What It's Actually Like To Be Both ADHD And Autistic

What are some tricks you've learned to navigate this world as a Neurodivergent Costumer? Comment below. Let's help each other out.
I'm delving into what it feels like to be both ADHD and Autistic.
#audhd #autisticadult #actuallyautistic

I am aware that the camera angles can be intense. Welcome to my life.
In video form. Bon Appetite! Obviously I can laugh about this because it's my life but please do be respectful when talking about other people's experiences!

[benwilson]

Autism craves routine and stability because it's less anxiety inducing but then adhd craves chaos and novelty that you feel like you are going insane from repetition and boredom.

[DavidCruickshank]

That whole 'my brain wants everything to stay the same but also wants novelty" bit is so true!!!

[dsathreads]

I’m establishing a boundary here. If anything is said that even subtly asserts superiority and dominance due to neurotypical beliefs that their brains are better and we “suffer” I will erase it. I’m not even slightly tolerating thinly veiled attempts to make people a charity case.

[Rockwith_gyu]

Me being so annoyed when my mom’s always humming and singing around the house, while doing the exact same thing but probably like 10x more annoying

[derpp]

I’ve been struggling with ADHD my entire life, but I have traits that don’t match adhd. I keep suggesting to my team that I have autism as well, but no one believes me. Not because they know about ADHD and autism, but because my sister is autistic and I’m not like her. No one realizes that because I have adhd, autism will look different in me. I’m glad there are people I can relate to, like you :)

[geraintwd]

Important note here, as recently as 2013 it was not possible to get a diagnosis for both. They were considered to be mutually exclusive, but it's actually really common to have both.

[Petertwohig]

I'm 75. I look back and think I was normal, but no. I'm surrounded by unfinished projects; I can't wait to do SOMETHING. But it has to be a special interest. I'm exhausted. My mother had ADHD and masked like hell. She was also constantly beat. 'Gee, Lois, how do you do it?' they would say. Now I know.

[afoolinherfolly]

My big trick is to default to unconditional self-love and acceptance. We were conditioned that we're wrong and must function differently or we won't survive. When I find myself in a loop feeling like I can't function, I remember that I am not broken or a mistake. When I keep my body and connectedness top priorities, and remember to focus on my own voice and what actually belongs to me, life always gives me that next direction and speaks to me in ways I understand.

[AndreaIris]

Honestly i have not been diagnosed, but I have strong suspicion that I have both... this video made me feel so seen that like i feel like I need to hide in a dark place for a couple hours to stim and not be perceived anymore thank you very much

[ajilanpotter]

I've been suspecting an ADHD and Autism dual diagnosis for myself for a while and this video has basically echoed everything I've been trying to explain for the last year 🙏

[SciFiCheerGirl]

That mask drop...I felt that. Thank you for this!

[rebeccacuthbertson]

As someone who isn't Neurodivergent, your explanation of how your ADHD side of the brain and Autistic side of the brain relate to and help (or hinder) each other was very clear to understand (and entertaining!). Thank you for sharing and therefore educating us Neurotypicals so we can be better friends, family members, support people, more empathic etc.

<3 DottsandLace

[dsathreads]

Does anyone else relate? Also what have you learned to trick yourself into doing things? Lol I feel like procrastination works in favor of the ADHD but then freaks Autism OUT.

[melsgalleria]

I wasn't diagnosed with adhd until I was in my late 20's and it didn't get treated until I was 36 years old. After a year of adhd treatment, and 9 months of therapy for adhd, I began to realize there were aspects of my mind that I still didn't quite understand. Aspects that weren't explained by adhd. Then I found channels like this one and several others, and now I am beginning to understand why I have struggled most of my life. Why even after getting an adhd diagnosis, I still couldn't fully relate to adhd people either. It also explained why adhd people made me feel exhausted. Now it is starting to make so much more sense. I still haven't officially been diagnosed with autisim, but boy does it fit like a glove.

[PLPCPLAPD]

It's quite tragic and at the same time comical that I'm almost 33, and only just now having realized I so incredibly obviously also have ADHD. It only hit me when I tried amphetamine in an attempt to help with my constant autistically induced exhaustion; I only expected to feel lively and not exhausted or tired, but what happened was I felt like a functioning human for the first time in my life. I started cleaning my apartment for the first time in about 2 years (since my last great burnout) and I didn't face any relevant mental resistance, it actually felt good, and I started producing music in Fruity Loops which I had tried to get into for the past 3 years but only managed to stay engaged in for a few days with months in between, work started going smoothly despite it being extremely lacking in stimulation, and overall I can now just do things without having that mental barrier of "I don't HAVE to do that, so WHY should I do it?", which I now realize is not my autism, it's my freaking undiagnosed ADHD...

