My Pregnancy Journey with ADHD: An Update

Hello Brains and Hearts! I’ve received a lot of questions about my pregnancy journey (and my ADHD while pregnant!), so I decided to answer as many questions as I could! It’s a bit of a long video so please feel free to use the chapters to skip around to the questions that you’re more interested in. :)

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Articles and studies

Discontinuing Stimulant Medication Negatively Impacts Pregnant Women with ADHD

Atomoxetine in Early Pregnancy and the Prevalence of Major Congenital Malformations: A Multinational Study

Parental ADHD in pregnancy and the postpartum period – A systematic review

The Effects of Drugs used for the Treatment of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) on Pregnancy Outcome and Breast-feeding: A Critical Review

The association between psychostimulant use in pregnancy and adverse maternal and neonatal outcomes: results from a distributed analysis in two similar jurisdictions

The Course of ADHD during Pregnancy

Placenta previa

Definitions

Relaxin: a hormone that helps "relax" a pregnant person's body during late pregnancy in preparation for childbirth. Source: VeryWellFamily

Doula: a professional trained in childbirth who provides emotional, physical, and educational support. Source: American Pregnancy Association

Video chapters
00:00 - Intro
00:41 - An Important Note
01:23 - Did you stop taking your ADHD medication while pregnant?
03:37 - Which symptoms have improved or gotten worse while pregnant?
05:34 - Did you have any pregnancy cravings?
07:37 - Have you had any hyperactivity struggles while pregnant?
09:06 - Do you have a doula?
10:50 - Have you started thinking about creating routines to help yourself better navigate the first year/baby phase?
12:58 - Do you ever get overstimulated just being in your own body with the physical discomfort of pregnancy?
15:00 - Do you have a sleep plan figured out for the newborn phase?
16:05 - Have you developed any organizational plans for her room or the house that are ADHD-friendly?
18:02 - How do you EVEN while pregnant with ADHD?!?! Chronic pain, fatigue, bad brain days, executive function and time management…
19:20 - How open are you to people feeling your belly?
20:18 - How has being pregnant changed your outlook on self-care?
21:04 - If you’re dealing with anxiety/fear how are you coping with that?
24:29 - What research have you been doing? To prepare, what have you found helpful?
26:07 - Has Chloe helped as a service dog in different/new ways during pregnancy?
27:41 - How did you decide IF you wanted children? Did you always know or did you consider not?
29:24 - How about tips for a soon to be ADHD dad on looking after the mum during labor without getting too excited/hyper?
30:54 - How are you actually doing and feeling right now?
30:06 - Video Wrap Up & Future Series!

Music credits for "My Pregnancy Journey with ADHD: An Update":
"Life of Riley", "Carefree", "Monkeys Spinning Monkeys", "The Show Must Be Go”
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0

[HowtoADHD]

Hello from the hospital! An even more recent update -- baby's doing really well, I'm just here for monitoring and in case I go into labor early due to the placenta/vasa previa situation (turns out there is a baby blood vessel running over my cervix, but it's not a true vasa previa because thankfully there's still a bit of placenta previa too). C section is scheduled for 36 weeks which is February 29th :) She's gonna be a leap year baby!!

[JustinThorntonArt]

My wife has anxiety and depression. She went off meds during pregnancy until she had the worse anxiety attack of her life that landed her in the emergency room. The er doctors refused to give her anything and refused to contact her obgyn. Was a mess. Her obgyn was so angry she never got contacted and told us anxiety to that level was a higher risk than the medication.

So she got on a medication that had the lowest risk. We now have a happy six year old.

So the moral of the story is that getting off medication isn’t always the right answer despite what the common belief is. Look into all the risk factors and not just the one from the medication.

[Makeitloveitkeepit]

3 kids and ADHD mom here.

Just let go of plans and go with the flow.
Be love, and don't forget to eat or drink.
A baby will slow you down like a hammer to the head.

