3 secrets to dating after divorce

[libbysmith]

You are so very right! My BIN was married and divorced three times with a couple of live in GF's in between. Every one of them was the same person. They had different names but they had the same personalities. 😮

[jamesredman]

In my divorce care class they told of research that showed you need to grieve and work through feelings for about two years after. In my case we hadn't lived under the same roof for 7+ years when we made it official, but I still had some things to work through following that. My first date was a year after getting the papers, and that was probably about right.
Yes. Analyze what went wrong, take responsibility for your part in it, understand how not to do that again.

[JosephBallard-fspy]

I've been divorced for 3 years now. I've had 2 relationships since my ex-wife. Every one of them was different. It felt like I was slowly figuring out exactly what I wanted in a partner and where I stand on a personal level along the way. I'm content to stay single and keep working on myself while co-parenting with my ex-wife, until life presents someone to me at the right time. I'm mentally healthier than I've ever been in my life

[bobs]

Sarah you are absolutely right. Since my divorce, I find myself drawn to women just like my ex. Fortunately, I recognize and accept the fact that I need someone different. The problem is that in today's society, feminist/boss babes are the rule. I need an exception, in an area where the dating pool is unbelievably small.

[davidm]

My toxic, emotionally abusive marriage ended a year and a half ago. I went on 1 date a few months ago and it was pretty casual, still in the realm of friends.

I still have healing too do and it's not wise to cover my pain by sleeping around.

If this was baseball and I had knee surgery, I wouldn't be out there running the bases a week later, so this is the same thing.

One day, God willing, I'll be fully healed and find an amazing woman who loves me for who I am. I owe it to her and myself to take the time to heal properly.

[nomorewar]

Biggest one is heal first - take some counselling - otherwise you’ll find someone with the same traits your X had - and try to “fix” what was broken back then with the current one.

[themeg]

Just got divorced after 20 yrs of marriage. Wife cheating and somehow it’s my fault 🙄. Been almost a year and I’m still not interested in dating. Guess i’m still in that bitter / pissed off / cant trust phase… Still makes me nauseous to think about all the lies she told me and I had no clue…

[atk]

Most of us don't get the option to F the pain away.

[hansgrubber]

Thank you my beautiful therapist Sarah for the wonderful tips. I love this new format and your natural beauty. 😊

[wsmm]

I feel that smashing is the way to go. I've been single for three years and have never been happier

[markmccann]

The divorce care program is significantly helpful, the small group through church, and a lot of self reflection on what part you had in the demise of the marriage are all a good start in the healing process
Good luck and God bless

[mahatmagandhi]

I dated a little after my divorce 25 years ago. But instead I used my time to work on other aspects of my life. And I’m glad I did. I saved a ton of money and have avoided a lot of stress. I’m sociable and I enjoy going out and meeting people, but I do value my aloneness too.

[darrenskjoelsvold]

Manosphere is just replacing one pain for another. Do the work or repeat old mistakes. Therapy and research and doing what you need to do to repair and fix yourself is the only way to get better. Takes time too. For me I had to be single for a long time so I had to turn women away so I didn't go back into the same patterns.

Thing is therapy is just like anything else. It's like going to the gym to get stronger. It's just a gym for your mind and your emotions and stuff. But now I think I've soured the pool around here. hehe... Told so many women no I think it's going to make things harder to get with a woman again. But whatever I had to work on me. I worked on me. Probably worth it. Besides the women I turned away likely were just going to be like my exwife anyway so it'll be worth it to find somebody that isn't the same.

[baggers-]

That's the reason I have been single for the last 14 years

[setafccobct]

I've been legally separated for 14 years and now half ways into my divorce. I'm so happy I'll be free soon. No regrets!

[RDan]

That's true. Part of a bad dating pattern was for me to understand that I kept being attracted to the same personality type of woman, though they seemed different. Then, I was able to break the pattern, and I met my wife. We've been married for nearly 16 years and have 2 sons.

[Emolovesblack]

Please add the podcast to the linktree. Or a pinned comment or something.

[Kabaselefh]

This is true, I attract toxic women for some reasons 😂. I have learned to peacefully reject them, some even advise me to lower my guard a little bit 😂, but I can’t. I have been celibate now for almost four years.

[jimevert]

I'm 3 1/2 years into divorce 5 years into separation. What made my journey so hard is that I was still raising my son in my house. I had a very limited social time. Again from one spectrum to another on which type of women ones that are completely like my ex and I've dated some that were absolutely 100% opposite . I've gone back and figured out why I like my ex and what went wrong. I have had a lot of fun and got to know some great women. I think I'm heading into a serious relationship that I didn't plan for but looking forward too. But it's baby steps dealing with fear of getting another who will turn on me

[harryricochet]

I easily solved this problem after I booted my ex-wife 13 years ago by simply not dating ever again. I'm happier today than at any time in my entire life and reassured in this choice by most of those single women I do come into contact with being totally and utterly nuts. I feel sorry for the young men of today who will never know the time I did when relationships were mostly fun and not fraught with danger.