Why is the relationship between father & son fear-driven & distant and how can we fix this?

[fatimahabdul]

I think the sheikh didn't understand the question. The sheikh answer a different question, how to treat your father who is rude to you, should have been the question tho. The sheikh didnt address the relationship issues coming from fear and is distance and how to fix that. The elder being the father in this case needs to fix that due to the fact that he is the mature one and is teaching his offspring, so they can use that to teach their offspring. There should be respect and love between a father and a son, and not fear and distance!!!! When you have established respect, a child wouldnt do xyz... because that child doesnt want to disappoint his father. Children have a right over their parents, and one of their rights is proper tarbiya, this means the parents need to give 100% or more. When you establish fear for an 18yrs old son, you have put in 20% of the parenting, it is easy to parent from the fear based upbringing because it doesnt need alot of time and effort!

[jean-pierrecoffe]

"RUDE" fathers not "root" fathers my sister! The subtitles are funny at 3:30

May Allah reward you for your hard work

[nufailanoon]

If a father hurts his child emotionally and insults him the child is allowed to respond (not religiously). These parents have gone out of hand and are using religion to support their extreme control over their children

[dangrille]

He specifically says “rude” and explains it about two towards the end. Try to listen again

[omarmohammad]

Show this to sisters in the west they don't respect their fathers and say stuff like don't judge me so that they can sin freely.

[sAPuTra_un]

Unfortunately the sheikh hasn't answered the real question. The question is about fear-driven and distant relationship and has nothing to do with responsibilities. It's a matter of closeness. Many sons obey and respect their fathers but don't feel close to them. And that's why the asker was asking about sons, because the issue happens more with sons rather than with daughters.

[musafirghayrmaeruf]

The bottom line:
No matter who or what your father is you must be dutiful in all things except what displeases Allah.
Because after Allah noone has greater authority on you on this earth than your father.

[youareamazing]

At the end of the day isn't there should be a peace at home?

[GiganticMythicalSpaceFishWhale]

I often àrguè with my father, more so ìf hè stàrt to sày bàd wòrds to my mother.

But however bròkèn he ìs, ì stìll prày for his àkhìràt. Like, the làst thing ì wànnà seè in àkhìràt is for my pàrènts to strùgģlè in their hìsàb.

[WolverineLogan-rgzt]

A terrible father or husband using religion to control his child and wife is awful. Thats why we get a bad rep in the west. I get the need to be respectful at times but the narcissistic father should be held accountable.