Be loving to yourself.

[EthOrlen]

My advice as the ADHD dad:

1) Be aware that babies are time vortexes, those first couple weeks it’s so easy to lose hours just looking at them while they sleep. Add that to ADHD time blindness, and you’re super at risk.

2) You may have to become very opportunistic. Babies will break whatever routines and schedules you put in place. Our parent group facilitator is fond of saying, “You can’t make your baby sleep unless you hit them very hard in the head, or drug them; both of which are illegal.” We’ve found that holds true for other things, like eating or playtime. So, you do your best with schedules and routines, but at the end of the day you make the most of whatever the moment presents you.

[Luna_meadow]

I saw one of your videos a few months back, and it changed my world. I was just diagnosed with ADHD and ASD at the age of 47. Thank you for your videos.

[m.maclellan]

I am 61 years old. When I was a kid, folks often used a dresser drawer for the babies "bed" !!!!
When you went visiting, the baby was put down to nap on the biggest bed available & folks made fabric "walls" out of everyone's coats ! Lol ! 😆
Don't get hung up on what society thinks !
I think your little nursey is PERFECT ! Everything is close to hand and would take 2 minutes to clean, Lol !
As far as your update, best of luck. Sounds like you have an AMAZING team ! ❤

[daringpursuitsadhdcoaching]

C-section and Point-of-Performance tip: You want to move to aid in recovery, but also recognize that you should take it easy. One of the best things we did in the second pregnancy was create baskets for places where I'd be resting downstairs, or taking the baby in the middle of the night when my partner needed to sleep. The basket had stuff for the baby so I didn't have to get up and find things: wipes, diapers, pacifiers, nipple guards/wipes/lotion for breastfeeding, extra clothes, extra baby blankets/burp cloths. Stuff for you: bottles of water, granola bars/trail mix, a book to read and/or notebook to journal, and lotion/chapstick (especially because we live at high altitude). If and when I needed someone to bring me something, I'd ask them to bring a few (when possible) to restock my basket or add some for later. We also had 2 of those breastfeeding pillows and a couple of extras that we could leave in multiple places so I wasn't up looking for them. The best thing anyone ever told me was "You don't have to have this all figured out by the time you go to the hospital, or even by the time you bring them home. Your baby will help you find a rhythm and a routine that works for both of you." Good Luck!

[puppypoet]

I am so excited! My son is 10 and we are so close. Being a mom is very hard and very worth it.

When my son was a baby, he would "cry for no reason", so we would rub his shoulders, joints, muscles, and he'd stop crying.

His doctor said babies crying for no reason are because their body grows at half their full height in just the first year of their life.

So they basically hurt like we do when we use our muscles too much. Massages helped him so much.

[jessicadudleyrood]

I had my baby almost a year ago. I was diagnosed ADHD as a child and have been on meds and on this journey for almost 20 years.
I've found pregnancy (particularly the meds decisions) and becoming a mum one of the hardest things to navigate as a woman with ADHD... and a woman who felt she'd pretty much got things manageable at this point in life and then everything turned upside down and I've had to relearn and refigure out so much! (And still am!). Grateful that you're speaking about this topic that I didn't find much info about when I was pregnant!

[Joyfillied]

Yes!!!! During both of my pregnancies, I was much more cautious with what I ingested emotionally…I avoided social media stress, movies that made me feel anxious for the characters, etc…I felt like if my precious kiddo can feel what I do, I’d better give her (and then him for our second one) the best emotional experience I can and keep her (and him) safe…I also miscarried both, but for that period of time, I was Mama Bear & did my best to protect them both…❤

[chrishorner]

Here's a tip for the first year of sleeping. The Mrs. and I had a really good strategy where I would get up first and change babies diaper and whatnot so I can just hand the baby over to feed. Then half nap during the feeding and when done put baby back to bed while the Mrs. gets back to sleep.