But what's most tragic about it is that no one else, not even my parents (especially my father, who to this day keeps commenting on how I "talk too much" and that I apparently "don't let others get a chance to speak", which I do, but if you talk about something you've got to do it right and go through the relevant details and nuances of the topic, how could you otherwise discuss anything interesting? Anyway, I digress, the point is that now that I've looked back on my life decisions and behavior, I realize that all the things I couldn't explain such as why I can't be motivated to do the things I should, only the things I absolutely MUST do and the things that I feel like doing, that give great stimulus such as playing video games and talking to a neurodivergent friend about all the interesting topics there is such as psychology, business, the universe etc, why I can't plan my life for the life of me, manage my economy, how I could be so impulsive as to apply for random interesting courses at several universities, and moving to a completely different city 3 hours away from my home town WITHOUT EVEN HAVING SECURED A PLACE TO STAY FOR THE WHOLE SEMESTER... I was even interviewed by a local newspaper because I was staying for up to 3 months at a conference center who offered to lease their cabins temporarily to students, and so they were doing a story on how that's a great thing or whatever, and there I am, literally saying that "if I don't find a place to stay I guess I'll have to camp in a tent"... Looking back on this I've always thought it was so weird how I could be so spontaneous and not plan in through to such a basic level that even a neurotypical would do a much better job; and yet here I am, quite severely autistic, but I don't care for planning and having structure in my life?

It didn't make sense, and to top it all off I didn't apply to a full program, because I didn't meet the requirements due to not having a passable grade in the second part of high school math. I tried to retake the course, and I understood the math quite easily, but just as in high school I couldn't take the torture of sitting there and doing the actual math, because I can't trick my brain to do something it knows is COMPLETELY worthless and gives me NO stimuli, instead it requires an enormous amount of focus and mental energy, but understanding the logic of the calculations comes quite naturally to me, and so I asked if I could do a verbal exam, demonstrating I had fully understood the theorems or whatever, but I was denied and so shortly after I dropped out, halfway through the semester.

In summary, not because there's nothing more to say, but because I have to go to bed 3 hours ago, pretty much all of my life, behavior and the way my thoughts keep running at a fast pace unless I hyper focus on something etc, it all makes sense now and I can start living my life FOR REAL at 33... Better than 50 I guess, but it would have been kind of nice if they had diagnosed me and given me the amphetamines from an early age so I could've actually managed school in accordance with my academic capacity, which is quite a bit larger than the regular neurotypical; it's quite noticeable because they have to study for hours each night while I play video games and only attend university classes, not even purchasing the course literature, and yet I understand everything just by having someone summarize it from their notes and soon become some sort of a study assistant to the classmates who actually saw value in and appreciated my competence instead of shunning me out of jealousy... Anyway, feels great to finally know why I am the way I am in a holistic way, having all the pieces of the puzzle, and hope you all will be able to live a good life in the neurotypical world, hard as that may be...

[isabellepantelll]

It’s funny the way you’re talking about your projects and getting depressed towards the end of them to the point of not wanting to do another one, that’s exactly how I feel about reading books. There are books I really love and when hyper-focus kicks in I could read for hours, but will also take extended periods of time off from reading because I don’t want to finish it and it to be over ever. I just got my ASD diagnosis last year but now I’m pretty certain I have adhd inattentive type, I relate to this video so much, thank you!

[vasgolyo]

I got my ASD diagnosis recently but I've always resoneted with ADHD as well and people don't seem to notice it because they cancel each other out. Your explanation is basically the way I feel 24/7.

[lorenhibdon]

The monotone voice thing struck me. I do that as well by the end of the day when I can finally unmask or I’m super disinterested or hyper focused on something. Comforting to hear I’m not alone. I’ve never heard someone else say that. Thanks for the video.

[carrollkinkade]

WOW! I'm a 74 yr woman and beginning my journey of diagnosis (outside of depression and anxiety since I was 14). . . . . . this video is like a walk in my world! I asked my therapist about an autism diagnosis and she talked to my primary and I got a referral then found that the specialist only reviews for ADHD - at first I was offended/felt deceived. Now I'm thinking two things a) perhaps I need the ADHD diagnosis to move to the next stage of discovery and b) perhaps I am both and that too explains so very much! Thank you for sharing your experience!

[photasticimages]

Very late diagnosed AuDHD and yes, this is exactly how it's been for me my whole life.