How To Make People Respect You In SECONDS... | Secret Agent Evy Poumpouras

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[IGNITION]

“Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.” —Abraham Lincoln

[enock]

One thing my mentor taught me a long time ago that worked well for me was this: focus on the people that respect you and the rest will follow eventually. I have found that to be true for me.

[Yetipfote]

"do you have anything beneficial to say? If no then don't talk." this is very very good.

[bigdoze]

They teach this in US Marine Corps leadership training. They call it command voice and command presence. Has been very helpful for me ever since learning it.

[ocuussx]

Watch out with never speaking in meetings because you are too concerned with your ‘contribution’ score. If you are silent, the person who speaks will get higher up in the corporate ladder, you will be ignored and overlooked at. So what to do? Something that helped me immensely to add to the conversation is ASKING QUESTIONS. 3 things happen when you do this; 1. You are talking, so people notice you. 2. You will be considered as a critical thinker, because you ask questions. 3. You will have added value because 9 times out of 10, other people have the same or similar questions but don’t say anything.

[davidm]

As a teacher I use this stuff all the time. Sometimes just slowing down, giving extra attention to enunciation, changing my posture (leaning in, etc), and dropping my volume is all it takes to get their attention focused back on me.

[KwertyKeys]

I have experienced this - I say something I know is valuable, but I get ignored. I repeat it a few times and still get ignored - THEN, another person will repeat what I’ve just said, almost word for word, and everyone turns to them and says ‘That’s a great idea, let’s do this ’ and my idea - which I’ve just said out loud several times, is now credited to them. It’s so frustrating seeing your work be ignored, but then blatantly stolen and credited to another, RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE.
I left the company after that happened six times, and I set up as self employed. I know this happens to other people, mostly women.

[fugitive]

Ifvyou are too nice, too good, people will perceive it as weakness

[tommythompson]

"I set the tone", this is how I handle my meetings. Love how she said it!

[neelgowariker]

I like the fact that she applies what she says. In the first 4 mins. of this interview, when he started talking, she immediately went silent and let him speak.

[hotoceanmusic]

I was mentored from the start of my career by high-level Japanese factory managers. The basic philosophy was that leadership is responsible for providing the necessary and sufficient conditions for subordinates to succeed. And when they did not succeed (short of sabotage and blatantly disregarding rules/procedures, a rarity), then the leader must reflect on what conditions they did not sufficiently provide, and rectify the situation accordingly. To sum it up, the shit tended to roll uphill in the Japanese factories that I worked with.

[lozpamphilon]

I’m a student teacher and I think everything said here is applicable to the classroom too. Very helpful.

[jojo]

At 7:10 you talk about setting up initial boundaries and not being people's friend, and then later you can relax. I learned this as a substitute teacher. I was given this advice before I started, but couldn't follow it for real at first, and would give in too soon. If I was soft during the first 15 minutes, the rest of the day would be a nightmare. If I was super strict during the first 15 minutes, even a little cranky, after that I could be buddies with the kids and things would go smooth. It was all about the first 15 minutes of my time with a class, and I watched the clock to make sure I didn't relax too soon. If I didn't set the standard then, it was almost impossible to get control at a later point no matter how angry and punishing I became.
It was crazy to watch this in real time. I leaned to put off my morning cup of coffee till I was already at school so the kids could meet me when I had no tolerance for nonsense. Halfway through the day, I'd let them call me by me first name and could just relax. Sometimes I hated being a hardass during the first bit of class, but it was the key. Other substitute teachers gave me this advice, it took me a few weeks to figure out how to put it into action, since it way not my natural personality. But I learned from this that I could have control and be friends too, it was all about timing.

Because of this experience, I try hard not to judge people by first impressions. It's challenging, but manipulative people instinctively know that if they make a good first impression they can screw around later and use it as a key manipulation tactic. I am now overly suspicious of people who make too good of a first impression. I was the opposite, I would get anxious and overwhelmed when I don't know people and often make a bad first impression and then work hard to show my worth. While I'd get verbal compliments on my performance and positive reviews, others would get promoted who were clearly doing less and there seems to be no way to undue that first impression. I want to see people for who they are, I've noticed how most people are fooled, even when later consistent evidence makes it so clear that someone is not who they pretended to be at first. I want to be the person who rewards good work and sees everyone for who they are, even if they are nervous or awkward, and isn't just going on impressions.

[pvtrichardsonbr]

Tbh every time im in a group of people i notice im always talked over or interrupted. I use to rage over it, now i simply sit back and say nothing until my presence in the conversation is noticed to missing. If its not noticed i know what circle to leave.

[Andie]

You missed a great chance to address an even more pressing issue, one that afflicts most people, way more than a boss feeling disrespected by his subordinates: a subordinate feeling disrespected by his/her boss, which is much, much more tricky, but also very common. And considering that most people are not bosses, but subordinates, this is quite an issue. Perhaps because Stephen is a boss, he subliminally avoided the issue. He started to bring it up and then, turned it around to make it about the boss feeling disrespected. Most bosses are not like Evy, they blame others for their mistakes, disregard other people’s opinions, etc., etc. And because they have more power, they often abuse it.

[elizabethcartagena-vptp]

I genuinely think like her. Never was afraid of conflict or confronting things. Never understood the pressure of speaking when I have nothing to say, I simply am there to learn. I'm realizing just how toxic my demographic is and I need to leave this place.

[leannabedore]

Oh man this is gold. The worst meetings are the ones asking questions on and on and on. It wastes others' time and can tell they are just talking to talk. She nailed it, is it VALUABLE? I have one coworker who does this and she is always late and THEN asks nonvaluable questions too🙄

[Bunny]

I love her She is a breath of fresh air. And I agree with the tone. Being petite and people think I’m meek I talk very assertively. So many annoying females at work who talk to just hear themselves.

[graceartsgifts]

I love how confident Evy is and how she breaks down the communication ❤😊 God Bless

[amandamccarty]

I find it thoughtful of her to ask the one who made the mistake if she did anything that impacted it.