Plan on this process taking a lot longer than you think it does right now. Especially putting the baby back to sleep can be very difficult to figure out at first. But if you both work together it makes it a lot easier.

[pinkcupcake]

I'm coming to an age where choosing to have kids or not is a serious consideration, and this has definitely brought me some relief and comfort surrounding the fears and anxieties. You're going to do great!

[fadedace]

So proud of your progress! Making this channel, writing a whole book, and now having a kid. This is an amazing step for you, and I'm glad to see the journey! Thank you for being awesome.

[SusanCleaver-ih]

When I was pregnant, I used a mantra, "The odds are on my side." This kept me off the worry train.

[AdrianeErin]

Mom of a two-year-old and I have ADHD. I also had a csection. As much as we want to plan everything, it all goes out the window when the baby is born. Our priorities change, the baby personality isn't what we thought, etc etc. My biggest advice is learn how to let it go. Learn to be OK with the change and the unknown. It'll make your experience as a mother so much smoother. ❤ congratulations.

[lifestylecreep]

Your closet nursery is GENIUS! So excited for you!!

[kikitauer]

I found that I've been supporting Jessica on Patreon for five years this month! It's always been just a dollar because I can't afford more. But I am SO HAPPY I do it ♥🤗

[BumbleSmeeBee]

I had my kiddo at the start of the pandemics and am expecting another so I’ll say this for routines: they are good to have, but they work best if they kinda grow organically? Some kiddos have an awful time falling asleep, and others sleep very easily. Parenting books sometimes make it seem like if their method doesn’t work for you, that must mean you’re just Not Doing It Right, but that is nonsense. Read the books, get the advice, but following your baby’s cues and patterns is probably what works best. All that said, the older they get, the more important deciding on and holding boundaries can become.

Other advice I’ll give: everything is a season! What you have trouble with one week/one month will be replaced with something else the next.

This probably all seems super vague and hard to follow, but I’ll repeat: the parenting books are good background info for basic structures and ideas, but your kid will be unique and it’ll take your insight and problem solving skills to figure out how to help them and create routines that work for the whole family.

[lindajohn]

Definitely get a Postpartum doula. After pregnancy, in some cultures, older women (mom or aunts or grandmas) would stay with the new mom and baby for 2 months.  

First: I did not know I had ADHD when I had my child. At 4 weeks I had a horrific experience with postpartum depression … and I did not know what was happening. And the medical profession seemed to suspect but did not tel me until AFTER I recovered somewhat. I am certain the ADHD along with the sharp drop in estrogen was responsible for how severe my symptoms were. At 5 weeks postpartum, I joined a mommy/baby exercise class 2 days a week. I think that saved me from a reoccurrence of the severe depression.

Second: I also had a c-section. I had needed a lot more time for recovery after that surgical birth. But my impulsiveness combined with my mom/baby instincts caused me to do really unsuitable things. One day I noticed that there was a closet mirror door that was installed wrong in our new-to-us house (we moved when I was 4 months pregnant and very sick with bronchitis). So I went in 3 days after the surgical birth and lifted it off its runner and laid it on the floor because it ‘wasn’t safe’. This was a very impulsive choice and NOT good for my body. I also could not seem to sit still and rest enough. Fortunately, my husband was home with me the first week, and his mom and dad were with me the second week, but on week three and four when I was alone all day, and in a new town, and had NO friends or family around, my mental and emotional health nose dived.

so, please, get a postpartum doula and have people around you as much as possible during the first 4-8 weeks. If someone offers, and they are a safe person, say ‘yes’.

And I remember one important advice from my husband’s mom: When the baby sleeps, You Sleep!

Love to you and baby and daddy.

[bethanyatkinson]

You asked how it works when you're already busy to add time with a child... I can't speak for everyone, but for myself, my priorities changed. All of a sudden, many of the things I used to do just didn't seem as important. I'd rather be with my kids :). It was really natural for me.