[joannajohnston]

Thank you. I really needed to hear this. I relate most to the first point. That someone has judged or criticised me and I don't like how they view me. What has shifted for me is that why do I need them to see me in a certain way if I know who I am? This is life changing for me. Thank you so much.

[dymphnatherese]

You made this specific video when I needed it most. I can't thank you enough for how much your work has helped me change my life to one I love living. Your insight helps us fight the good fight and changes the world one healing heart at a time. God bless you

[ArtemisSilverBow]

I couldn't care less what toxic people think; I care about how nastily they treat others and me because of what they think.