An Eating Disorder Specialist Explains How Trauma Creates Food Disorders

As an eating disorder and trauma therapist, Ashley McHan sees patients with an array of issues with food. VICE speaks to her about our unhealthy relationship to food, how it contributes to disordered eating and the underlying causes, similarities and differences of various eating disorders.

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[alexandras.]

It's ironic how much eating disorders are not actually about food.

[kd]

Not eating always made me feel in control when life felt the most out of control.

[EH]

"The more we restrict, the more likely we are to overeat. And the more we divide foods into good and bad, right and wrong, the more anxiety we're likely to have and the more distress and preoccupations we're likely to have with food and eating."
PREACH.

[shandacrouch]

I remember going to my GP to finally get help for my bulimia and she said "you don't look like you have an eating disorder" "you look fine to me" when in reality I've had an eating disorder for 10 years and at the time of seeing her I was binging and purging ever day and sometimes up to 7 or so times a day every single day. You can't just look at someone and know they are sick. The medical system needs to be better educated in these matters

[bbbones]

I had an eating disorder since high school till I was about 25. I'm 36 now and let me tell you, the BEST thing for EDs is to not be around people who cause you stress, or be in stressful situations. Another thing is my son's dad taught me the real value of food - I saw him grow edible gardens everywhere we lived with love and care, and he taught me to basically respect my body more and to give it what it needs to thrive. SO a loving nurturing environment is NEEDED to facilitate healing. There are a lot of healing holistic centers everywhere that teach that health is love and vice versa. And get away from physical and emotional toxicity, no amount of therapy will work if you stay in toxic environments and relationships.

[kirkearles]

I wish I could just walk away from food like an alcoholic can walk away from alcohol but I can't. This body requires me to eat daily and I have to face the ed everyday. It's damning.

[nasrinv]

Would’ve been nice if she mentioned that not all ppl with ED are super thin

[pmn]

She has a really nice voice, like a mother's.

[aprillunger]

Eating disorders are about control. We have no control anywhere else, so we control our diet. We’re not even realizing we’re doing it at first. It just becomes. Unless you experience it...you just don’t get it. We have to decide to get better for ourselves. No one can do it for us.

[pawoo]

As someone who had severe eating disorders for roughly 15 years but overcame it and has been healthy for almost 7 years now, I want to say that it’s possible to get through it and get better. If you’re suffering from eating disorders please don’t give up. You’ll get through it. 💜

Edit: 3 years since I made this comment, STILL HEALTHY and content with my body. Everyone, you can do it. I believe in you, and I promise, life is so much better. Take care ❤️

[Arlyneya]

Today marks 30 days of abstinence for me from Compulsive Over Eating and Binge Eating Disorder. I am am in recovery and I am just praying for 30 more days. Having an eating disorder is excruciating and humiliating, and all I want is to get better.. to be normal. But in order to do that, I have no choice but to surrender and allow myself to just focus on today. Not next week, next month, next year; just today. And that’s how I’ll get through, one day (and one meal) at a time.

[kizzyfoshizzy]

I feel like I can’t say that I ever had an eating disorder because I was never diagnosed and was never underweight :/ I lost my period, was extremely obsessed with food and restriction, built up so much anxiety around what I ate, etc. still haven’t gotten over some of these things :(

[Christopher]

I remember being 11 and 12 years old and developing anorexia. I was bullied by a large group of girls at the new school I attended every single day. I was in a fight basically every day for the entire time I went to that school... I wouldnt eat at lunch, I didnt care about eating breakfast, and I chose not to eat supper because what was the point? I had no appetite whatsoever.
I distinctly remember my teacher reading us a book about a girl who had an eating disorder. I took that book home and used it as a tool on how to better "control" my eating disorder. I used it as a way to learn how to keep my eating disorder a secret, how to lose more weight, and what to do about food I didn't want to eat...
Finally, my family had decided to move and I was placed in a different school. My new friends had began noticing how I never ate and how skinny I was getting... and they voiced their concern. That's when I finally began allowing myself to eat a little bit. Eventually, I began eating more often and finally I began gaining a healthy amount of weight...
But all in all, trauma DOES create eating disorders. The trauma of the racism and being bullied had made me anorexic. Please, teach your children to love others and to embrace peoples differences so this doesnt happen to anyone else.
Thank you.

[Asuma]

This the same lady that is treating the mac n cheese addict!

[leletaylor]

When she mentioned about the sensing for belonging and a place to fit in, that hit so deep. Since I could remember I’ve always been bigger, both taller and heavier, than my contemporaries and I always felt out of place.

[samanthad]

For me, when I feel like shit in my life is getting out of control, the “ED” makes me feel as though it’s the one thing I CAN control. Trauma is definitely a key role that triggered it from the beginning. 😞

[oh_kale_yeah]

Please please do an update of the Mac n cheese guy in the future! I would love to know how he is doing! Best of luck to you young sir!! 😊

[patrickdallaire]

I'm so glad she mentioned ARFID. I'm one of those males she mentions; the kind who used to hide in shame, not knowing I was struggling with a diagnosable and treatable eating disorder.

It's a little frustrating when I read a pamphlet or a poster about eating disorders and ARFID isn't mentioned. I only learned about ARFID (called Selective Eating Disorder at the time) at least a decade of struggle. A specialist noticed my behavior in a public setting and informed me in private. I'm still struggling but there is a noticeable improvement; progress I might not have had if it wasn't for that coincidence. Without awareness and treatment, I might have avoided more trips and social events just because of the food.

If you suspect someone you know is struggling with ARFID please let them know about it. It was a huge relief for me to learn about this disorder; that I wasn't just "picky", that my anxiety in front of food was real and that there are other people like me. You'll be a hero to anyone by bringing this to light for them.

[ariesx]

The therapy for eating disorders I experienced was all body related which actually made things worse. It‘s nice to know there are therapists out there who treat the cause instead of the symptoms.

[kirasussane]

She has such soothing voice and presence.