How People THINK Clerics are Played VS How they're ACTUALLY Played

Clerics, the Sassy Healers.

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#dnd #dungeonsanddragons #cleric

[OneShotQuips]

Can we rename Clerics “Sassy Healers”?

[Rzulf]

In Cleric's defense, their casting stat is essentially Common Sense, so they're surrounded by (comparative) idiots all the time

[NobleWolf]

Cleric: * heals the party *
Warlock: * heals the party *
Bard: * heals the party *
Paladin: * heals the party *
Wizard: * heals the party *
Cleric: Why am I in this party?!
Barbarian: * rages to heal the party *
Cleric How?!
Lich: * heals the party *
Cleric: * leaves the party*

[LadyGameshine]

Well I'm early. Heads up to everyone, he is getting laser eye surgery, the red spots are a side effect, everything is well and dandy and we don't have to worry! He said this in the community tab!

[noctusdoesthings]

The party: "You said you'd be playing a healer!"
Me, playing a Cleric of Nerull and bent on covering the world in a plague of undeath so thick it could be felt from the astral plane: "No, I said I'd be playing a cleric. If you wanted clarification, you could have asked which god I was championing."

[superj]

My current Cleric is the party tank, damage dealer, and healer, and I'm loving every minute of it.

[Shaderox]

Cleric stereotype: Priest-type characters that's only good for healing.
Cleric reality: probably the most versatile class as they're tanky full-casters that can be whatever they want with their very diverse choices of subclasses.

[Lord-Wheatabix]

The Cleric: "I swear to God, I will not heal you guys if you start another tavern fight!"

[koenvandepoll]

Very true, and might I add:
"No, I won't spend my turn healing you! The DM literally said the boss was on its last legs. I'll just end the fight and heal you afterwards."

[michaelpeace]

I know that you had laser eye surgery and that the red spots are a side effect of that and that you’re OK which is good. However, I only really noticed it whenever you are portraying how the Cleric was actually played a.k.a. why the cleric is always mad at his party. It did add flavor to it, that the stress of being the healer and always having to heal the rogue or resurrect the barbarian is just getting to him lol.

[Ninjia]

as someone once said, ” You need the cleric, but the cleric don’t need you”

[TedMattos]

I recall playing a healer in an MMORPG (City of Heroes). I told the team: "I'm happy to keep you healed, but please don't run away from the team into a different room and go renegade. I won't chase you down." Later, a member did just that and continued to yell, "HEAL! HEAL! HEY HEALER! COME HEAL ME!"

I got a sick satisfaction of watching his health drop to zero as I continued to heal the majority of the party.

[ihlly]

"Sometimes violence IS the answer!" is probably what went on in our own cleric's head when all the rest of us died one time and he had to finish off 3 orcs by himself

[ThordantheDwarf]

One time one of my players who were playing cleric got so sick of being the healer and switched to bard and SLAPPED the Wizard/Artificer to DEATH

[miloxyunto]

Party member: Should we buy potions?
Other member: No we got a cleric.
War Domain Cleric: ("Ok so if I cast spiritual weapon, and attack one round, I can cast inflict wounds and attack with the spirit weapon next round. I'll also use guiding bolt for long range attacks. And just incase I need to, I'll prepare shield of faith". *doesnt prepare healing spells*)

[eddieattrill]

Light clerics: Why waste time healing the party when you can just set everything that wants to harm the party on fire before it even has the chance to!

[thecharmingone]

“Ah, the life of an adventuring cleric. I know it all too well. A perpetual struggle to maintain the hit point total of four to five nigh-suicidal tomb raiders determined to deplete them at any cost.”

[aurorareed]

Absolutely incredible video, you just forgot something very important

Party: “You are the dedicated healer, you can’t be strong and independent and survive on your own”
Cleric: “Wanna bet?” *one-shots the boss with inflict wounds* “I’ll do this to you all without any hesitation if needed”

[Pancakeli]

One of my favorite cleric memes will always be that anime doctor with a gun:
"I'm a healer, but... *inflict wounds*"
Always remember, killing something now is like future healing!

[LocalMaple]

The one “how cleric is actually played” that you missed.

Regularly clothed Player: walks into the room. “Heys guys! Sorry I’m one minute late…”
Table: DM, Wizard, Rogue, and Paladin.
DM: “All we need now is…”
Back to Player, now wearing Cleric costume: “Really?”